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~ The Home Pub of the Famous Pink Drinks and Trotter's Ale

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Category Archives: Astyages

Albatross

22 Wednesday Apr 2020

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Astyages

≈ 5 Comments

 

Video and Cover by Astyages

Not sure where exactly to post this as this pub seems to have far fewer rooms than it used to have… but I know it will at least be seen here, so here is where I’ll post it.

I’d have posted it much sooner, but I had a ‘medical emergency’ a week ago Friday and only got out of hospital on Wednesday. No, NOT COVID 19 (or so they tell me, anyway!) But it was a very nasty bout of pneumonia complicated by pulmonary embolisms. I’ll be on anti-coagulants for the next six months…

Anyway, here goes… Hope you all enjoy this video of me in my (motorized) kayak sailing past the wreck of the Santiago in the North Arm of the Port River, just behind Garden Island. The background music is me, playing Fleetwood Mac’s “Albatross” on my Epiphone ‘Dot’.

If you enjoy this, I have a few more videos (some with, and some without music) that I’d like to post, to share what I’ve been doing for the past few years with you all. If you watch it on a big screen it’s almost as good as being there!

 

Astyages Takes on the Boxer

18 Wednesday Mar 2020

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Astyages

≈ 4 Comments

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wItHG8B5yvU

We are Defs NOT Amused

12 Monday Sep 2016

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Neville Cole, Politics in the Pig's Arms, Virgil's Aeneid

≈ 12 Comments

Tags

Mad as Hell, Neville Cole, Trump

not-amused

The Pig’s Arms delights in the return of Neville Cole !

Queen Victoria once famously said “we are not amused” and for the first time in my life I can identify with that humorless old bitch. This past year has torn out my funny bone and stomped it to dust. I swear to god, Mad Max Fury Road is beginning to feel less and less apocalyptic and more and more like a best-case scenario for mankind.

A year ago, I’ll admit, there was still an aging anarchist inside me screaming: “Bring it on! How bad could Trump be? This shit is going to be hilarious!” But, like a lifelong atheist facing certain death, I’m starting to have second thoughts.

nev-1

I think my affliction began in earnest after I re-read Neil Postman’s Amusing Ourselves to Death. I’m here to say: that book is not fun. It’s just…not. In fact, it’s even more of punch to the kidneys today than it was 30 years ago when it was first published.

These days the things Postman says in Amusing Ourselves to Death don’t so much make you think as jump off the page, grab you by the throat, and beat you into submission.

Consider one of the book’s main themes…

Our politics, religion, news, athletics, education and commerce have been transformed into congenial adjuncts of show business, largely without protest or even much popular discourse.

If you have any doubt that this has happened. Well, let me introduce to you to a little thing we call “the internets.” Folks, we are living in the Golden Age of Show Business.

Some of Postman’s other concerns seem quaint in comparison to our brave new reality.

In AOTD for example, Postman reveals his horror that “the President of the United States is a former movie actor.” Damn! Who among us wouldn’t welcome Ol’ Ronnie back to the White House today with big old bag of jelly bellys* Honest Ronnie! We don’t care if you facilitate the sale of arms to the whole Middle East! Just come back and save us, please! We are begging you!

Hmm… Come to think of it. Seems like he had a point. Maybe we should have been more concerned back then.

After all, one of Postman’s big concerns was that Reagan was a celebrity. He felt that “the politician as celebrity has made political parties irrelevant.” Yeah, just ask the Republican Party about that one. Hey Fellas! You’re Fired!

By the way, does it not seem conceivable that elections could soon be broadcast reality show? Oh! I wonder who with get the Presidential Rose tonight! The way I see it, pretty soon ONLY celebrities will run for elected office. Who else is going to be able to compete?

I could go on and on about how much worse things have got since AOTD was published.

For example, at one point Postman notes bitterly that: public discourse has become dangerous nonsense.  Hoo boy! Do you think in his wildest dreams he ever imagined a Trump Policy Speech? Or the comments section of your local digital rag? Or Twitter, for christsakes!

But, you know, all this said, I can’t say I blame people for not being better informed. I’ve tried… and it’s damn, hard work.

Disinformation is the new norm and sorting truth from bullshit is damn near impossible; especially in a world where facts are irrelevant.

If you, like me, have tried to follow the press following Trump; it is obvious they have given up. There are so many distortions they start every report with a general disclaimer: Everything this guy says is a complete and utter lie. Then they try and pretend they are still reporting news. It is exhausting. For all of us. At a certain point you just have to get up and shut it off. And believe me, I’m not trying to pretend Hillary is all that different. It’s just that Trump has taken this whole dance into a different dimension. This is some historic crazy people.

97cbca5a8c7e66a4c2b6d95dd300ed11

And you know what? We are mad as hell and we’re not going to take it anymore! I see it everywhere. People are turning off and tuning out. They are no longer amused.

Jon Stewart famously left The Daily Show because of what he termed “bullshit mountain”. He explained that he just had to leave because “Watching these channels all day is incredibly depressing. I live in a constant state of depression,” he said. “I think of us as turd miners. I put on my helmet, I go and mine turds, hopefully I don’t get turd lung disease.”

You know, I think my whole point is… I know exactly how he feels and I am not amused. God help me, I am not amused.

*In case you weren’t aware, Jelly Bellys were Reagan’s all time favorite candy.

