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By Sandshoe
I moved with an even attention to not raising the alarm of the many eyes I believed were watching the trespass and tugged at Docherty’s boots as they manipulated frantic purchase on the sill of the entrance into the grass hut. The distinctive difference of the hut on stilts Docherty had run towards and deftly up its ladder was its higher elevation. He had in the same movement pushed athletic bulk in the dense black of the narrow entrance. A crescendo of murmurings suggested to me the compound’s native inhabitants in the likely proximity I had interpreted from eerie silence as Docherty and I approached just ahead of the others the red dirt track leading down to the settlement and grove of cultivation.
I supposed Docherty could not hear the murmuring in his scrabble part-inside and part-out of the construction. His legs and rubber-soled boots seemed to be pushing him inwards. Thick woven walls and his excitement doubtless insulated him from eruption of noise in any exterior world. The sound of the voices cackled in my mind with the danger I had sensed in the surround of tall native grass clumps and straggling palms and trees. These were people who had not seen the full potential of a white invasion I wondered. Their tones sounded referential, consultative rather than rabidly murderous. They might slit our throats with some polite justification if Docherty did not withdraw himself out of the hut I considered.
Only three ancient elders sitting in rock-like silence on a bench in the centre of the compound, about a quarter of the distance from the circular wall of huts where it bowed away neatly from our line of sight where we had entered the arena suggested habitation. The red ground of the compound beneath our feet that I supposed was tramped by generations into a compacted floor was so bare of debris it appeared fresh-swept. The rock-like silence endured of the elders and I wondered as I glanced discretely towards the row of men if they could speak. I supposed the venerables were left behind by the fleeing men, women and children who it was seeming had abandoned their village at the sound of our progress along the track from the landing strip on the edge of that high mountain place. The elders looked fragile, skeletal, but sighted or not seemed observant in their still demeanours and I drew the sense of their strength, their respect into a reservoir of belief I may be saved as I reached to grasp Docherty’s boots again.
We flew to the location in a plane that was chartered as result of a chance conversation in the Port Moresby Club. Docherty, buying up big and ferrying trays of exotic liquers he was insistent those who had never experienced them try got into a confrontation with a patron it transpired was a pilot scheduled to fly to keep an appointment in the Central Highlands the next day (He said it was social; a Saturday afternoon piss-up we surmised later). You will see natives, he assured Natural Ringleader Docherty loudly, Good Fun, Loveable Docherty, waving a dismissive hand at suggestion danger was involved. He would fly a little earlier than he intended, that was all. We could do whatever we wanted on arrival at his destination as long as he was left to his own devices and we meet him at the scheduled time for the return flight. If you don’t, the pilot warned, I’ll leave you on the mountain. On our arrival, he waved us in a direction opposite to his own.
Tugging sharply on Docherty’s right boot, I realised as equally as I did there was little danger for us in the original environment, that a sense they were in danger had begun crowding the natives from their hiding places. Big Docherty was used to being in charge. He needed strong persuasion to reverse his impulsive lunge. I said firmly, “Docherty, get out. You’re trespassing. This is the private property of these people.”
“No, No” I heard the muffled voice declare as if the magnification of the soul of an hypnotic, “There’s something in here. I want to see. I’ve got a match. I’ll light a match.”
I reached further into the dark cool and commanded by a combination of touch and tone that Docherty get out.
“You’re in danger. We all might be.”
I could hear the grasses rustling more loudly and rhythmically. The rising crescendo of murmuring was louder because it was drawing nearer. I just knew, although there was no sound of feet on the earth or on twigs or fallen palm branches.
“Everybody’s out,” Docherty had casually commented when we arrived on the edge of the mountain overlooking where its slope fell sharply on one side into a ravine and to a glimpse of the peaks ahead of huts in a circle. I was awed by the silence as we looked down on the splendid array of bright-leaved fronds and tropical bushes interspered with palms. “The people are hiding,” I said, instinctive, young, sensitive, attuned immediately to the meaning of the sound of a silence I had never experienced before and cherished for knowing. The air was crystal-glare. Despite our elevation and the sun was near enough its height, on exertion the heat was a swelter. It was air stripped nevetheless of the extreme stress of the sweltering heat of Moresby.
The bareness of the red-brown earth of the compound was a striking monochrome of colour in a rich mix of hues of green beyond the circle of this evidence of residential life.
