Writing. Is writing a skill or is it just a means of expressing ones thoughts? For example, is writing really a way of expressing one’s inner self? Do you self talk? I do. I find it helps to have a good self talk. Yes, I ask myself all these painstaking questions. See I’m an inquisitive bastard when it comes to myself. So I say “Hey Sandy, what are you doin?” “Nothin much” I reply to myself. “Who ya gunna vote for?” “Dunno” “What ya havin for tea?” “Food, I suppose” I’ll reply with total disdain.
So yeah, I have deep and meaningful conversations with myself constantly. In fact it helps me pass the time. Time you ask? Time only occurs when there is motion. So I have this theory, lets just stop moving and we can all live forever. Right? Well maybe not and it goes without saying that this theory has some serious flaws. But who gives a zark, not this broken down parish priest. Anyhoo, that’s another story.
So writing is a group of letters that one strings together to form a sentence. But a sentence can also be a punishment, a verdict, a conviction and condemnation. So if I write a sentence am I condemning myself by verdict to convicted punishment? Gees arse, all these rules with words, this is worse than maths.
I’d like to tell you a story. A story of a country drive. For us city dwellers, the lovely Belinda and I, we need country drives, believe me, I mean I’m a priest after all. So here goes…..
The valley stretched out before us, gradually disappearing into the distance that concluded with the looming mountain range. The sun was kind to us today as usually here in the deep south the summers are hot and dry. Today is cloudy and rain is falling, gracing the ground with delicious nutrition for the soil.
The road, gravel of course, winds through the hills and vales crossing brooks trickling with water. Livestock dot the paddocks interrupted occasionally by crows and magpies searching for a feed of insects.
We pass numerous homesteads enwreathed by trees that provide both a windbreak and shade. Most have abundant outhouses and some farm machinery some of which are beyond their use by date.
We ascend to the top of the small mountain as the wind starts to lift. We stop and admire the 360 degree vista. We watch the rain clouds drift across the valley creating a patchwork quilt of colours and textures that stimulate the senses and purgers the soul. The wind and rain make us cold to the bone.
A vacant rotunda sits in the park. We dine under its protective roof on antipasti, dolmades, olives cheese and crusty bread. All washed down with a glass of wine. It doesn’t get any better than this. This should be everyday, should I wish for it to be my groundhog day?
Driving back home our colloquies diminish and we let the music stop on the CD player. This allows us to cherish the sounds of the rain and allow our senses to absorb the beautiful smell of water and dust and the birds. All of us enjoying the effects of the rain.
Our thoughts become reflective as we re-live our day, out in the country. We’re returning to the concrete jungle. The noise, the traffic and the congestion. This doesn’t mean it’s bad or wrong it’s just the countryside makes me feel so free and so open while the city closes me in.
The drive continues as we wind down through the hills and back to town. Other motorists are unaware of our relaxing trip and our connection with nature. The other motorists kept their aggressive driving styles while we idled through the streets in relax mode.
We return home to find nothing had changed except ourselves. Forever now, a memory of the Bremer Valley, the vista, the winding roads and the diverse bird-life.
Life’s like that I guess!
H said:
sandshoe, I have put most of my books nilly-willy onto the shelves, I will check later if I still have those Simone Beauvoir’s titles here, have read them, but might have lent them to Daughter. I often find some of mine on her shelves…
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H said:
oops, this was meant as reply to shoe’s post lower down…
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Sandshoe said:
H, I went hunting for a small review I recalled I wrote about a volume of Simone’s. Too incredible I found it, almost under my nose, but as well a collection of skeleton reviews akin to promotion tags for a number of books about Simone and others’ books regards the nature of their experience of Catholicism.
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Sandshoe said:
Thank you Hung, for this place.
————————————————————————-
de Beavoir, S. The Woman Destroyed (Flamingo, 1984)
First Published in 1967, the final fictional work of Simone de Beauvoir’s to be published derives its title from the last of three short stories which are three, different, women’s. Each woman is expressive of anxiety about relationship with a male partner and children. Mistrust of her own judgement dominates the first. Bitterness inspires Murielle in ‘The Monologue’. In ‘The Woman Destroyed’, in fear of her own failure and in an ultimate state of paranoia, Monique is obsessed with ageing.
CBW.
Previously published: TWHA* Tenants’ Newsletter
* The Women’s Housing Association Newsletter.
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Sandshoe said:
I might regard the essays differently now of course. I must read them again (for the third time.)
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Sandshoe said:
I wrote that note of a review at least ten years ago.