 

 

Bumper Christmas Edition 2013 – Life as a Dalek

26 Thursday Dec 2013

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Astyages

≈ 25 Comments

Tags

Cake, Dalek, Doctor Who, El Dorado, Perth, Tardis, United States

English: 2008 Shoprider Rainrider all-weather ...English: 2008 Shoprider Rainrider all-weather mobility scooter (Photo credit: Wikipedia)Story by Astyages

With the most immediately important repairs to the city of ‘El Dorado’ completed I began to resent my inability to do much in the house or garden and being thus obliged by circumstances to hire others to do what once I could have happily done myself. But worse still was the inability to get ‘out and about’ due to the limits of my ability to walk and stand, which has made doing my shopping my one major fortnightly outing and one which usually leaves me stiff as a board with backache as well as extra-sore feet.

Then I had a revelation, as I opened the gates to ‘El Dorado’ to get my car in (no remote-control on these ancient iron gates…) when a passing dalek stopped and, instead of uttering the expected ‘EXTERMINATE!’ laughed to see me limping around opening gates to get the car in and said, “Ya orta get wunna theez mate!”

He was right, too! So I did.

In exchanging emails with my old mate, Phil Rebe in Perth, I decided that such a mobility scooter was going to be needed if I were to be able to negotiate the airport and wander around Perth much. I found daleks (as I prefer to call ‘em instead of ‘gophers’… I mean, who wants to be a ‘gopher’? BTDT! But a dalek, now that could be fun…) can be taken on trains and even buses… though I haven’t been quite adventurous enough to try the buses… yet.

I can’t describe how much more freedom this little scooter has given me; I now go out for a ‘walk’ (well… perambulation, I suppose would be more accurate!) almost every day and can get to Elizabeth and/or Munno Para shopping centers easily; the large bag on a rack behind the seat carries quite a lot of groceries.

But to really show how much my mobility scooter spells ‘freedom’ to me, I can say it got me to Perth and back in good order and charge to spare! (Of course, the trains and planes helped a lot, too!)

An Imperial Dalek flies up a flight of stairs ...An Imperial Dalek flies up a flight of stairs (from Remembrance of the Daleks) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I call them ‘Daleks’ because I can just imagine how the notorious Daleks evolved from ‘wheelies’ like us (as the air stewardesses like to call us…) out of an extremely useful, but also extremely vulnerable, form of transport: First the armored exterior and bumper is added; then the weapon for self-defense (initially, at least) and the sucker is a good way to scab free rides from passing cars…

The stewardess who was pushing me through the airport enjoyed my theory, anyway. “You sound like you have it all figured out…” Charming girl… And I must say a huge THANK YOU to VIRGIN AIRLINES and their staff for all the help and care they took with me and my dalek… which are allowed to ride for no extra charge as ‘checked baggage‘.

I’ll write more about the actual trip and all the fun I had in Perth in a day or two; maybe even submit it to the Pigs’ Arms Bumper Xmas Edition, as editor Mike has requested a contribution from yours truly. I’ll see what I can do Mike! :)

Anyway, that’s all for now… Much more later!

Old Mississippi Blues

07 Tuesday May 2013

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Astyages

≈ 10 Comments

Tags

Guitar, Old Mississippi Blues

Music and Video by Astyages

Pig’s Arms Bumper Christmas Edition 2012 – Astyages Saves the World… AND Christmas!

25 Tuesday Dec 2012

Posted by astyages in Astyages

≈ 20 Comments

Tags

Les Paul, Santa stuck in chimney, UFOs

santa-stuck-in-chimney1

Story by Astyages

Gotta get this down while I can still remember it all… before THEY wipe my memory! But I don’t want to jump the gun! I must start at the very beginning…

So there I was, just a few days ago, sitting there at home minding my own business… Having fallen asleep watching old episodes of ‘Porridge’, I found myself rudely awakened by a sudden loud cursing in some strange, probably Scandinavian language, apparently coming from above and behind me. I turned my neck so quick I think I damn near dislocated it! But what I saw gave me such a shock I immediately forgot that pain… for there, dangling from the trapdoor which leads to the mysterious and hitherto unexplored regions of my loft, was the bottom half of a rather rotund gentleman clad in an ermine-lined, red velvet jacket and a pair of black moleskins over a pair of shiny leather boots, the tops of which were similarly fur-lined. At this stage his top half was invisible as the gent appeared to be stuck there… (and Gord alone knows how he got there, ’cause my roof hasn’t got a chimney!)

I instantly divined his problem: his jacket had got all rucked-up and was adding far more than was necessary to the stranger’s already impressive girth. I limped the few steps from my chair to the place underneath the trapdoor and, reaching up with the ‘reaching stick’ the insurance company had provided me with when I first had my accident, I started tugging at the jacket… As soon as I had pulled enough of it down to easy the jam the stranger fell down through the hole, skittling me in the process. The weighty gent picked himself up with remarkable agility and then bent down to offer me a hand. I took it and allowed myself to be pulled to my feet by a figure I never in my wildest dreams ever imagined I would ever meet, for standing there, right in front of my was a red-capped, bespectacled, white-bearded, red-cheeked fellow who could be none other than Santa Claus…

“Crikey!” I exclaimed aloud, “Those bloody painkillers must be stronger’n I thought… I’m hallucinating!”

“Ho-ho-ho!” The figure in red said, adjusting his jacket underneath his belt, “You not hallucinating minheer! You seein’ da real Santa Claus! Who yust picked you up from da floor? When you ever actually feel a hallucination? A hallucination strong enough to lift you up, ja?”

He had a point there… but I was cagey: “How do I know you’re the real Santa Claus and not just an imposter? I mean, there’s lot of ’em about at this time of year!”

