Digital Mischief by Warrigal Mirriyuula

In one of those rare Austro-American seeing eye-to-eye sessions, the great super hero puts the hard word on his trusty sidekick.

Big O:  Look, Robin, you’re bustin’ my arse.

Little R: I aint bustin yo arse, Kimo Sabe.  I’s in a jam.  We’s got big trouble with dem Afghan voles.

Big: Aint no trouble with dem voles, Tonto.  Yo with the Lone Arranger.  The Biggest O.  All I’s askin’ you is to cough up a couple hundred thou troops.  We needs to do a flush or whatsit called ?  A ramp-up, my man.

Little: I got no thou troops, Your huge O-ness.  I be busted flat as a fart in church, man.  No Way can I ante-up the dosh to score us a reggie or two, man.  And anyways, like my tribe has taken to hollow logs every time I jez thinks about it.

Big: Look, my man.  Big Tony is Toast.  Big Gordy is doin a gig over at Hung’s post, and so when we throws the towel in on the G8  and we has to put up with these other dudes from God knows where – Bosutoland or whatever- so YOU, MY MAN can has a seat at the table – the G20 table – you goes an pikes on yo big Daddy !

Little: Like I’m way embarrassed, your highness.  I offerd you the Big Beaze.  Gee, man, he like even looks like your tribe man.  110% all beef pattie.  Like I mean, Your Immensity, he be the most linebacker I’s got.

Big: Listen to me, my diminuitive rodentiousness.  Can I put it more plainer than I be about to speak it to you ?  Either yo goes and stumps up yo part of the deal, or it is, you see that the size of the G is maybe suffering a 5% cut.  Like I’m talkin’ G19.  Are yo travellin’ with yo big Bro, as Im talkin down you hearin’ tubes,  my good Robinaceous manlet ?

Little: I’s hearin you, Oh one of great Awesomeness.  An I wuz jes wonderin’….

Big: Well ?

Little: Be there available a kind of hench type seat, just off the main gig an a little bit to the leff ?

Big: Are we talkin’ yos askin’ me for a waiter job at the G ?  Or are you thinkin’ of sum othha walk-on part ?

Little: Ummmm, G.  I umm, I arr, needless to say, the arr Umm …….. would I get scraps ?

Big: Yo already got the Afghan scraps I give you.  How much of mor of dem does you want, my main marsupial ?

Little: I has another angle, Oh one Ohbie !  I has climate change left overs.  Would you like a developing country for afters ?

Big: Listen’ I got stuff to do.  Big stuff, like I Ran as well as I raq and now I got dis China thing comin on. I’ll be seein’ yo.

…. (aside)  coz right now I don have a Swiss knife wiv a thing for gettin Antewhatsis off of my superhero shoe.