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Sandshoe said:
The illustration of the man at his desk in the field is a delightful picture, but how about that valley. That’s a homesteader’s to hanker after.
“…And the azurous hung hills are his world-wielding shoulder
Majestic – as a stallion stalwart…”
is that darned line from Gerald Manley Hopkins, ‘Hurrahing in Harvest’.
It’s a wondrous thing to be 16 and drinking in words out of school poems.
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gerard oosterman said:
Nice bit of word arrangement. Much more than just knit and pearl. Nice and I enjoyed your afternoon drive. Any descending sausages in low gear?
You are a surprise Hung, much more than just Yo. (ja)
Make sure you don’t catch a chill again. Keep the car window closed and avoid driving through suburban sprawl contagion.
Enjoy the glorious mornings now.
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Hung One On said:
Thank you Gerard. I actually wrote this piece using you as my mentor. I have always admired you style of being able to eloquently tell it as it is. 🙂 ja
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Big M said:
Dear Sister Hung,
You must have recovered from your stay in hospital. Hope you enjoyed the bed-bath/bonus enema from your colleagues at the Pig’s Arms.
Good to hear that Sandy’s managed to loosen the clerical collar, put the rag-top down on the old Zeph, tilt the battered Fedora back, and get out for a good, old fashioned Sundee drive with his beloved Belinda.
We return home to find nothing had changed except ourselves. So true.
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Hung One On said:
Thanks Big M. Self change is a wonderful thing. 🙂
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Hung One On said:
When I can
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Emmjay said:
Father, it’s great to hear from you.
Can there be a sweeter smell than rain falling through the dust ?
Or a more mellow sound than the one between the end of the last track and the end of the CD ?
Cheers,
Emm
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Hung One On said:
Beautiful moments MJ
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sandshoe said:
Hello Hung I’m back on the link comin’ at ya from “pieL…” the marvel of modern technology that sees me sitting in a hostel twiddling idling keys… others around me who are travellers going in and out might wonder what the attraction is to a screen instead of the world of the outsiders who are Melburnians and their visitors today. Wonder why the 11.3 just as I see Mike has published my arty fantasy with a 2.3 (aka version). What an interesting bit of writing Hung. I will be happy to read it at my leisure with a home-made coffee and familiar surrounds. This is cool tho’. This backpackers is sure going to be pleasant by appearances of the renovated section. The sound of the Carpenter Guys and the Pipe Guys yelling out to each other pleasantly, the dreamy state of being encircled by the low hum noise of the receptionist nearby and the, dare I call these young people mostly, children going to and fro, fluorescent tubes mixed up among and the far off noise of an occasional particularly screechy vehicle only, it’s dingy, divey, cheap, romantic way to travel reading Hung’s tale. Excellent and dreamy.
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Lehan Ramsay said:
Hung One On, I have to say I didn’t like it. I liked the first bit a lot, thought the second bit would have contained some of the first bit and was disappointed, really don’t like that last sentence. Bummer.
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Hung One On said:
Thanks Lehan, I appreciate that
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Lehan Ramsay said:
I’m glad about that. I like a lot of the stuff I’ve read.
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Hung One On said:
Lehan, honesty is an admirable attribute. As a small community it is difficult to be honest without upsetting someone however I welcome your feedback and do not take any personal umbrage. Thanks again. Please do not change 🙂
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Lehan Ramsay said:
It’s kind of uncomfortable, being honest. I looked at the story again. It’s just my thought but if, rather than that last sentence, you had moved back into musing about words again, even just for one short sentence, it would have made sense to me. The city bringing on thinking about thinking, moving into the country has you feeling, going back to the city you start thinking about thinking again…..
but the first part and “life’s like that” are kind of excluding each other….
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H said:
Hung, you are so right about it being hard to be honest in a small community of ‘story tellers’. I think it was Warrigal who said earlier on that we are not going to tell each other if we don’t like something.
Still, one can be kind and say something encouraging to anyone, whilst also at the same time be constructively critical… As adults that should not be too hard for us, to give and take..
By the way , I thought this was your best piece and I alerted Gez to it ,who also liked it…so there.
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Hung One On said:
H, thanks. I used Gez’ style to desribe the day of the drive.
Lehan, how about this alternate ending…
“Thinking about thinking got me thinking, flooding my thoughts that thanks to thinking I think.