“No problem!” he said… “Who else would bring you chrissie prezzie…?” I was astounded; I’d lived alone for so long I’d virtually forgotten about prezzies. Curious, I couldn’t resist asking, “Ah… What prezzie?” It was only then I noticed the large sack which had come through the trapdoor with him, as he put his hand inside it and pulled out a Les Paul guitar! Now, I’m a pretty cynical dude and not easily convinced when it comes to believing in fairytales, but Les Pauls don’t lie… this dude had to be Santa!

“Wow!” I said… and then, as I reached forward to take the guitar from him, I intoned, “I do believe in fairies! I do believe in fairies…!” just in case it should turn out to be a dream. But the ‘dream’ didn’t fade as I took the guitar in hand and plugged it into my amplifier; and the first few notes, amplified by those superb double-coiled, humbucking pickups, left me in no doubt; the guitar was real! So Santa must be real too!

“But hang on a sec, Santa! How come I get a prezzie this year? And why such an expensive prezzie too? I mean, all my life all I’ve had are socks’n’jox and maybe an occasional fishing rod, but I’ve never ever had such an expensive prezzie; and it’s just EXACTLY what I wanted… There’s something suspicious going on here…”

“Aha, mein freund!” the fat man said, “You are so sharp! You never miss a trick! Zat’s why you were chosen… And I have to admit zat ze reason you haven’t had so many prezzies in ze past is ‘coz you bin a naughty fella for so long… But ziss year is different; ziss year we need your help… ze guitar is a teensy-weensy bribe…”

But before he could explain further, there was a lot of scuffling noises from the ceiling above us and then several, dwarf-like creatures with grey-green skin, huge bulbous heads and large black, almond-shaped eyes, descended from the trapdoor. Each of them held something in their right hands; and as Santa suddenly fell silent and raised his hands. Santa’s reaction could only mean one thing: ‘they can only be ray-guns!’ I thought…

I also thought it wise to immediately put down the Les Paul and follow suit…

After exchanging several series of what can only be described as clicking noises with his two assistants the tallest of the dwarf-like creatures, who was evidently their boss, said, “I’m taking you both to our leader!”

“Shouldn’t that be the other way round?” I said, without thinking.

“Ah, but you, my dear Astyages, recognize no leaders; in your former incarnation you were a king of kinds; in this one you are an individual who, though poor, recognizes no master; it is for these reasons that you have been chosen… And as for Santa… The Master has his own reasons for wanting to see him!”

I hated the thought of being ‘chosen’ for anything… it smacked of responsibility and worse, seemed to imply the probability of work!

“Then you’ll just have to choose someone else, won’t you?” The grey dwarf, who I now realized was an actual, bona fide alien, just silently raised his ray-gun level with my forehead and allowed the corners of his slit-like mouth to raise into something which was not quite a smile. “Oh, alright then… If I must, I suppose I must…”

I could spend whole chapters describing the journey we next underwent; how we traveled in a flying saucer to the South Pole, fighting off American fighter planes from the US fleet all the way across the Southern Ocean, ’til we finally flew down into an immense cavern which took us deep into a world which I now realized was REALLY hollow!

In a fantastic underground city we were taken to a building which would have dwarfed the twin towers and given the Empire State Building a good run for its money, where we ascended to the penthouse suite which the Master was currently using as a pied-a-terre. As we ascended in the lift, I wondered why I’d been chosen and for what… I’d attempted to get further information from the greys during the flight but they remained silent and refused to make any comment.

Finally the greys escorted us through a luxurious apartment and out onto a rooftop garden which would have put the Hanging Gardens of Babylon to shame, and there, sitting on a chaise-longue drinking gin and tonic, was the Master, who I couldn’t help but think looked a lot like Jimi Hendrix…

Using telekinesis, the greys forced Santa and I to our knees, with our foreheads to the floor, as if salaaming… “Let them up you idiots!” the Master said, “I need their willing cooperation!”

The Master didn’t realise it, but he had just made his first mistake; whatever it was he needed my cooperation for, I most certainly was NOT going to oblige him!

“Forgive those stupid Greys,” the Master said, “they are one of the most uncivilized species in this galaxy! No manners at all!”

“What do you want with us?” Santa demanded. “Why have you brought us here?”

“I’ve brought you here because you two are the last ‘hold-outs’… the last two people on the whole of planet earth who have not somehow been subverted, brainwashed, bought or otherwise incorporated within structures which are ultimately owned by the Illuminati. Surely you’ve suspected…?” We both nodded silently, “I’ve known for some time…” Santa said, then, turning to me he added “I was trying to warn you when we were so rudely interrupted… and brought here…”

“You will be used as ‘Judas goats’; we will first brainwash you then program you to be the most zealous advocates of our cause; from the human perspective you will be leading the exodus from the doomed planet earth to travel to another earth-like planet in the constellation of Arcturus… You’ll act as travel-agents as well as poster-boys for our human migration plan to our home-world…”

The Master must feel confident of himself, I thought, if he could afford to give away such staggering details, even in such a tiny slip… but the words ‘human’, and ‘homeworld’ in the same sentence told me I was dealing with aliens here… Space aliens, or inter-dimensional ones? I wondered, but had little chance to find out, as the Master explained that the purpose of migrating the whole human population to Arcturus was so they can be farmed as fodder and used as slave labour… but we two would live like kings… with every one of our senses most abundantly gratified in all kinds of imaginative ways…

