The Pigs Arms welcomes Mel

The Beach...

Sitting on the red sand, false hope at waves and shark sightings within my braggart persona. Finding my pants lack legs I stand and chase the elegant Harrods mirage to find nothing but a tree stump, chock of woodworm and a large egg with no hints as to origin or future hope of hatching. Shall I scramble? Shall I scamper? I sit and contemplate pants lacking legs and discuss my future with the woodworms, leaving the egg to rest in hope of becoming something new and big and slightly special.

Being warm I discovered the missing clothing appendage. I walked toward the big old green chair stolen from Le Cornu’s foyer and jumped aboard to enjoy the view, Wow, Atlantic Video within paces, think I just may, huge range of retro media. As I leap from the Le Cornu’s monument, I contemplate a name change due to massive overdue fines at every video store in sight upon boarding a Sea World helicopter. Yes, lucky I collected mail from all boxes at the stereotypical cream brick apartment block I call home. At once I settle on Nguyen Ng. Feeling lucky I carry heavy duty hair ties for faux slant eyes.

and the Video, courtesy http://www.starpulse.com

“Okay hero, I seek, Robin Hood Men in Tights, you have on your shelf?” “Sure, never seems to rent out longer than 15 minutes at a time” comes the reply. “Ah sooo – methinks it sounds too good, thank ye sir so much”.     Smile on face I loosen the hair, mmm, normal eyes, so Aryan, yet in a special red headed fashion.

The Royal VN Your Majesty...

Limping across the ochre terrain I locate my pants legs across the windscreen of the VN, well thank God, nothing worse than burning your hands on the plastic economy class steering wheel.

TTG at night, well sort of...pix fotosearch

On to Adelaide. Tea Tree Gully here I come, stun gun and clothesline at the ready. Hey how is it going matey? What do you what… stun gun. Clothesline confines the man to his faux leather home theatre lounge. Hey smarty, big tough man – feast your obnoxious brain on this. Sets the DVD player to repeat –“Nooo, surely my cells shall fry”. “That’s nothing shaghead – tomorrow I’m making you sit through the entire Wogs, Kings of Mykanos [sic]”. He he. Don’t mess with me boy Mel wins.

Mel Nov 2010