As if a light had come on in Docherty’s head deep in the hut’s interior, Docherty’s head popped out of the black mouth of the hut. Docherty to my surprise looked mildly confused by himself, as if he was even grateful if he was to about to be slaughtered it would be from a standpoint of a renewed consciousness of realism. Having shown not the least consideration of fearful possibilities, possibilities seemed to be occurring to Docherty in a rush like the onset of a sudden tropical downpour of rain that is heralded by an atmosphere of pure swelter. Beads of moisture glistened in the sun that was falling over him like an illuminator of lost dreams, his face changed in the same thought to a sense of hope in contrast to sense of loss. I suppose he suffered hell. I supposed he thought of his one child in the States who he told me on our group chartered flight from Cairns was home in the States. That was my first experience of hearing the word “weed” and what was meant as he told me his despair his son preferred it to law school and described its effects. No Doubt Docherty as he scrabbled off the ledge of the hut now considered his own status, a now common trespasser attested by the extra tinges of pink flaring through the tan of his affluent and untrammelled face. The murmurings of the voices like the presage of a mob moving closer had remained uniform as if the same words and similar were being repeated by different people under the direction of a conductor of an invisible choir of voices reciting an orchestrated sound symphony. I had just finished High School. I was 17 and it was three months before I heard a choir perform an acapella sound poem I heard as a similar musical effect. As instantly as Docherty exited the hut, the music of the voices faded and fell to a low volume before rising to a cacophonic babble. Docherty flared red above his light cotton round neck t-shirt.
“What will we do?” he asked me.
I said lightly and pleasantly, accepting my leadership as survival, turning, looking at Docherty over my shoulder, “We walk back the way we came. Follow me.”
Docherty followed me to where the others waited ashen-Docherty greeted his wife shame-faced and she gathered him-and I walked with an easy stride indicating “Follow”. Everybody seemed to realise the safety cue I might best be seen with the red sun leaping through my hair as a young heroine leading Docherty away from dangerous mischievousness. We walked towards the narrow gap between two huts the way we had entered the compound. The silence that fell of the invisible people who lived here and had fled I was sure from their homes at the sound of our approach reassured. It meant we were free to leave. The sun etched a mottle on the trail through the vegetation when I glanced back where the huts described their edge around the circle of trodden red soil that was flat and occupied again only by the three old men I now did discern on the bench seat. I would never know them. We walked across to the red-dirt earth of the hill track we had followed down the mountain to the village and the sun blasted its heat on the steep aspect of the hill as we climbed to its top.

yo
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Sandshoe, ‘yo’ from HOO implies that he read the story and quite liked it!
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Hoo goes to a fair bit of trouble Big M, then. Thanks for the steer. There was I thinking it like a tick at the end of the homework essay in the exercise book-roighto, read that one.
Thank you, Big M. Thank you, Hoo.
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yo yo
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That’s something with a bit of string in the middle isn’t it Hung.
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Walking the dog?
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Around the world?
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Church steeple?
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Cats cradle?
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the Sunday roast?
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Tom Cruise?
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Belfrey. Very alarming. Like a Napsack. (Not a Potato sack, geez).
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Algernon, I assume now I gather myself you were wondering if the character might be Tom Cruise in the T-.
I don’t know if Tom would throw himself unannounced and uninvited through the front door of someone’s weapons arsenal, skull room, or yam cupboard but I think he certainly might play such a role and enjoy giving it a go. For impulsivity you have it in the cup exactly however.
As the writer I will ask for someone with a burlier aspect than Tom and a little older, with a conservative crew-cut. (Perhaps someone even out there whose moniker is Tom Cheap Charter Flight, somehow Tom Cruise sounds more of a box office 🙂
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I read this on Tuesday, in post-night shift sleep deprived haze. It was too rich. Like Duck L’Orange at a picnic, or drinking Moet at the pub. Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes, was, by contrast, light and spare in his descriptions, so satisfied the hunger for words with one of his short stories.
Such rich descriptions. I felt the heat and the humidity, the sweat drenched shirt stuck to my back, whilst that over-riding threat of danger, coupled with the feeling that we were all somehow trespassing, treading through someone else’s domain.
A toast to ‘shoe!!
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Gee, Big M, how amazing to have the capacity to write the guts of the negatives and the positives in such a riveting way.
“… coupled with the feeling that we were all somehow trespassing.”
You right with googs? I’ll see if I can ask Merv to make up one of those egg-nogs. I heard he put together a beauty for the Nugga Warra Billarburra Festival championship over at the Creek. You’re an inspiration no wonder. 😉
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Sandshoe, they say that the devil’s in the details. I think it’s more that the ability of the writer to describe those subtle details, in the way that you have, is what transforms a simple written description into a literary work, that transports the reader straight into the narrative.
P.S Got plenty of googs, three this morning, except the dog was found to be very carefully lifting them out so that he could lick the inside of the container. Don’t worry, I washed ’em!
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PS ‘shoe, I’ll buy you a Schoohie, when we next meet.
Sorry, we et the bumnuts for dinner!
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I really meant it sincerely Big M-nevertheless-when I commented on the way you wrote your critique of the story. I thought I would pop back to write a little how this story was written.
It was a few years ago the rudiments were set down. As it turned out, they did not see light in anybody else’s day or night, but I was writing to stay ahead of a situation that meant I had to continuingly prove I could write, not having “the book” for ‘The Writer’s Tent’. I had scraps of this and that, and in this style and that, or so I hoped, M. And I was fed up with using a computer keyboard as the tool so had pulled out exercise books to write with a biro an equivalent to Manning Clark’s History of Australia.