I’d heard enough; the time had come to act! If I waited any longer they’d isolate me and then start to work on me psychologically; if I acted now at least I might have some element of surprise as they wouldn’t be expecting either of us to resist the three armed guards who had escorted us and who were still aiming their weapons at us… Moving suddenly, and hoping Santa would realize what I was doing and at least just move himself out of the line of fire, I put myself at the center of a cross with three Greys to my left, right and in front of me, desperately hoping my sudden movement would trigger the precise reaction it did: the Greys all instantly pointed their weapons at me, but just as they fired, I dived into a combat roll aimed at the feet of the one in front of me…

The Greys to the right and left of me were instantly vaporized by their own ray-guns, while the third Grey hit the Master with a glancing shot that left him seriously concussed and winded, as I came out of my combat roll onto to my knee, finishing the roll with a punch to the groin which thankfully turned out to be as painful for the Grey as it is for humans. He dropped his weapon as he doubled up, whimpering in a foetus-position on the floor as I carefully took aim and vaporized him.

I went across to the Master and saw he was wearing some kind of mask which had been damaged to reveal reptilian scales underneath the human-like face… I knew it could never have been Jimi! There was not even a single guitar in sight! This was just another psychological ploy to gain my sympathy and trust… Mercilessly, I zapped the Lizard-man into oblivion.

Finally turning my attention to Santa, I realized he was not entirely surprised by my actions… I gave him a quizzical look, with my head tilted to one side… “You were expecting this, weren’t you?”

“Errr… Ummm… ahhh… let’s just say, ‘hoping’ shall we? But yes, I was rather relying on your skills as a martial artist… Now, quickly, we must get out of here before any more of them come! We can hijack a saucer; I was watching how they operated them on the way here…”

“Yeah, me too!” I said… “Now let’s go!”

The ray-guns made it easy for us to get out of the building and into the private car-park where our guard had previously parked their flying saucer (I must use this term now, as they are not ‘UFO’s any more!)

Speed, surprise and a couple of zaps from the ray-guns took care of the guards; and, if we’d both been watching them to learn how to fly the saucer, I’d also been keenly observing how they operated their weapons systems… As we flew out over the underground city I saw my target and yelled at Santa to head towards it as we fought off a small fleet of half-a-dozen more flying discs… After finally shooting down the last of these I had just enough time to aim and hit the ‘fire’ button to loose a photon torpedo at what had looked to me very much like the city’s nuclear power-station. We saw the explosion and the beginnings of an unmistakeable ‘mushroom’ cloud behind us as the shock-wave finally hit us… Tilting the saucer at an angle, I found I could ‘surf’ the shock-wave ’til we finally shot out of the cavern’s opening like a bullet from a gun… In the rear-view screens we could clearly see that our explosion had started a chain-reaction as the major buildings of the whole city were blasted into their component atoms.

Of course, we took the long way ’round on the way home, to avoid having to fight the US fleet in the Southern Ocean, ’cause those guys shoot first and ask questions later! But as soon as we got home I’ve prepared this report for YouTube; the world MUST be warned; though I shall post it under a pseudonym. The Lizardmen’s dastardly plan, which had been scheduled to start on 21/12/12 has, I think, suffered a serious setback, but sooner or later, they will be back from Planet X with another attempt to turn us all into lizard-fodder! In the meantime, NOW is the time to turn against your Illuminati masters, who will be weakened at least temporarily by the absence of the Master…

Anyway, now you all know why the world didn’t actually end on 21/12/12 as it was supposed to; Santa and I have managed to buy it a temporary reprieve, but how long that will last is unknown; in the meantime, Santa assures me that he will not let this little escapade interfere with his usual Christmas duties and I’ve let him keep the flying saucer to help him with this… so, without undue modesty, I can truthfully say that I have not only saved the world, but Christmas too! With Santa’s help, of course!

Happy Christmas piglets!

Asytages

Conspiracy Theories

07 Wednesday Nov 2012

Posted by astyages in Astyages

≈ 55 Comments

Tags

aliens, conspiracy theories, UFOs

A Grassy Knoll in Dallas

Story by Astyages

Okay fellow piglets, here is the article I’ve been tantalizing you with and for which you have all waited so long! But you’d better fasten your seat-belts and hang on to your tidfer’s ladies and gents, ’cause we’re in for a bumpy ride!

The first problem in any survey of conspiracy theories is their overwhelming overabundance; where does one start… We could start with what happened to all the German scientists after the end of WWII, or we could begin by looking at a more modern phenomenon: UFOs.

Now as a sci-fi fan since childhood, I’ve always kinda wanted to believe in UFOs, but, at least, prior to this survey, the rationalist in me would have put its probability somewhere between virtually absolutely nil and absolutely nil… And yet…

Once we were told there were no such thing as UFOs which led some to speculate that perhaps the whole UFO phenomenon wasn’t perhaps a smokescreen for the USAAF’s own experimental aircraft. ‘Cover-up!’ was the catch-cry when rumors of Roswell reverberated around to globe to the accompaniment of some somewhat less than convincing alien interviews and autopsies.

On the other hand, in the USA, there is currently an ongoing UNCOVER-UP operation surrounding UFO’S, aliens of all the interplanetary and/or interdimensional kinds and all kinds of apparently well-qualified, sensible and serious people, people who have themselves actually worked at area 51, have come forward and admitted to having reverse-engineered alien spacecraft; we are informed by such sources that 95% of UFO phenomena are ‘our own birds’… the other 5%, we are informed, belong to ‘aliens’. Now, to the objection that interplanetary space-travel is, at least to the best of our knowledge, impossible because of the immense time/spaces involved, the ufologists have come up with the notion that ‘aliens’ are indeed, not interplanetary, but interdimensional, beings, who, as any sci-fi fan from the fifties can readily tell you, come back to save their future world from some kind of evolutionary dead-end… Now THIS is where Planet X and the lizardmen come in… Those I refer to as ‘Lizardmen from the Planet X’ (What a title for a sci-fi movie! I’m sure I’ve seen something somewhat similar at some stage in my sci-fi subscribing career…) are called by others ‘Annunaki’; and there is another race known as ‘Nephilim’… both of which – surprise, surprise! – have been prophesied in the bible… (where else?)

