Another First Dog on the Moon Classic from Crikey.com.au - DO subscribe if you can
Tony Abbott’s Penis and the Goblet of Fire
16 Tuesday Feb 2010
Posted in The Public Bar
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Window Dresser's Arms, Pig & Whistle %d
yo
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If Abbott gets up at the next election I might take the “Swamp Witch Hattie” road.
You don’t know Hattie?
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x7cowc_jim-stafford-swamp-witch-hattie-hq_music
That should get you started. Sorry about the “Harry Potter” visuals but it’s the only free version of the song I can find with acceptable audio.
I always admired Hattie. She’d had enough, and while she’d help in extremis she didn’t really like the folks in town. I remember when I first heard this song blasting out in the cabin of a cattle truck on it’s way out to Dubbo, the driver was a big Jim Stafford fan, I got the worst case of goosebumps over that last line and fade-away cajun guitar.
Swamp Witch Hattie
Black water Hattie lived back in the swamp
Where the strange green reptiles crawl
Snakes hang thick from the cypress trees
Like sausage on a smokehouse wall
Where the swamp is alive with a thousand eyes
An’ all of them watching you
Stay off the track to Hattie’s Shack in the back of the Black Bayou
Way up the road from Hattie’s Shack
Lies a sleepy little Okeechobee town
Talk of swamp witch Hattie lock you in when the sun go down
Rumours of what she’d done, rumours of what she’d do
Kept folks off the track of hattie’s shack
In the back of the Black Bayou
One day brought the rain and the rain stayed on
And the swamp water overflowed
‘skeeters and the fever grabbed the town like a fist
Doctor Jackson was the first to go
Some say the plague wasa brought by Hattie
There was talk of a hang’n too
But the talk got shackled by the howls and the cackles
From the bowels of the Black bayou
Early one morn ‘tween dark and dawn when shadows filled the sky
There came an unseen caller on a town where road run dry
You’d swear there was found a big black round
Vat full of gurgling brew
Whispering sounds as the folk gathered round
“It came from the Black Bayou”
There ain’t much pride when you’re trapped inside
A slowly sink’n ship
Scooped up the liquid deep and green
And the whole town took a sip
Fever went away and the very next day the skies again were blue
Let’s thank old hattie for sav’n our town
We’ll fetch her from the Black Bayou
Party of ten of the town’s best men headed for Hattie’s Shack
Said Swamp Witch magic was useful and good
And they’re gonna bring hattie back
Never found Hattie and they never found the shack
Never made the trip back in
There was a parchment note they found tacked to a stump
Said don’t come look’n again
I love a song with a yarn. Here’s another one I love. Red Sovine’s original “Phantom 309”. Tom Waits did a good version on “Nighthawks At The Diner”.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVyYrhyqyUY
That skewed off track didn’t it? From conservative politics to cajun and country music.
Of course I blame “Tubby The Tuba” for my fascination with narrative combined with music. And if you’re interested here it is.
http://mp3.xalo.vn/nghebaihat/209774089281/Tubby-The-Tuba~Danny-Kaye.html
Disregard the odd looking Vietnamese site, it begins to play automatically.
I still find this reassuring and calming. I can see the label turning on the old Garard in the sitting room of Green Cottage at Fairbridge.
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I don’t know what’s happening here; I sent a post at 1.38. Usually it’s appears on the forum straight away. I assumed that maybe I had not sent it and and sent another one at 1.47, which appeared immediately…
Ignore one or both, just venting my disappointment in Australian politics.
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I found it in the Spam trap for some reason, Helvi. Who knows ? But the good old spam trap has kept nearly 2,000 pieces of real spam out. Sometimes it also keeps out Hung’s Yos too. Sorry !
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Look in there for one of mine too. It seems to have disappeared into the cyber ether.
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I knew this was coming; Abbott is binning our posts. Could be it’s Rudd; after all he was very ‘disgusted’ with some of Henson’s photographs, wasn’t he.
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It’s SA that’s trying to curtail net critics by promulgating a law that will make it illegal to be critical of the government during the gazetted election period. Bloody unbelievable that crow eaters aren’t up in arms but then no-one ever went broke betting on the complacent stupidity of the Australian electorate. For the most part, present company as always excepted, they are bloody minded sheep lost in their dreams of a consumerist epiphany, if only they can spend fast enough and thoughtlessly enough.
Did you find that lost post MJ? Not that it was all that relevant. It somehow managed to make the segue from conservative politics to cajun and country music and concluded with Tubby The Tuba. Even I can’t remember how or why.
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Conroy should have never risen above the level of a youth organiser, and probably for some cryptically christian sub set of Young Labor. The internet filter is a prime example of what I’m talking about. It’s an idea, a possibility that will play well to people who have little understanding of how the net works and how such a filter might be “fitted” so that it could work. All they want to hear is “less pornography, less child endangerment” and that’s Conroy’s mantra. Mums and dads lapping it up like the cheap sweet politics it is.
Except that it doesn’t work, can’t work.
Kinda like 5% isn’t enough, nowhere near enough, and Wong’s mishandling of the negotiations leading causally to the rise of Abbott. Were they lying to us at the election or are they simply not up to the task?
