Merv was pleased to be reversing the old EH Special into the Pigs Arms garage, but was still bloody cranky with Janet. The usual story, they’d blued, she cried, called him a bastard, he told her to fuck right off, which she did with the kids. Now she’s staying out at Buttfuck West with ’Her People’. He’d done the right thing, driven up, bought real good flowers from the servo and a bottle of Porphyry Pearl from the grog shop. I won’t record the anatomical locations Janet had instructed Merv to relocate his well thought out gifts. Anyhoo, Merv was well buggered after a long drive.

“Welcome back Mr Merv, didja buy yerself a Mickey Mouse shirt when you were out West?” O’Hoo took a break from pressure cleaning the cement path.

“It’s not Mickey Mouse, it’s just Man…