Now, there’s a war in ‘heaven’ (ie. Space) between these two that has been going on for at least 2,000 years… Oh, and it was are alien ‘gods’, the Annunaki and Nephilim, who built all the pyramids, don’tcha know… and taught our bronze-age ancestors all about ancient technology… (’cause they were too stupid to think of anything like experimenting or observation, or any of that scientific stuff all on their lonesome, eh?)

Anyway; the upshot of it is that it’s all coming to a head and we’re to meet our new alien overlords on 21st December 2012… which is nice, isn’t it? They’ll arrive just in time for Christmas! To save us all from a life of meaningless overindulgence… S’pose they’ll probably begin by banning it! I, for one, won’t miss it in the slightest!

Ah! But then there’s the OTHER alien prophecy; the one that says the Annunaki are only pretending to be our mates and they’re really out to ‘harvest’ us to take all back to their planet to farm us for lizard-feed; though it’s anyone’s guess as to why they’ve waited 2,000 years or more. And of course, if the Annunaki were the satanic, snakelike aliens – the ‘fallen ones’ in the bible’ – the Nephilim are the ‘good guys’; god’s angels (who came to earth but weren’t ‘fallen’), who’re supposedly gonna bring back Jesus to save us all from the Annunaki and… well… who-knows what really? Becoming lizard-feed, I suppose…

Once upon a time the FAA told the American public it was not interested in hearing any more UFO reports; the government was very much in denial about the fact that there was a genuine phenomenon to be investigated. It ostracized and lampooned anyone who attempted to report UFOs until people were generally put off reporting them for the sake of their reputations as sane people… Now there are sane and authoritative people from the army, air-force and even the police force, admitting to having seen and, in some cases, actually worked with real aliens…

It’s intriguing to note that there is also another conspiracy theory out there that says the UFO phenomenon is not a real phenomenon at all, but that, in fact, UFOs are holographic projections from all that ‘Star Wars’ hardware the space-shuttle program put into space between the ’70s and the ’90s… the aim of all these holographic lazer-shows being, of course, social control through the only means the American government, apparently, knows: fear… in this instance fear of alien overlords coming to eat us on the one hand, or fear of the angels who may decide NOT to rapture humans out of the ‘tribulations’ after all! Or, perhaps they are here to judge who goes to live with them on their Nephilim homeworld (if, that is, this isn’t just a cover-story and the Nephilim are the real bad guys, ’cause after all, the Annunaki taught us technology etc…) in ‘heaven’; and who stays here to fry in what looks like it’s shaping up to be the hell of an inevitable nuclear conflagration (at least, according to this rather nihilistic prophecy).

Only ONE thing is certain about this: the US Government NOW apparently WANT us to believe in UFOs… Why? Is it at all possible they could be real? I’d love to know what you guys think…

Hang on, I hear you ask me, what has that to do with Nazi scientists after the end of WWII? Good question, and I’m glad you asked… You do realize, of course, that humanity was robbed of the possibility of universal, free, and safe electrical power by Thomas Edison, who, if history is read cynically, may possibly be implicated in the suspicious death of Nikola Tesla, who had plans to give the world unlimited, free energy? Oh? Well… you do now, anyway… Well… Tesla had plans for a whole lot of stuff, including anti-gravity machines which Hitler had built into the world’s first undisputedly real flying saucers…

My own theory is the Annunaki and Nephilim stories come from the neo-Cons and, as I’ve already said, aims at establishing social control through fear; using the gullibility – not to mention, ‘bullyability’ of the American bible-belt… But social control for what? First let’s be clear that it is GLOBAL social control we’re talking about here; and as for what… the bulk of the world’s population is to be kept in controlled ignorance while the neo-Cons destroy the world’s economy as a prelude to denuding the earth of at least 80% of its population… the result of doing the maths on the suggestion by the Georgia Guidestones, that the world’s population be kept under half a billion…

And how is this ‘desirable’ population-level to be achieved? Oh, through wars where there’s another interest to make going to war ‘on the ground’ necessary; otherwise, primarily through manipulated and engineered natural disasters as a result of using HAARP as a weapon; there are those who already believe the Fukushima tsunami was the result of a HAARP attack. The USA also has a whole range of other, formidable, sonic weapons, some designed specifically for crowd control… Oh, and the other major methodology of depopulation is to be starvation, even in the midst of plenty! Two words you should all investigate are these: ‘Codex Alimentarius’… in this heinous document, about nine or ten of the world’s absolute WORST food pollutants, which were regulated against because they were so heinous, are now to be allowed back into our diet… (You already know that thalidomide is back on the market again, don’t you?) And the world’s food is to be genetically engineered so that it will contain no nutritional content whatsoever…

Now, as a disbeliever, I might derive some relief from my straining incredulity when I discovered how many of these conspiracy theories actually come from some pretty fundamentalist christian sources; but that doesn’t mean there’s nothing to worry about… Alex Jones, for instance does an excellent job of scaring the shit out of people (me included!) by secretly filming inside the Bohemian Grove on the night of the Skull’n’Bones Club’s annual ‘Burning of Care’ ritual, which amounts to the sacrifice, in human effigy, of ‘Care’… or, in other words, their consciences!

