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An Apologia after the Psalm 141
Oink for Deliverance from the Wicked
by Sandshoe.
Dinkum, mate, I have to ask; get a wriggle on; (reprise) it’s as if he’s deaf, believe me.
I’m not just a bad smell; my uplifted hands an evening sacrifice; (reprise) many’s the pink drink I’ve raised pissed iss all lies!
Muzzle me, mate; I’m the fat lady who sings.
You allowed my thoughts incline to pies, yield to any sign; the McDonalds’ even where I thrice once bought an apple pie.
Yeah, over the back fence where I lived in Melbourne, next to Balwyn’s library; (reprise) yeah, that opposite that 24-hour superette.
I pledge I’ll not dine again on Maccas as long as I exercise free will; (reprise) Old McDonald’d be spittin’ chips if he knew what they did to his song.
Strike me pink; that is a given; let them tick me off; o, so pouring oil on a lit wick.
All this I shall not refuse, yet donkeys bray despite their trials.
When the fast foods oleaginous are overthrown, all will hear my brayers and laugh along.
All will cook by the Pigs Arm’s cooks’ book; o, readers, send your recipes in.
As when a bull looks at a butcher, so their choice cuts will be strewn at the mouth of Sheol; (aside) o, typo in the name of Shoe, oops.
You need be on your best, matey, cobber; this pub is my local; please, please don’t eat the daisies; (reprise) please.
I’m not paranoid, but seriously I’m thinking Security.
Let each be hoist on their own petard, while I run all the way home whee whee whee.
*disclaimer: not piglet Dave a.k.a. Astyages, troubadour to the Pig’s Arms.
Window Dresser's Arms, Pig & Whistle 
I enjoyed your ‘psalm’ ‘Shoe… though I’m still not sure I understand it.
But it’s very musical, the rhythm and metre have Ciceronian echoes, methinks and I love the colloquial voices.
If I took a while to respond, it’s partly ’cause as you know, I like to read your pieces a few times and digest them properly before offering any comment, and partly because I wasn’t quite sure what to make of your ‘disclaimer’… I certainly couldn’t find ‘myself’ in any of the references, descriptions or actions you have written about in your psalm; nor would I have taken offense if I had; perhaps it was unnecessary, though I’m touched that you should consider my feelings…
🙂
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Hi asty
I thought the original psalm was awful. The rhythm of mine is intended to echo that original as closely as I could make it. I found it very difficult to match. The translation I used is at the weblink I provided.
Since I have found other translations and even bought a tiny King Kames (I think it is) version of the psalms in an op shop last week. 🙂
I was drawing a line in the sand that the original psalm is ‘A Psalm of David’, which is not the Pig’s Arms troubadour (yourself, Dave). I was providing you free publicity just because the opening was there.
Thank you for your feedback and for reading this pig psalm, asty,
Cheers.
Shoe.
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1000 guineas to any fair citizen that can translate Hudson’s recent post on Ellis’s blog.
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That sounds like just the challenge I need to finance my trip to WA, Vectis Lad! Now, which of Bob’s blogs was that exactly?
🙂
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I’ll make it easier. Translate any of his posts that contain three paragraphs…
Oh all right, two.
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You’re on! Gimme a day or two to do some research and I’ll get back to you!
😉
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Alas, my conscience will not allow me to take advantage, VL… since, yesterday, I found a post written by the famous HG with not two but FOUR paragraphs! Written, mind you, in PLAIN ENGLISH, with NO LONG SENTENCES, indeed the longest paragraph was only three lines… the shortest, one.
Honesty prevents me from ‘translating’ this post… and I’m kicking myself even as I type… (ouch!)
😉
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Astages, you’re not in the least bit fair and in fact are light on you can hardly be passed as eligible to apply for the prize money.
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Sandshoe, one of of grandsons had caught some tummy bug at the daycare centre. On their way to their holiday house on the South Coast, little accident happened and the three-year- old’s favourite Batman undies had to be left in Macca’s toilet.
Grandson refused to go to there to eat and told his reasons to everyone: ‘McDonald’s is greedy, they steal your best Batman undies.’
He still doesn’t like the place…
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I won’t ever wear my Batman undies to McDonalds. Another good reason to not go there. Thanks, Helvi. 😉
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Apologies to ‘shoe in advance.
Next time Hudson articulates what you really mean Hung, would you mind writing a little summary below so that I can tell what he’s talking about? You could be the best matched duo since the two Ronnies.
Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.
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By which I just mean that would would balance each other. 🙂
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lol 🙂
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Hudson might be in pain a lot of the time and pops out in his all weather op shop coat to try a free wireless connection propped against the lid of rubbish bin in a besser brick alcove outside the door of a public library, Julian…and its sometime winter a lot of his time and harder than he could have known.
Julian, perhaps Hudson so rarely converses with anybody he needs some practice.
Hudson perhaps wonders why is it every winter is harder than the last.
Julian, you have so frequently changed your identity I have had to spend fantastic amounts of time working out dialogue and its meaning, and persevered …otherwise its all gibberish to newcomers.