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Lehan Ramsay said:
Okay I’m kind of stuck now. I can well see the merit to making a decision not to say if you don’t like something. But for me it would mean that if I wrote something and nobody or somebody said nothing it would mean that they didn’t like it. Everyone’s silence would then become criticism. Sometimes we just don’t have anything to say, and such a decision would force us into speaking when we didn’t feel a need to. Wouldn’t it?
– Permission requested to be acknowledged as a difficult person who too often says what she knows she shouldn’t. A big failing, and one that has me confined to a small town north of anywhere in order to limit my trouble-making. I say what I think because I prefer it to people figuring it out and resenting me for it. If I really think it’s going to cause trouble I say nothing. But I do realize that people can read nothing. It’s usually a waste of time to say nothing. You can’t be specific about nothingness, you have to take the interpretation that the other person puts on it as if it were your own, and the only way to fix it is to say something. Which is what you could have done in the first place.
Hung One On, I have to say I didn’t like that new sentence. There was some reason why your musing about thinking sent you out to the country, you never said what it was, you kind of glossed over something that sounded important, I remain disappointed. To be honest it seemed to me like there was something about the city that was scrambling your brain and you were going off to see what it was. And you found it but never told us what you found. Disappointing. It was not a problem with your wordsmithery, which is beautiful. Not that new sentence though, it’s more fluff.
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Lehan Ramsay said:
There is word-smithery. And then there is fluffery. Fluffery is when you say to someone “do you like my dress?” and the reply “is that a (insert designer label here)?
To the statement “I went on a journey” – “life’s like that” is not a response. Unless, of course, life is a journey. Which it is. Is that what you meant? If it is I can go back and read your story again, understanding that your trip to the country is representing your life right now. The city is closing you in. Life’s like that. Life is closing you in.
Then, I would take off the exclamation mark, that’s all. Life closing you in is something worthy of more than an exclamation mark. I think a full stop would have been more of an acknowledgement of Life’s unrelenting enthusiasm for closing us in.
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Lehan Ramsay said:
I can see how you were using Gez’s simplicity. But his simplicity doesn’t hide sentiment, in what I’ve read so far. It’s not a veil, it’s an open window. I think that yours did. Don’t mistake simplicity for sleight of hand.
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Lehan Ramsay said:
I was living in Tokyo, Hung One On, and travelling for miles on crowded trains most of every day. At the furtherest point from my house I found a beautiful black bamboo plant, and I struggled onto the train with it and brought it home. It got some kind of mould from that horrible Tokyo humidity, I stuck it out on the roof of the apartment block. One day I went up there and noticed it had died in the sweltering summer heat, and I thought to myself: I’ll take it inside and give it a good watering and it’ll be fine.
That was what made me realize what a complete cretin I become when I live in a big concrete city. I found myself a job back in kyoto, and then I found myself three little shacks on the hill over the pond with bamboo shooting up everywhere you looked. Clearly, it was bamboo that I needed, there. The problem might even have been resolved by my eating a lot of bamboo shoots for a while, who knows. It’s not that Tokyo didn’t or couldn’t suit me. It’s that I seem to be a little too susceptible to creeping mental inconsistencies, and all that noise in Tokyo messes with my sense of things. It’s also not the reason to give up on big cities; if you have a garden you can still connect to the real world. It’s a good reason though to take stock of the ways in which the city can confuse us animals, and realize that it aint us who have the problem. If you were not stimulated (and over-stimulated) by the city, there would be something wrong with you, so if it does that to you, figure it’s doing what it should be doing, and you are responding to that stimulation in the most intelligent way, by being overwhelmed by it.
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Lehan Ramsay said:
Think of yourself as a young animal, Hung One On. Young animals need a lot of stimulation; any kitten can tell you that. If a kitten is separated from it’s siblings it’s a good idea to give it a lot of play. But once it becomes adult, the same amount of stimulation isn’t necessarily going to be so good for it. Young people especially need the city, and crave it. As you get older, though, it simply distracts you away from things you need to think about, and adds discordant notes that distract you further. Maybe you have ambivalent thoughts toward the city? Anything with a “little drop of poison” gives us ambivalence. Not always a negative thing.
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Lehan Ramsay said:
I like my town with a little drop of poison
Nobody knows they’re lining up to go insane
I’m all alone, I smoke my friends down to the filter
But I feel much cleaner after it rains
(Tom Waits)
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Sandshoe said:
Lehan, I have enjoyed reading your string of further comments and I think to mention I loved on week-ends wandering around the back alleys of an industrial warehousing area that was no doubt full of danger and o, so much poison that I would stand on tip-toes and stare over the edge of those huge industrial rubbish receptacles, sometimes even having to find a crate to carry around to stand on. I feel a bit of a twinge when I consider my move to the country which is coming up soon. Even though I have not been for years on anything resembling a stalk through the gallery of industrial discards I have so enjoyed…so much poison.