Check it out for yourselves: http://youtu.be/FpKdSvwYsrE

Regardless of Alex Jones’ own personal belief’s and motivations, (and I DO think he’s doing his thing for the benefit of his country…) this is a serious worry… Supposedly 46 presidents of the USA have belonged to this club… which is a front, of course, for the illuminati, who are all (neo-Cons, I’m sure!) getting themselves as rich as Croesus while their own country’s and the world’s economies crash around their ears. In certain circles, Obama has been likened to Nero!

When most of the ‘rulers of the free world’ are all members of the same secret society(s), I’d say there’s something SERIOUS to worry about… One can no longer even think of the USA and ‘Democracy’ as having anything to do with each other, except insofar as the word is used, together with some remarkably impressive pieces of street-theatre (called ‘elections’) to lead the sheeple by the nose while they are first fleeced and then sent to the slaughter…

Whew! Well… that’s not all there is to it, of course… but I hope it’s enough to start a discussion! If discussion seems brisk and interesting enough perhaps I’ll write a sequel… In the meantime, here’s something for you all to think about:

http://youtu.be/hTvik184IMs

And in case you think, ‘Oh, that’s just those stupid yanks!’, check this out:

http://youtu.be/UwDxdIRUvNs

(Disclaimer: I have the excuse of being paranoid; however, I cannot be held responsible if any of this information should happen to upset your reality. Asty)

BILITIS: Elegies at Mytilene, part 2 (Finale)

08 Saturday Sep 2012

Posted by astyages in Astyages

≈ 13 Comments

Tags

Bilitis, Elegies at Mytilene, elegies at mytilene part 2, Lamprias, Lydia, Mydzouris, Partwnis, sapphic poetry, sapphic verse, Satyra

My dear fellow piglets, this final episode of ‘Bilitis’ details the final decline and demise of the now-aging courtesan… It is also my ‘farewell’ to you all, as I intend to take a long break from the pub. I have a strange intuition that somehow or other I am responsible for the recent sudden mass exodus of piglets which seems to have left the front bar so bereft of clientele. If this is indeed the case, then I can only assume that I must have said or done something pretty bad to offend someone or other, and for this offense, whatever it is, I do most sincerely apologize. I only hope that my prolonged absence may eventually prompt their return…

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this final piece, as I quote the words of Scott of the Antarctic, “I’m going outside now… I might be gone for some time…” (Asty)

BILITIS: Elegies at Mytilene, (part 2)

131 – THE JUGGLER

When the first dawn mingled with the

weakening glimmer of the torches, I introduced to

the orgy a flute player, defective and nimble [?vicieuse et agile? contradictory!]

who trembled a bit, being cold.

Hire the little girl with the blue eyelids,

with short hair, with pointy breasts, clothed

only in a girdle, from which hung some

yellow ribbons and some stalks of black irises.

Hire her! Because she was clever and did some

difficult turns. She juggled with some

hoops, without breaking anything in the room, and

slid across it like a grasshopper.

Occasionally she performed cartwheels [‘… faisait la roué sur les mains et sur les pieds’] Or with two arms in

the air and her knees apart she bent herself

backwards and touched the earth, laughing.

132 — THE FLOWER DANCE

Anthis, the dancer from Lydia, has seven veils

around her. She unrolls the yellow veil,

her black hair spills out. The pink veil

slides from her mouth. The white veil falls

letting us see her naked arms.

She releases her small breasts from the red veil

which she unravels. She drops the green veil from

her hips to her feet. She pulls the

blue veil from her shoulders, but she presses

on her modesty the last, transparent veil.

The young people beg her: she shakes her

head back. To the sound of flutes alone,

she tears it away just a little, then entirely, and,

with the gestures of the dance, she plucks

flowers from her body,

Singing, “Where are my roses, where are my

perfumed violets? Where are my sprigs of

parsley? – There are my roses, I give them to you.

There are my violets, do you want them? There is

my beautiful curly parsley.”

133 – SATYRA’S DANCE (not translated)

134 – MYDZOURIS CROWNED (not translated)

135 — VIOLENCE

No, you will not take me by force, it doesn’t

count, Lamprias. If you had heard said

that someone had violated Parthenis, you know

what that puts in her breast, because no-one enjoys us

without being invited.

Oh! Away from your betters, make some effort, it’s

missing. Meanwhile I protect myself from pain.

I shall not call for help. And I

shall not even struggle; but I move. Poor friend,

missed again!

Continue. This little game amuses me. In the same proportion

that I am sure to vanquish you. One more unhappy

attempt, and perhaps you will be less

disposed to prove to me your extinct desires.

Tyrant, what are you doing! Dog! You’re breaking

my wrists! And this knee is disembowelling me!

Ah! Go, now, it is a beautiful victory,

to ravish a tearful young girl on the ground.

136 – SONG

The first gave me a necklace, a necklace of

pearls which was worth [?’…qui vaut…’] a town, with the palace and

the temples, and the treasures and the slaves.

The second made me some verses. He said

that my hair was black as the

night on the sea and my eyes were blue like

the morning.

The third was so beautiful that his mother

could not kiss him without blushing. He put his

hand on my knees, and his lips on my

naked feet.

You, you have said nothing to me. You have given

me nothing, because you are poor. And you are not

beautiful, but it is you that I love.

