Foodge, fart arsing around as usual


Wow, I’m overwhelmed. Anyway Foodge was worried because all of his bag men had delivered to the right political party, if you get my nuance. Now it looks like they is gunna friggin lose the election. Best way to check how an election is gunna go you ask some of the patrons or even better you get Merv to do it.

“Hey patrons?” questions Merv.

“Fuck off, yes, wheeze responsible, past the bong Hung?” says Gib W.

“Pint’s all round on Gordon” cries Merv.

“Just one thing, whoose is ya votin for? You can earn a quick fiver here” continues our eternal barman.

“The sum of the square of the something equals the some of the square of something else” interjects Gerard, trying to raise the bar a bit in the debate. Worked beautifully on this crowd.

“I’m voting for good manners, fair hearts and equally to all, now where’s that fucking pint,” Angler On seizing the moment.

Mucho laughter.

“That quip was brought to you by Tindneo, Tindneo Tindneo Tindneo, the game book_him_danothat always let you win much dough dough, dah, dah, dah” sings a robot flown in for the gig at Gordon’s expense. Fancy that, a walking talking pokie machine, for gawds sake, whats next. Serves beer as well oh yes, bring it on, oops, sorry, now the rest of the story,

“I’m voting for Fuck All” says Nurse Barbara ” that way we all win, we get sweet FA and they will know SFA”

“It’s the gubbermint trying to put down the gubbermint, oops, working arses, um classes, what did I mean anyone know?” enquires Hung. “Anyway pass the bootleg?”

“I’m voting for Politicians who Stitch their Arses Up Party. Some say they are one platform but wow, Id like to see that plus their shoes, hmm, if ya know what I mean and their tight little bums and their big d…[Okay Yvonne: Mark here, too much flirting causes an author alert]” purrs Yvonne, finally wearing some clothes, even though it’s only a scarf.

“Wheel” says Gib W “How about the Purse Carrying Nancy Boys Party!”

“Purfect” cry the rest, all the hard decisions over, over to the bar for a few ales and a pizza and just forget about life for a while.

Hmm, I think I can hear grass growing…, thinks someone.

Lahmacun-(turkish-pizza) Courtesy: SBS Food

Lahmacun-(turkish-pizza) Courtesy: SBS Food