Foodge and Merv


Foodge was looking pensive, no worried, no pensive. Hang on, make your effing mind up and decide. Is Foodge pensive or worried? Who are you? Me? Yes you? Dunno, anyway pensive Foodge was worried about Merv. Ewe no, if I can keep this up, I can see that pensive may take over from ennui or even worse, yo.

Ever since Merv got his mobile phone all he does is walk around all day with his head down, looking at the phone. It seemed so incredibly marvelous that he devoted all of his time to his new toy.

“What’s the time?” says Foodge, hoping for some sort of reasonable answer.

“Dunno” replies Merv.

“What about your fancy purse carrying nancy boy toy Merv?” retorts Foodge.

“Piss off dick, get it, dick, Foodge the private dick, ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah” Merv says politely.

“Wot’s all this about?” spurts Sister Yvonne.

“Well, Merv has this new modern contraption called a mobile phone and he cannot take his eyes off it to save his life” informs Foodge.

Sister Yvonne grabs Merv’s phone.

“Merv, this isn’t even turned on you bozo, what the are you looking at?”

“Well look at this.” Merv shows Sister Yvonne a reflection of himself in the screen area of his phone.

“Well get my donkey, have you been whisking the primate?” interjects Nurse Barbara as she chews on barbecued goat’s testicles on a stick, downs a pint and sucks a fag, yes, everyone, this is what multi-tasking is really all about.

“Ask Gib W to fix it, he nose dem fings” says Angler, fresh from holidays, tanned and relaxed although a little bit windy, maybe one to many tacos perhaps, or was it sailing? hmm.

“I’m on knight shit, I work at night and it is shit. I’m not available in this dialogue. Please direct any other enquries to Box XYZ in your capital city” replies Gib.

“Shit, piss, fuck” roar the crew.

[Can anyone contact the author? Having trouble, square brackets are supposed to do it]

[Hmm, cough, snort, cough, more coughing, get the picture, what?]

Foodge in the meanwhile decided to give up looking pensive or worried to the point of ennui.

[Interval music]

Now, while we are taking a break here I

[Sorry, I was taking a break. Even writers need a break.]

[[Sorry, I was taking a break]]

[[[Really, really sorry, I was taking a break…]]]

Ennui any one?