137 – ADVICE TO A LOVER

If you wish to be loved by a woman, oh young

friend, such as she, don’t tell her that

you want her, but make her see you every

day, then disappear, so you can return.

If she addresses her words to you, be amorous

without being too earnest. She will come to you

by herself. Know then, to take her by force, the

day she intends to give herself to you.

When you receive her into your bed, forget

about your own pleasure. The hands of a woman

in love are trembling and without caresses.

Dispense with them to be zealous.

But you, take no rest. Prolong

your embraces until you lose your breath. Do not let

her sleep, even if she begs you. Always

kiss the part of her body towards which

she turns her eyes.

138 – FRIENDS AT DINNER

Myromeris and Maskhale, my friends, come with

me, because I have no lover this evening, and,

lying on beds of [?’byssos’], we

will chat over dinner.

A night of rest will do you good: you

will sleep in my bed, even without make-up and

un-coiffed. Put on a simple tunic of wool

and leave your jewels in their chest.

No-one will make you dance to admire your

legs and the heavy movements of your loins.

no-one will ask you for sacred symbols,

to judge if you are lovers.

And I have not commanded, for us, two

flute-players with beautiful mouths, but

two cooking-pots of peas, rissoles, some

honey-cakes, some fried croquettes and my last

wine-skin from Khios.

139 – TOMB OF A YOUNG COURTESAN

Here is housed the delicate body of Lydia, little

dove, the most joyous of all the

courtesans, who more than any other loved

orgies, her floating hair, the soft

dances and tunics of hyacinth.

More than any other she loved savoury [?’glottismes?]

kisses on the cheek, the games

which the lamp alone saw and love which broke

her limbs to pieces. And now, she is a

little shade.

But before she was put in her tomb, she was

marvellously coiffed and laid

among roses; even the stone which covers her

is all impregnated with essences and perfumes.

Sacred earth, nurturer of all, welcome

gently the poor dead, let her sleep in

your arms oh Mother! And let grow all around

the stele, not nettles and brambles, but

delicate white violets.

140 – THE LITTLE ROSE-SELLER

“Yesterday,” Nais told me, “I was in the square,

when a little girl in red rags

passed, carrying roses, in front of a group of

young people. And here is what I heard:

“Buy something from me.” – “Explain yourself,

little one, because we don’t know what your are selling:

You? Your roses? Or both at once?” — “If

you buy all my flowers, you may have

the seller for nothing.”

“And how much do you want for your roses?” — “I must have

six obols for my mother or else I shall be beaten

like a dog.” – “Follow us. You shall have one

drachma.” – “Then shall I go and look for my little sister?”

“This child was not a courtesan, Bilitis,

nobody knew her. Truly is it not a

scandal… and shall we tolerate these girls

coming to dirty during the day the beds which

we rely upon during the evening?”

141 – THE DISPUTE

Ah! By Aphrodite, there you are! Bloodsucker!

Putrefaction! Stinker! Barren! Riff-raff [?‘carcan’?]!

Left-hander! Good-for-nothing! Sow!

Don’t try to run away from me, but come here…

And again closer still…

See me, this sailors’ woman, who

doesn’t even know how to pleat her robe over

her shoulder and who puts on such bad make-up that

the black from her eyelashes runs down her cheek

in rivers of ink.

You are Phoenician: sleep with those of

your own race. For me, my father was Greek:

I have a right over all those who wear the [?’petase’?].

and even over the others, If I so choose.

Don’t stop any more in my street, or I’ll send you

to Hades to make love with Charon, and I

shall say very justly, “May the earth rest

lightly upon you…”

So the dogs can dig you up!

142 – MELANCHOLY

I shiver; the night is cool, and the

forest all moist. Why have you brought me

here? Isn’t my big bed

sweeter than this moss strewn with stones?

My flowery dress will be stained with greenery

my hair will be tangled with twigs;

my neck, look at my neck,

how soiled it is already by the humid earth.

Of old however, I’d have followed into these

woods here… Ah! Leave me alone for little while.

I am sad, this evening. Leave me, without speaking,

hands over my eyes.

In truth, can you not wait! Are

we brute beasts to take each other

thus! Leave me alone. You shall not open my

knees nor my lips. My eyes even, from

fear of crying, are closed.

143 – LITTLE PHANION

Stranger, stop, look who has beckoned

you: it’s little Phanion from Kos, she

deserves that you choose her.

See, her hair is frizzy as parsley,

her skin is sweet as a bird’s down.

She is small and brown. She speaks well.

If you wish to follow her, she will not ask

for all the money from your voyage; no, but

one drachma or a pair of shoes.

You will find at her house a good bed, some fresh

figs, some milk, some wine, and, if it is

cold, there will be a fire.

144 – SIGNS

If you must have, passer-by who stops, slender

thighs and nervous loins, a hard

throat, knees which grip, go to the house of

Plango, she’s my friend.

If you’re looking for a laughing girl, with

exuberant breasts, of a delicate height, her crutch

fleshy and moist [‘grasse’], go to the corner

of this street, where lives Spidorrhodellis.

But if long tranquil hours in the

arms of a courtesan with sweet skin,

a warm belly and pleasantly scented hair

look for Milto, and you will be content.

Do not hope for much from love; but

profit from her experience. One can ask

all from a woman, when she is naked,

when it is night, and when the hundred drachmas

are on the mantel.

145 – THE SELLER OF WOMEN

“Who is there?” — “I am the seller of

women. Open the door, Sostrata, I have

presented to you on two occasions before this one.

Approach, Anasyrtolis, and undo your robe.” –“She

is a bit fat.”