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Sandshoe said:
When it rains on the oil slicks and the filthy plastic sheets lying beside the gutters, rainbows of colour and mould that spackles the underside of the plastic catches my eye.
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Lehan Ramsay said:
I like those kind of places, shoe.
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H said:
‘…who gives a zark’, this must Hung One On, and not Mel. Is Mel Belinda, or maybe Tutu ?
In them olden days people used to go for Sunday drives, do some still do I wonder…
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sandshoe said:
Sunday drives in the old green Morris Oxford were plain fun because mum and dad would invite along a friend for me-so naive was I that would continue forever- and we giggled and sang, blew mouth organ (dinkum) repetitively in the back seat and were allowed and wrapped towels around our overly indulged noggins pretending we were from a country that had sheiks wherever that was.
The picnic basket came out of the boot at the destination and there was even sometimes a boiler made plum pudding in it. Dad kept a butterfly net in the boot as well and stopped the car randomly, disappearing through the bush. Hung, my immediate boss on a community radio station was a parish priest (if you really are a priest) and my immediate boss in a job in a retail department store was a parish lay priest. There’s a bit of theme I’m across here. When I was a young thing of 16, a parish priest/chaplain gave me a gift of a couple of books after a couple of conversations… those, Simone de Beauvoir’s ‘Memoirs of a Dutiful Daughter’ and ‘The Prime of Life’… 1967, I think it? I’m off to watch a movie in the ‘Movie Space’ it is called at the backpackers where I am staying in Melbourne. Wonder if they will have one titled, ‘How I was an anarchist and decided that seemed attractive Chaos after all.’ 🙂
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sandshoe said:
I know who you are H even though I addressed Hung. It is absolutely true I truly began to chat with you, Helvi, about Sunday drives…one thing and another led on to an entirely anarchy sort of speech, but please to not worry. I’ve been out on the town. This is just to say I was agreeing with your question? I like a good enquiry.
🙂
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Big M said:
Hung was ordained as a Priest of the Intergalactic Cricket Board by Gordon himself.
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Hung One On said:
The Parish of St Generic Brand located at Inner Cyberia in the Western suburbs.
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Hung One On said:
Oh, and incorporates The Pigs Arms.
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Big M said:
Thanks be to Gordon for you, Sandy!
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Sandshoe said:
The movie I watched in that movie space so frightened the life out of BACKPACKERS (the toughest breed) with a girl at a dance consumed by the belief she had caused the carnage wished on a dancehall and all its attendees by her mother (it seemed somebody) followed by evil beyond all comprehension and the demise of the mother and a house exploding in flame, the BACKPACKERS leapt out of their movie seats before its end and huddled for a while telling each other to not be perturbed. 😦
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Sandshoe said:
Imagine I am glad to back from my travels and especially to know where the closest priest to The Arms is located.
😉
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theseustoo said:
Sounds like the movie you watched was ‘Carrie’, Sandshoe… An interesting example of the genre…
But you’ve no need to worry or be afraid; I’m quite sure that most of these ‘horror’ stories are written by christians (mostly catholics I’ll bet!) in order to frighten people into good behaviour… You’ll notice that it is the judeo-christian ‘Yaweh’ which invariably brings the horror to an end and disposes of the demons… thus supporting propagandistically, the christian paradigm. So, they are all just ‘fairy-stories’; albeit frightening ones…
🙂
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Sandshoe said:
I have such strong doubts, astyages that the good priest, Sandy O’Way ordained by the Intergalactic Cricket Board can do it for me as far as ridding me is concerned of the horror of ‘Carrie’ I provided a little wink.
Fairytale or no and regardless your reminder is helpful to place me bibliographically speaking, it was the huddling that drew for those who engaged in it a degree of comfort (a lass from Italy and one from our neighbourhood with me although I think the fellers might have liked to have moved closer such were the scared sounds they made) and then some transient party goers cheered us by passing and responding to our called hullos. For we were determined to demonstrate not the least fear of passers-by and now were down in the street having joined the loungers at the demolition site (no lounge inside because of renovations… it was the movie space or the highway given I was sharing a 6-bed dorm).
Hulloo, nice night, slurred one returnee who was dropped at the door out of a van with the (we all agreed) scary slogan in the circumstances, “We deliver what we promise.”
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