While some Pig’s Arms patrons are not big fans of cats, others are very fond of their feline companions but because of circumstances like unreasonable landlords or partners who eschew the job of emptying the litter box they are denied this simple pleasure.

After a long absence, our pub’s holding company Pig-Tel comes to the rescue !!!! with the release of our new range of eau-de-companion scents.

This festering season we bring you Chat Dion Odour. The essence of cat furniture polish. We’ll have your place returned to its gory days before Mrs Tasha went to that great pussy park in the sky.

For a more robust atmosphere you can go On Lion.

And as a bonus Pig-Tel will include Mrs Claws upholstery scratcher revitalising brush.

So all you former cat hoarders, call <the number for dial-a-prayer> and pony up just 3 payments of $39.99 plus postage and handling $114.26 and Pig-Tel will return your household to its former gory.

The first 10 mugs callers will receive at no extra charge our credit card fee waiver.

Act now !