Annual Recycle by Emmjay – first published in 2008 on the ABC Drum

Well, it’s September 1 and I for one am feeling the usual right to spring. Pedants, who insist that Spring starts on the equinox, somewhere around the 21st will have to forgive me.

It’s a fantastic day here in the Emerald City.

Wikipedia, in its unending generosity offers us two rites of Spring -the mid 80’s Washington punk band “Rites of Spring” and perhaps the more familiar – Igor Stravinsky’s Rite of Spring, or le Sacre du Printemps. The Russian escapes me, except that one is led to believe that notwithstanding the translation, the reference is more towards a pagan rite than a consecration.

It’s a pity that in our Australian cities, we so often make nothing special for the start of Spring. I think this is a great shame. It’s a missed opportunity to celebrate the possibility of renewal – perhaps if not always the actuality.

Other nations and cultures run riot in Spring. I have a Japanese friend who puts away all the winter accoutrements including visual art and even crockery and she changes a major part of her world with the change of season – bringing out the Spring linen and changing the menu, swapping many of the pictures on her walls. The new wardrobe. Life in the garden. Something more than a simple clean-up.

Stravinsky’s ballet score really gets into the swing of the new season with a dancing chorus of young girls – perhaps a little wasted on we of the Southern hemisphere since our Easter (Hester, oestrus, eggs, fertility, etc, etc, etc) falls in, well, fall. Moreover, with the possible exception of our pagan friends, references to ‘young girls’ these days are likely to provoke more anti-paedo outrage, than assist us to re-iterate a celebration of the earth.

And what of the Washington punk band ? Well, they recorded one eponymous LP on their own label, Discord Records. Need I say more?

Returning to the day, let’s hope this Spring brings with it sunshine as well as rain. Give a prayer for our farmers whose lives and livelihood are so challenged by the Australian climate. And look forward to the joys of Summer.

Or would that be… Don Henley and the “Boys of Summer”?

Praise also be to the inventors of anti-histamines 🙂

In late breaking news today, following the surprise defenestration of the entire South Moscow Genetics Laboratory from its own 9th storey window, DPravda reported today apparent errors in the DNA analysis of the bucket of survivor remnants form the infamous Wagnerev jet crash.

Former Lab chief, Joe Zefstalinski said that it was correct that the remains contained DNA from ten individuals and that these had been cross-matched with individuals NOT on the jet’s catering list.

Positive identification has been made and that the actual passengers included:

• N Kruschev
• Czarina K Romanoff
• Cosmonaut Leika
• The Sisters Karamazova
• An unnamed curtain raiser for the Bolshevik Ballet, and
• Elvis Presleyovski

I recently left the door of the courtyard open and something like this happened when Robert attempted to deal with dead bamboo leaves 🤪

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cv9BsOsMrFk/?igshid=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==

Story from Fantasy Land by our Cub Reporter Boo-boo Bear.

High school lovers, Chuck Windsor and Di sorry Cilla managed to land non-speaking walk-on parts in this year’s block busting Anglican drama “The King and I So Swear”

The couple played a pair of star crossed polo ponies whipped up in a sexually charged rite of spring

It has been said by some commentators that Chuck and his missus looked like they’d outrun their meds and that crowning it up with $Gazillions in pearls, diamonds (like ENORMOUS hunks of crystalline carbon, rubies, sapphires gold and more gold- sat uncomfortably with the peasants having to choose between heating or food, food or medicines, medicines or heating.

But hey, If you’ve ponied up for a $4 million coach and horses, you’d be a mug if you didn’t use this to get from A to A+ at least twice.

But for me, the most cheesy bit was Bill pledging allegiance to his Dad. Like he could hardly wait for the old badger to fall off the perch. And Chuck and Cilla looked like they’d be lucky to survive to make it to the after party.

The whole thing – or even just the bits I saw were just plain weird. Weird. As pointless as a hip pocket in a singlet. I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth.

And who was that woman with the sword who was wandering around looking like an armed Greek Airlines hostess ? Was it like she showed up at the wrong panto but nobody had the heart to drag her off stage ?

How cone the whole show was run by the Anglicans ? Was it because they owned the venue and it was a package deal ? Maybe this is one of the many mysteries – kind of like Lionel Ritchie and the screened off anointing with vegan olive oil – maybe that was the reason for the Greek Hostie.

All up – was it a success ? Hard to say- it was in brilliant colour unlike the last one, but there was no colour or passion on the faces of any of the headline actors. – Nobody was calling for an encore. – probably too much prostate pressure to permit hanging around.

Borrowed from the mighty Don Watson in “The Monthly”

https://www.themonthly.com.au/issue/2023/may/don-watson/bruce-petty-s-joke-machine