Well, what can one say about Rouge and the boys.

Episode Number: 51 and a bit.

“Hey, for fuck sake” says Foodge in his usual nonchalant manner to the point where sleep seems to be the best option. “You know that dickhead Hung One On, well he predicted what that bloody Ethelbert IronInset[1] bloke and his theory of non-continuity said would happen, no flow, no logic and really no story line. You knowΒ  I think Hooster(common alias for Hung One On) is related to our lovable D.G. O’Hoo cause both are usually pissed on Trotter’s most of theΒ  time” he eloquently informs the patrons at the bar, just like an expert. Trouble for poor old Foodge is that an expert knows a whole lot about very little.

“Ya bloody joking” interjects O’Hoo “what’s this most of the time, I’d take umbrage at that if I knew what that meant”

“Look mate, this is reality here at the Pigs Arms and your response was written into the script so shut up an stop using up the word limit. You know that Rouge and Emmjay are bastards if the story goes to on two [sic] long as the customers will be drunk by the time this story finishes, comprehendre?” FFS[2] thinks Foodge

“Well where is dem[sicer] too[sicest] dingoes anyway?” thought bubbles O’Hoo.

“Hey Merv, O’Hoo needs a few more glass canoes” opines Foodge. “Never new[getting sicer] he could even think. They are on their way to Newcastle on the express train run by the gubbermint so they should get there in a couple of weeks or so. They wanna talk to Gib W”

“There on the steam express?” asks O’Hoo.

“Nah mate, drugs probably” laments Foodge as he secretly reminisces about his own dangerous past of drug abuse with paracetamol, thiamine and glucosamine, for what, a stuffed liver and trying to make a living hunting dangerous criminals like fine defaulters or four wheel drive owners, ah well, one can’t have everything in life. Definitely was never the booze, anyhoo read this and weep.





“So do you want to kill him?” asks O’Hoo as he fiddles with something in his pocket, a gun for sure right.

“Everything is on the table for discussion DG but please never actually ask for answer”

Authors Notes

[1] Hmm, was this quip too easy?

[2] Many thanks to the delightful Annabel Crabb for this one.

[3] I challenge anyone that has read the Foodge series to try and explain what it is really about. I haven’t got a clue.