Hmm, Duck

Hmm, dem duck down dere…

By hph and Mark

(ring ring)
(ring ring)

(ring.. Mark answers the phone)

Mark: “Yeah who duck is this?’

Hph: “It’s me hph..”

Mark: “What the duck do you want?”

Hph: “Mark, I need your help. You gotta help me!”

Mark: “Yeah! What the duck did you do this time you duckhead?”

Hph; “Mark, I’m in the shit!”

Mark: “You’re always in shit you shithead”

Hph: “No Mark, this time I’m in the REAL shit.”

Mark: “Real or not you’re always in shit.”

Hph: “Mark listen to me… I am in a tank full of real shit”

Mark: “Get the duck outta here.”

Hph: “That’s what I’m trying to do Mark help me”


Duck on a stick, hmm

Duck on a stick, hmm

Duck McDuck here. These are the kinda calls wheeze get at Duck Central, day in day out.

The Mark guy is a fictitious being somehow connected to Gordon, the creator of the Universe.

Me, I believe in jack shit so Gordon sounds fine.



Here’s some more of the conversation,

Mark: “Yes I can help you, for sure, just sign here.”

Hph: “Hey Mark, why have you put my last name as Sauce?”

Mark: “Well, Hph, I hadda put somefink, ewe no, HPH Sauce, hmm.”HPsauce

Hph: “What about Loronzo or Emmintal?”

Mark: “Oh for Gordon’s sake, lets see what happens in the next bit of the story.”


Yes, I’m back, Duck McDuck. So did you learn anything from that exchange? Nah, me neither.

In my role as private investigator I get to see many things. This is some of the things I had to witness,






Yes shocking I know.

Back to the interrogation,

Hph: “Well, I’d like to be called Bill Smith.”

Mark: “WFT, er TFW, nah, FWT, hang on, I’ll get it in a minute, WTF?”

Hph: “Yes, that was my uncles second cousins aunt’s maiden name, middle name Gloria but I just want to be called John Citizen.”

Mark: “Um, yes. What happened to Bill Smith?”

Hph: “Who?”


Hmm. And so it goes.