Episode One Billion in Some Parts
Written by Shoe – Direction and Photography by Mark.
“Granny can’t be all that deaf,” Mark was remarking.
“I’m not going as Death,” Granny hollered. The cellar’s a long way. From is even longer by the time Granny climbs the stairs after a few quiet ones.
“Fancy dress,” Algy explained to Big M, “They’re holding an Allusion to celebrate we’re all in a better place.
“There’s a row of them in a big wooden box,” Foodge heard Granny screech as he walked in.
“I’m all done in, Uncle Merv.”
Merv set down a steaming cup of milo on the bar. Foodge expelled the breath of a man of all reason. Foodge was a season of reason. No-one dared ask. Foodge was likely to recount. He might recount his entire latest judgement. Foodge never came away from any trial without a good 40-minute obiter.
“Come to think of it,” Shoe said aloud. She thought she was only thinking it. “Foodge comes away from every trial like a man glued to postal mail.”
She wrote it down. Benj, new proprietor of the bookshop suggested, “Like a George the Fifth?”
So unnecessary. Overstatement of an adhesive. Strictly speaking, it had been used before.
“If we could make them a little less corny.”
Mark was remarking.
“Not again,” Yvonne groaned. Yvonne could barely breathe for fear if she stopped holding her breath in anticipation, Shoe would say nothing more, write nothing, least of all think.
“Breathe, Yvonne.”
Mark had it in hand. He placed the bar bill down on the, well, bar.
“I can’t read all these zeroes,” Shoe animated. “You can’t expect me to pay this as penalty. Three quadrillion billion five thousand and thirty two million…”
“That’s a heart starter,” sibilanted Big M. Big sibilanted in the face of all emergencies. He knew where to toss a vowel in for good effect when needed.
“Here’s a how-de-do,” Veronica Lake said. Ms Lake is new to that beer-soaked chook-squirt-stained establisment. Everyone remembers the Mexican chooks imported from, well, close to the truth.
“This is what comes of putting drinks on tick in an ever-expanding consciousness series sense,” Foodge interrupted, “I’ll take the case.”
PS
My deep thought for the day: I miss precedented times.
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i am charmed to be in the scene, but could someone please tell me what the eff is going on?!
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But does it require a mask shoe?
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Yes, as long as it’s a cheap, Chinese made, bacterial mask, or a home made cloth version. Oh, and the wearer has to fiddle with it constantly with their filthy fingers. That will do the job.
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Oh, give me strength, Sister M; that is a constant scene in our local food emporium. Argh,
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My mother’s doctor wants everyone to wear masks to protect us from Respiratory Syncytial Virus. I’ve only ever seen newborns sick with RSV, was my comment. No, he replied, adults get quite sick with it. Are they sick enough to be in hospital on CPAP or ventilation, no they’re not that sick!!!
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Maybe if the are immunocompromised??? But not the rest of us great unwashed adults.
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Yes, but they are the very folk who should be isolated. We manage to protect them from H1N1 (which is often just as lethal/contagious), etc, every year.
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Foodge channeling Trotsky now. I wonder how much that designer hair cut cost and where did he find someone who would have him in their salon..
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That’s why I always pay cash.
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