It’s obvious the LNPC hasn’t got a clue about anything but the internal politics of LNCP preselection and their peerless manipulation of people’s worst fears for short term political gain. Hopeless! A party without any working reason for being except the gaining and maintaining of the government benches. The rest is personal whim based on half arsed interpretations of various deeply Conservative idealogues like Hayek and others whom they mistakenly believe some how philosophically underpin and license their openly fascist program.
Enough moaning, nothing will change until the collapse and then necessity will again be the mother of invention as the human race tries to extract itself, if it can, from the mess it’s made of civilisation. I still live in hope of honest open intelligent government but I won’t hold my breath.
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It’s obvious First Dog has also got the vibe that Abbott is in with a chance at the next election. I have never seen a more disillusioned turn around in a politician’s fortunes in the electorate. Whether up for Abbott or down for Rudd
How is it that any Australian can take Tony Abbott seriously? The answer is simple really; it’s Kevin Rudd. And have you noticed how most of this change seems to be happening quietly. Support for Rudd seems to be ebbing away like a slow tide, while the support for Abbott, like the water collecting in intertidal pools, is warming up and starting to smell fishy.
Elected in an environment of enormous good will, potential promise and a very tractable electorate that only wanted honesty, equity and a focus on facing the challenges, we got spin, slick government advertising and a seemingly endless parade of committees, report authors, think tank submissions, well Rudd style government. And all of this during a time when the LNPC couldn’t get arrested.
It beggars belief. It’s an insult to the intelligence of the Australian electorate. But then that’s so typically Rudd too. He has the hubris and ambition of a first rate mind but the truth is that like so many other politicians, he too has a second rate mind, he’s smart but he still has to spackle the gaps with artifice.
Abbot of course isn’t even that good. He is exactly what he appears to be. Of average to slightly above average intelligence, completely in the thrall of his Catholic God and possibly his frequent private audiences with Pell. (Yes, they are called audiences!) Maybe the years of varsity boxing have left him a little punch drunk but you’ve got to admire his standing firm on some of the more ludicrous positions he’s adapted over the years. Admirable for him, worrying for us.
So where do we go with our vote?
Mad old Spengler was right, I’m beginning to believe. Politics will eat itself before too much longer and then we’ll really see some action.
On a vaguely related note, has anyone been following the emergence of the “Tea Party” group in America?
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Waz, I took time out from some immensely tedious work and I was warmed by your prescient analysis of the state of play.
I can say for a fact that even as a died-in-the-wool lefty (sorry Voice, once a leftie, always a leftie regardless of what that might mean)I am massively disappointed with Labor.
They have a smart team and yet they do such dumb things. Bloody Conroy’s Internet filtering and gift to free-to-air providers. Rudd’s fucking Broadband initiative (what, so we can download ABC shit in real time ?), No progress on the environment front – and the fucking cap and trade scheme rewarding big polluters. Garrett and the insulation and now it appears the solar panels fuck ups. No progress on health reform. Just sorry – no progress on aboriginal health and especially housing.
The boat people debacles.
Education reform – giving kids PCs as a way of getting over a massively unworkable education industry.
Housing housing housing.
Pouring money into Afghanistan.
Rudd had the gall to rest on his laurels over the GFM response.
And the LCP – are just fuckwits – plain and simple. Such a good choice for NSW. Trouble is that the great unwashed masses and even liberal matrons think Tony’s cute even when he consigns them to the ironing board and the nursery.
I agree with your Spengler quote – politics WILL eat itself – and then what ?
I said when we faced yet another Howard government that I was going down to the French Embassy to apply for asylum on the basis that Australia was a rogue state. Time to dust off the old phrase book.
Why is it that Rudd Labor has done such an ordinary job ? Are the public service actively screwing an inexperienced party ? Or is it just plain incompetent after years of Howard abuse.
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Back on the farm, after counting the number of people in the Sydney streets for GEZ 🙂
Whatever I think of Rudd, I just can’t envisage life under Abbott and his heartless clowns.
I’m joining Pauline on the cruise, then heading away from Australia, somewhere, anywhere…
I think Australian immigration problems will be solved; all the thinking people will be queueing to get out.
I better start making definite plans; I’ll have to encourage the family to do the same.
PS. Hearing Abbott on the radio when driving home made be feel nauseous..
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Whatever I think of Rudd, I can’t envisage life under Abbott and his heartless clowns.
I’ll join Pauline on the cruise and then head somewhere, anywhere, away from Australia.
I’m not leaving alone, many a thinking Aussie will be doing the same. Australian immigration/water problems will be solved…
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Here in South Australia its rumored that we will get television soon but I wouldn’t count on it.
We have created some of Australians finest pollies, Nick Minchin, Chrissy Pyne and Alex Downer just to name a few. I mean I’m so proud of that group that I point to them and say to my kids “Boys whatever happens to you in life never end up like them”
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And not only just spackle, but, the ultimate dodgy tradesman trick; using PVA instead of bleed-seal.
Rudd and Abbott, both masters of the stir and paddle the undercoat but no finish coat.
May they both suffer the hardened putty of the future.
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Yes, but who to call on instead? There’s not one of them that’s worth feeding. In fact if I had my way they’d all be minced and fed to the dogs at the RSPCA pound.
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Don’t dare and feed Milo with minced politicians, nor my leghorns. Ok, Waz, just put it in the fox-trap box then.
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