I reckon leave indirect references to the in-house chat of The Dot. What are you saying, Julian aka Vectis Lad among other identities? I’m up for it, I came out to read reviews and as well it’s starting to rain.
Shoe aka Christina Binning Wilson.
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I have never changed my identity…only my nickname 🙂
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See what I mean??
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“”Hudson might be in pain a lot of the time and pops out in his all weather op shop coat to try a free wireless connection propped against the lid of rubbish bin in a besser brick alcove outside the door of a public library, Julian…and its sometime winter a lot of his time and harder than he could have known.””
An interesting thought SS.
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Lovely work, ‘shoe.
Yeah, may the patrons not stray under the umbra of the Golden Arches.
Indeed there is peace and succor for all. Merv and Granny will not fail.
Wedges overcome our hunger, Best Bitter quenches our thirst.
Yes ‘shoe, the whole joint is Effin’ biblical, aint it?
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Yes agree
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So you are agreeable, Hung, with Big M’s state of genial mind towards my pig psalm, his drift and contemplation of the Pig’s Arms bent. Yo. 😉
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Yes. Us Sisters stick together 🙂
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Gossip was on all over town about what went on at the nurses’ quarters. 😉
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“Wedges overcome our hunger, Best Bitter quenches our thirst.”
Big M, that would look nice as an inscription in Gideon Bibles in motel rooms the countryside wide with a PA sticker. 🙂
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Nicely done like a dinner on the trans-continental between Genoa and Stockholm. The views constantly changing and yet remaining on course. A well cooked conundrum on omlsan. Thank you.
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What do you mean by ‘omlsan’, Gez?
It is kind of you to suggest this pig psalm is well cooked. You must have read the overdone original doozy. 🙂
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Good morning, piglets. And a special good morning, Boss because special thanks are due the illustrious addition to my work as I did not supply my own.
Hilarious. 🙂
Piglets, to understand the dilemma I acquired when I decided to strive to render this psalm couth, it will be worth the reader’s while to refer to the nauseating original. Need my head read. The psalms I have written before compared with the time it has taken to subdue this one were rattled off in a tinkle.
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Are you getting Hudson Godfrey, the indefatigable ‘every article’ blogger, to write some of your prose, SS?
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I’ll get onto my mate, Hud and have a word with him that his slip is showing.
Vectis. I don’t know of him, truly.
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Probably if one were to ponder the evidence presented on the aforementioned website by that illustrious writer it might be possible to form the opinion that the gentleman does not have a tendency to utilise a single word when he has the ability to convene 1000 smallest elements of a sentence to confect the same or a very similar meaning.
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A very nice way of saying very little, well done Voice 🙂
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Ponderous, is an apt word for his posts.
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Hung, you use very few words, Hudson uses many words; you both come across as authentic, I like that about people…
Hudson writes only under ‘Hudson’, and at least lately you are using only one pseudo ‘Hung One’, and I like that too, you know who you are ‘talking’ to.
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Thank you Helvi. Yes I only use Hung One On over at Unleashed. Not all of my posts get up and I will rarely go past a few sentences. I admire Hudson and your good self as you both often say what I would like to say but feel unable to articulate what I really mean.
It has been very interesting over time. I can see that you are are fair and authentic person yourself. I admire the way that you want our younger folk to challenge themselves and have a go without setting boundaries and of course within reason. In essence, this is Australia.
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HELVI.
Whatever pseudonym Hudson wrote under. it would be immediately detectable.
He knows that.
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Wheras I wouldn’t be (detectable).
Did you know that I was Antony Lowenstein & Bruce Haig?
No?
I thought not. Case proved..
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Sorry to be late on this one, busy, but I actually know Anthony Loewenstein and I’m pretty sure you ain’t him 🙂
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I thought you were Tracy Quan.
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Hung, I only partially agree with you. About hudson I mean; not Helvi.
Hudson must have a big crease in his trousers from fence sitting.
Sometimes he pontificates for 2oo words, only to say that, such & such may be so.
.
.
Or not.
.
.
As the case may be!.
.
Maybe!
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May he who has not sinned cast the first stone :;
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My post up above regards Hudson was intended to follow on this exchange.
I never enter into these exchanges about individual posters elsewhere and its ironic I have not ever encouraged its continuation, yet suddenly I am disappointed I invited my family and associates to drop into the Arms coincidental with this happening for the first time on a post of mine. This isn’t my game, piglets. If that hadn’t been evident by now. I don’t understand the gist neither the reasoning that it begins, Julian.
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And as one might of any reasonable companionship, Julian I am going to ask if you will consider posting yourself consistently by the one identity on the pages of my contributions.
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I am schizophrenic SS.
I am also gerard, Hung, Big M and Voice.
I’m the only one here…here…here.. echo..echo.
Oh apart from Warrigal. He is himself…sometimes.
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It’d be hard SS. I mean ..Cold Turkey? Is that what your asking for?
OK I’ll give it a go.
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You push me sorely with this hackneyed material you have written about ‘being schizophrenic’, Vectis. Why you would who knows.
If you do have schizophrenia, you would likely know better and if you don’t you demonstrate fearful bad form. I am very much disheartened.
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