I got bored with that idea (writing with a biro) and next, I feared transporting scraps of paper every time I moved house. In a robotic frenzy typed the scraps up and forgot about them, the circumstance, that I ever had to any kind of satisfaction written a yarn. Not that I knew.
What would I contribute next to The Pigs Arms after ‘The Volunteer’ was next incentive these years later. I went searching through files. I found it, I was surprised, I was interested to read I had pitched to create a condensed short story in a flashback style, but no-one is more astounded that it seemed ‘enough’, complete. I was so worn out I now think trying to for the first time write this style I thought I had spent futile time.
Just between you and me, I edited this before I sent it to Mike as a lapidiarist might attempt to polish a rock face to display it. I was pretty well bemused I could write anything this green and red and hot. That’s the truth. (Thanks for listening.)
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I think a Schoohie is something like a Bunyip. In idle moments I wonder maybe an inner for a Dr Scholls sandal.
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It reminds me a bit of Wagner’s Ring Cycle. An epic performance almost beyond endurance, till of course, one comes to the dance of the Valkyries when the whole place just goes into a trance and you feel like giving Brunhilde a jolly good valkeren in the woods behind a solid oak tree. Who cares if the Nibelungen are hiding somewhere between the verdant ferns.
May the words keep tumbling. Well done Sandshoe.
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Quite tricky writing the potential of poetic sensuality and rhythm. Ring Cycle. I felt that in a sense when I stepped back from the canvas. Wagner. I can hear and see that, maybe from my view Dvorak and Peter Sculthorpe’s ‘Sun Music’- ‘Beads of moisture glistened in the sun that was falling over him like an illuminator of lost dreams, his face changed in the same thought to a sense of hope in contrast to sense of loss.’ ‘The air was crystal-glare’.
Thank you, Gerard. I appreciate that.
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I meant also to add that the “atmospherics” are simply enchanting!
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Excellent writing, sandshoe.
I felt as if I were there, alongside you and Docherty, sneaking around the place where the three venerable ancients were seating.
Delightfully expansive descriptions that begin with a simple and innocent explanation, only to spread across a wide campus: “attuned immediately to the meaning of the sound of a silence I had never experienced before and cherished for knowing. ”
You understand and explain to the reader that there are many different sounds of silence and that you have cherished the fact you now got to know this particular silence. Hugely perceptive. A most acute sense of sound and an understanding that silence, too is a sound of some sort. The sentence had me awestruck!
And then the delightful eerie sharpness of the contradiction of emotions in this sentence: “They might have slit our throats with some polite justification.”
And then, too, your description of the location is stunning. One example of this stopped me on my tracks: “The bareness of the red-brown earth of the compound was a striking monochrome of colour in a rich mix of hues of green beyond the circle of this evidence of residential life.”
Again that lovely sharp contrast of vision. Words like “bareness” and “striking monochrome” send the reader’s eyeballs in one direction but then are tugged back in another direction with “rich mix of hues of green” all in the one sentence. Good stuff.
Actually, the moment you’ve mentioned you were 17 at the time of this little exploration my mind went back to a book I read when I was probably about 10. It was written by Alexander Dumas and it was called -in Greek- “The fifteen-year old captain.” I never found it in English translation so I don’t know what it would be called in this language but it was about a 15 year old boy who, in the end, had to lead a group of men and women lost in the jungles of some African country the name of which now escapes me. It was probably a very racist book and that’s why it may not have been reprinted but it was quite exciting for a 10 year old boy to read. Your story has the same sort of sense of adventure and mystery, of peeking into other cultures, other landscapes, other characters.
Many thanks.
Merv! A glass of whatever this lady wants, please! Put it on my tab!
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Atomou, thank you in particular for your critical appreciation of my sentence describing “The bareness of the red-brown earth of the compound was a striking monochrome of colour in a rich mix of hues of green beyond the circle of this evidence of residential life.”
It could be even better, but its rough edge gives it an authenticity. The triumph is always known to the writer, mostly only … it rests for me in setting the (a bit astonishing to me) words describing the compound in ‘a rich mix of hues of green’ and then conceiving I would expand the sentence further and that potential of it. I am humbly truly grateful and rewarded by your troubling to write your joyous description.
I have learned such an amount from what you have written in your critique, Atomou. It has among other things led me to self examine my understanding of silence, the meaning of sounds, yes, I forget these things and the source of them sometimes and you are so accurate. I am very rewarded. Thank you. And thanks for the drink on your tab, Ato. I will probably give Merv a hoy Saturday arv for that. 😉
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My bill is in the mail, ‘shoe!
No, honestly, I loved it. Different lenses see different things in different ways. Different ear drums do the same thing. They hear different sounds in different ways.
Your story makes the readers aware and respectful of these differences; broadens their appreciation of their senses. It’s pretty much the mission of every writer but not every writer, of course, either accepts this mission or is capable of delivering its fruits.
I’ve enjoyed everything about your story. Excellently done. As an ex-teacher, I give you ten-out-of-ten. If we were in Greece, I’d give you ten out-of-ten with an accent!
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