Sandy here, back here on Earth and married to the beautiful Belinda, March 19, ouch, 21, okay, sheez! No need to be so touchy! After a stay in the Regen-O-Bubble on Missen, Helvi and Belinda got rid of the little rodent Howard by blowing the zark out of him with a Waughhead [Thanks Waz,] The girls then did a pub crawl from Andromeda back to the Milky Way. Well, I must say, girls will be girls. Well I sort of wanted to stay on Missen. I had become used to the way of life and well, you know, shiraz, steaks and lots of things that now escape my mammary, er, um, oops, memory.
Anyhoo, Gordon has paid off the ICCB to go and zark off, the S.S. Julian II has rounded up a mighty cast and returned to Earth, yes that’s right Earth home now for Sandy and Belinda, no more space roaming for me. I’m a new man. It was an adventure being out there in space but give me the quiet parish life any day. See priests in my religion can get married. At our church you just insert the name of your God into out text sheet and away you go. No one cares about your views and everyone accepts each others rights to which fictional creature you want to talk to, everyone’s a winner.
Bishop Bishop performed the ceremony at the parish church of St Generic Brand. The post wedding party is at the Pigs Arms. Merve along with Granny and the two Vivienne’s, oh, yes, look the crew have come down for the wedding so we have the situation where like is meeting like, I mean its zarking freaky man, like imagine Voice meeting Catherine!
I look around the crowd and lots of people have turned up. Big M and Pussy Couscous have travelled from Missen. Zig and Zag have come from Zog. Zig wants to begin tours to Earth as Earth men are so easy, if you know what I mean.
It’s funny watching the crew from the S.S Julian II meet the locals at the Pigs Arms. The Vivienne’s don’t seem to be able to agree about cups. Astyages and Dave, the guitar droid, are working on a song list ready to play after the food has gone down. Helvi and the Helvi-tastic are agreeing on everything and everything while GO and Gerard are discussing Van Gough and Wagner. Emmjay and the first mate are swapping brewing techniques with Michael Jones, the publican of the Bats Droppings. Yes there all here. Even Mr and Mrs A are here, looking resplendid as usual and in deep conversation with Geo.r.ge.
I gaze at Belinda. She is beautiful beyond reproach. I am the lucky guy, I’ve won my lotto. Belinda has all her sisters for bridesmaids, Glenda, Juanita, Jacinta, Melinda, Rosita, Edwina , Sophia and Cassandra. Boy, am I going to have some birthday parties to go to, well, someone’s gotta do it.
I see Gordon, you know Gordon O’Donnell the creator of the universe, he has been busy having a few pints of Trotter’s Ale and approaches me. “Sandy, you old dog, got the pick of the bunch with young Miss Belinda” proffers Gordon, pulling back on a Café Crème “Yes, she’s a dish for sure Gordon” I answer rather distractedly as Gordon’s eyes have narrowed and he has grabbed me around the shoulder and pulled me in close to him. Is he batting for the other team? I think to myself “Sandy, look old chum there’s just one thing. I enrolled in uni next year and I need some help……”
[Authors note: Sandy was last seen in the back of an ambulance, in a white coat heading for the funny farm, yelling at the top of his lungs “PPPPPPPPPPPPPPiiiiiiiiiiiiiggggggggggsssssss in ssssssspppppppppaaaaaaaaaaacccceeeeee.]
And the crowed erupts as our hero makes his way back to the pavilion. Seldom if ever in the annals of cricket have we seen such a consummate display of technique, a lesson in the art of the game. His name will certainly be inscribed in Wisden for may years to come. We can only hope that as he takes this well deserved rest from the crease that we haven’t seen the last of the little master from Adelaide.
Thet’s raght Retchie. A true morster of the gem.
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Smacks, it through the covers, all the way to the boundary, cracking shot that
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Yeah, me and the droid got the songlist worked out; we’ll start of ‘Spirit in the Sky’, followed by ‘Strawberry Fields’, ‘Buffalo Soldier’, ‘Woodstock’, ‘Sunshine Superman’, ‘Lean on Me’, ‘Brown-Eyed Girl’, ‘Sugar Man’, ‘Late-Night Science-Fiction Double Feature’, and end up with the ‘Time Warp’… appropriate don’t you think?
Hope you’ve got that anti-humming device for the bass amp… We’re about ready to start but I think it’d be better to wait ’till the crowd have finished eating and are settling themselves back with a drink; otherwise we won’t be heard… we’ve still only got 40 watt amps!
Great jam on Sunday Hung… and it was fun playing a Fender Stratocaster for the first time too… Looking forward to hearing what you’ve made of the recordings; have you kept the original files? I’ve decided I wouln’t mind hearing them after all…
🙂
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Astyages, The recording didn’t end up taking as long as I expected so next time we can record the whole jam. Going better to better.
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Looking forward to hearing last weeks production, Hung, and to making some more new noises on Sunday! We’ll make Chi Lei’s party look tame!
😉
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A party at the Pigs Arms, Granny will be pleased! Just don’t upset Merv, you heard what Waz did to him?
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He was the one that shot at me remember, jeez! I’ve still got the scarred left hand to prove it. Mind you, me and Merve went pig shooting up the Pilliga a few weekends ago. That Purdey of his is a ball tearer for birds!
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That’s not what Merve says!
I think a Purdey would tear more than just the balls.
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Thanks for coming to the wedding party Mark, all the way from Missen 🙂
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Wouldn’t missen it for the world, or the universe.
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