Until a day or so ago, I can truthfully say I had never heard of Mark Papermaster.
You too ? I thought so.
The Papermaster had been an employee of IBM for over 26 years. He was first a circuit designer then a chip designer with parentage of the PowerPC chip. It is said that it took two years of negotiations and a lot of anti-competitive legal agreement wrangling for Steve Jobs to wrest him from the bosom of Big Blue to take charge of the division building the new Apple iPhone.
If you read the technology section of the press or the web – or heaven forbid, if you have purchased a new iPhone version 4, you will know that this latest incarnation of a piece of previously legendary technology is a bit of a lemon. Well, a really big bit. The whole citrus shebang, really.
The problem is apparently that the aerial design is crook and that when you hold the thing it loses between a half and a third of its ability to engage with the signal. Not good for a hand held device that chews data transmission capacity at a prodigious rate. This was well known and Twitted incessantly well before the beast hit the streets in Australia.
Yet …. And this I find truly bizarre, people actually queued overnight outside Apple stores the night before its release to part with hundreds of dollars of their hard-earned – to be the first to buy a defective product with less utility to that of the model it was slated to replace. Truly amazing. Baa, Baa, Baa.
But we DO that sort of thing really a lot of the time, don’t we ? Of course we do ! Sucked in by nice external appearance, I decided to try before buying the cheapest version of the “Ultimate Driving Machine” – a BMW 318i. I had owned two of the bikes when I was younger and appreciated beautiful and excellent German engineering. But (forgive me here 318i owners), I made the mistake of taking a rented one across the Blue Mountains – that pathetic excuse for a chain of hills running down the East Coast. I had to wring its neck to keep up with ordinary cars costing a third as much as the cheapest Beemer. Gutless. Marketing hype with maintenance and service costs greater than the Tasmanian GDP.
Apple products look beautifully designed too and like Volvo’s legendary safety credentials, Apple’s boxes are the gold standard for ease of use.
When they work.
They may be so often gutless like the little Beemer, but they ARE easy to use in a modest kind of self-conscious way. However this little Apple’s modesty extended right into being too shy to connect well to to the G3 network.
But true to its marketing hype, Apple stepped up to their responsibility to do the right thing, not by redesigning the crook bit and undertaking a product recall, but by handing out free bandaids – rubber cases to reduce, but not fix the defect.
And they acted decisively by scapegoating and sacking Mark Papermaster – disproving the old aphorism that the papermate was mightier than the sword.
Well done, Steve Jobs. Sweet as. I’m off to check out the HTC and Samsung competitor products (whom I gather Apple is suing for alleged product patent infringements….). or I’ll wait until iPhone 4.5 or so comes out and a bunch of tech heads tell me that this one works.

I like our Telstra G3 mobile phones. The women have had one for quite some time and finally gave dad/husband one for his birthday two years ago. Teaching him how to use it was another matter so it is basically a phone for emergencies. And it is a relief. He has emergencies – last one was a flat tyre out woop woop (ran over a piece of metal which totally slashed and stuffed a very expensive tyre). He rang to let me know what had happened and he would be very late home. Had to put spare ‘temporary’ tyre on with some difficulty and drive slowly to nearest town but the real tyre was beyond repair so had very slow trip home.
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Clearly EmmJay holds Apple products with great disdain. I use an iMac, as I was sick of the go-damned piece of shit PC losing data etc etc. As for iPhone, iPads, etc, I can’t see the attraction. I can barely be bothered answering the landline, let alone the mobile (except recently, with old folks dementing). I certainly can’t be bothered replying to text messages. What an idiotic way to communicate, with a half arsed little keyboard (the querty I’m using now isn’t much better!). Don’t know what the f&^ I’d do with an iPad???
So, a convoluted way of saying, I fully concur, Emm!!
By the way, my work just changed the email programme because the old one couldn’t talk to the iphone programme, and the iphone users didn’t like the extra step of accessing the internet to use webmail!!!
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The iPhone is gorgeous. I saw one that someone brought over from the US when you still had to do a hack to use them here. But I don’t have one as I have no real use for it and if I bought every gorgeous thing I had no use for, I’d soon be broke.
Fortunately my stylish little Apple laptop earns me money. Now they run Windows they are a good investment.
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A quart of Trotter’s for T2, a genllman of obvious perspicacity, redolent of common sense and sensible discrimination who has echoed most uncannily my innermost thoughts about the whole “mobile” phenomenon.
Hic!
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Slange!
🙂
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Oy cuncorrr!
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Shore, dat’s a foin Belfast brogue you halve there, Big M… d’ye hail from the Emerald Isle at all yersel’?
😉
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Awnly win entocksykayted.
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You’re just jealous you don’t have an iPhone. 🙂 No, I’m getting confused. It’s me who’s jealous. Actually, being cheap I tend to wait for new technology to hit a price and reliability point, unless there is a strong reason not to wait (such as my old technology equipment having died in the meantime). Usually by then it also has a few very useful improvements.
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I must admit, Voice, that since my accident I have been feeling slightly guilty about not having a mobile phone (sorry Tomo!) as I must admit I was very glad that at least one of the witnesses did; and more importantly in my case mercifully stopped to help rather than just to take photos for the ‘net… as I hear is now sometimes the case…
I try to make whatever I’ve got last and I’m both poor and old-fashioned enough to understand the value of frugality, so I agree with your ‘upgrade only when you have to’ policy. But I see no use for mobile phones whatsoever really, except for, I must grudgingly admit, their usefulness in an emergency… Anyway, I have a house phone and these days I hardly ever go anywhere so there still seems too little point to justify the expense; and I dread the kind of trap Gez fell into!
So I think I can resist the temptation a while longer; so Tomo, you needn’t think I’m weakening at all…
😉
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Yes, my mother finally got a mobile phone after she’d been in an accident when my parent’s car went off the road down a hill, and they was rescued after a passer-by called triple-zero on his mobile.
She refuses to use it though.
If it’s not useful for you, don’t get one. I find it incredibly irritating if I have to meet people who don’t have a mobile, if there is a delay.
These days a basic mobile costs peanuts and you can get basic use (mostly incoming calls) for peanuts. Also you can call emergency for free even when you have no credit.
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Gee Emmjay, tell us how you really feel 🙂
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Emmjay, when I read comments like those in your article, it makes me very, very glad that I have thus far managed to consistently refuse the temptation to join the so-called ‘mobile phone’ culture; if such a beast is not oxymoronic…
I’m sure it’s one of the best decisions I ever made…
😉
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