Some experts reckon that people’s genes and hormones determine more than anything else what kind of life they are destined to live. Upbringing and parenting is a mere bus stop on the way to maturity and a wise old age.

We all know that relationships are as important as well as jobs, wealth and health. Sadly for many, relationships can often become the banana skin on the doorstep of a smooth entry to maturity and old age. The statistics and thousands of Family court enforced Orders testify that love have many a rough edge. In fact, it could be a sobering experience and perhaps educational as well, for intending relationship contenders to spend a day in a Divorce Court especially the Family Court. Just don’t do what I did, in the lift to the eight’s floor, and hum, “Love and Marriage is like a horse and carriage, etc”. I was lucky to get out alive. A security guard was in the lift.

 If fridges, cars or TV’s had failure rates approaching even a fraction of relationship breakdowns there would be a thorough investigation by Consumer Affairs. Choice Magazine would come out with dire warnings with lots of arrows and downwards pointing graphs and 1800 preventative phone help lines for those that have been conned into a relationship. MP’s would line up with legislation proposing to ban any relationships, but perhaps excluding friendly pets… Those that organize weddings with lavish exhibitions costing tens of thousands of dollars would be chased out of Australia. In fact there would be a law against it and anyone who as much as looked as if having a relationship would be hauled into the paddy wagon.

This is why it is the more so puzzling that even in old age people don’t seemed to have learnt a lesson. There is a very good publication out, far exceeding the newsworthiness of the Sydney Morning Herald or The Australian which is called “The Senior.” It is a revolution in honest reportage and I recommend it with gusto.  If ever there is proof that people, despite all the previously suffered discombobulating relationships, despite all the battles fought with partners, the relentless hounding through courts seeking compliance of Orders and percentages, they can never get enough of it.

 Here a sample of the length that some will go to in order to hitch up with some new partner. From “The Senior.”

LOOKING FOR ME?
Gent finally divorced for 15 months. Very young for 89, honest, considerate, GSOH, 69kgs, 168cm, ND, NS, NG. No vices & no ties, just a small fish tank with guppies. Like animals, the outdoors & home life, the garden, healthy food & living, car trips, music, dancing, tennis, current affairs & business news, reading, conversations. I WLTM a compatible lady, around 50s & 60s, active, slim-med., some similar interests, including oral (dentures); for friendship with VTPR. Love to hear from you. Let’s enjoy life!

There we have it.  At 89 and still the unstoppable search for yet another partner, no matter what.

Of course, there are also the untold millions for whom it was ‘bingo’ first time around and while the above points out the negatives for the unwary or the ill prepared, there are just as many whom have sailed through life with just a single partner. The perfect loving relationship was found the first time they laid eyes on each other across the vast ocean of available humanity of people keen to hop-a-long with someone else. Volumes, whole libraries have been written about what makes certain people find lifelong love while others plod along from breakup to endless breakups and Court after Court without ever finding what they so keenly seek.

 Some experts give answers about unreal expectations that many seem to hold. Endless love without a hint of a hitch or slackening of sex… A dreamy tear stained reality as so often portrayed in those American TV series where no one ages and huge houses are filled with impossible bunches of flowers with lovers straining at each other within the acreages of beige coloured boudoirs with a never ending and reckless abandonment into the arms of total perfection, year in year out. Who knows?

Perhaps it is more of a case of A Horse and Carrots.