“She is a beauty. What’s more, she dances

the Kordax and she knows eighty

songs.” – “Turn around. Lift your arms.

Show your hair. Give me your foot. Smile. That’s good.

This one, now.” – “She is too

young!” — “No she’s not, she was twelve years old

the day before yesterday, and you would not have to teach

her anything.” – “Remove your tunic. Let’s see? No, she

is too thin.”

“I’m only asking one mina.” – “And the

first?” – “Two minas thirty.” – “Three minas

for both of them?” – “Done!”. “Go in there

and wash yourselves. You, farewell.”

146 – THE STRANGER

Stranger, go no further into the town.

You will not find elsewhere but in my house

girls younger or more expert. I am

Sostrata, famous across the sea.

See this one whose eyes are green

as water in the grass. You don’t want her?

Here are some other eyes which are black as

violets, and hair three cubits long.

I have still better. Xantho, open your [?cyclas?].

Stranger, her breasts are hard as quinces,

Touch them. And her beautiful belly, as you see,

wears the three folds of Kypris.

I bought her with her sister, who is not yet

of an age to love, but who seconds her

usefully. By the two goddesses! You are of a

noble race. Phyllis and Xantho, follow the

cavalryman!

147 – PHYLLIS (not translated)

148 — THE MEMORY OF MNASIDIKA

They danced one in front of the other, with

rapid, flying movements; seeming

always to want to be entwined, and yet they

never touched at all, except at the tips of their lips.

When they turned their back in dancing,

they looked at each other over their shoulders,

and the sweat shone on their raised arms,

and their fine hair brushed across their breasts.

The languor of their eyes, the fire of their

cheeks, the gravity of their faces, were

three earnest songs. They brushed against each other

furtively, bowing their bodies at the hips.

and suddenly, they fell, to

perform on the ground a softer dance [la danse molle]… Memory

of Mnasidika, it was then that you appeared to me,

and everything, outside your dear image, was tiresome.

149 – THE YOUNG MOTHER

Do not believe, Myromeris, that, having become a

mother, that you will be diminished in beauty. See here, how

your body under your dress has drowned its thin

form within a voluptuous softness.

Your breasts are two vast flowers inverted

on your chest, whose cut stems

nurture a milky sap. Your belly,

sweeter still, swoons under the hand.

And now consider the tiny little child

which is born from the thrills that you had one

evening in the arms of a passer-by whose name you

no longer know. Dream of her remote destiny.

Her eyes which opened to pain will be elongated

one day with a line of black paint, and they

will sprinkle over men sadness or joy,

with a movement of their lashes.

150 — THE UNKNOWN

He’s sleeping. I don’t know him. He

horrifies me. However, his purse is full of gold

and he gave a slave four drachmas when he

came in. I hope for a mina for myself.

But I have said to the Phrygian to get into the bed

in my place. He was drunk and mistook her for

me. I would sooner die on the

rack than to stretch out next to this man.

Alas! I dream of the prairies of the Taurus…

I had been a little virgin… Then, I had a

light chest, and I was so foolish with a

lover’s envy that I hated my married sisters.

What would I not have done to obtain that which

I refuse tonight! Today, my

breasts are shapeless [‘se plient’], and in my worn-out

heart too, Eros sleeps from weariness.

151 – TRICKERY

I wake up… Is he gone then? Did he

leave anything? No: two empty

amphorae and some soiled flowers. The whole carpet

is red with wine.

I slept, but I am still drunk… With

whom then, did I come home?… Nevertheless we

slept together. The bed is even soaked

with sweat.

Perhaps there were several; the bed is

such a mess [si bouleverse] I don’t know any more… But I

saw them! There’s my Phrygian! Still

sleeping across the door.

I kicked her in the chest

and I shouted, “Bitch, you couldn’t…”

I was so hoarse I couldn’t speak.

152 – THE LAST LOVER

Child, do not pass by without having loved me.

I am still beautiful, in the night; you will see

how much my warmer is my autumn than the

springtime of another.

Do not look for love from virgins. Love

is a difficult art in which young girls are

little versed. I have taught them all my

life to give to my last lover.

My last lover, it will be you, I know.

Here is my mouth, for which a whole people [pour laquelle un peuple a…]

have paled with desire. Here is my hair, the same

hair that Psappho the Great sang about.

I shall receive in your favour all that

is left to me of my lost youth. I shall burn

the memories themselves. I shall give you

the flute of Lykas, the girdle of Mnasidika.

153 – THE DOVE

I have already been beautiful for a long time; the day

is coming when I will no longer be a woman. And then I

shall know torn memories, the

solitary burning envies and the tears

in my hands.

If life is a long dream, what good is it

to resist it? Now, four and five times a

night I ask for the joy of love, and

when my flanks are exhausted I sleep where

my body falls.

In the morning, I opened my eyelids and I

shudder in my hair. A dove is

on my windowsill; I asked it what month

it was. She said to me, “It is the month when

women are in love.”

Ah! Whatever the month, the dove spoke

truly, Kypris! And I throw my two arms

around my lover, and with much

trembling I pull to the foot of the bed my

Legs, still numb.

154 – THE MORNING RAIN

Night wears on. The stars disappear.

Here are the last courtesans

going home with their lovers. And me, in the

morning rain, I wrote these verses on the sand.

The leaves are full of sparkling water.

That streams across the footpath,

soaking the earth and the dead leaves.

The rain, drop by drop, makes holes

in my song.

Oh! How sad and alone I am and here! The

youngest don’t look at me; the oldest

forget me. But it’s good. They and the children of their

children are learning my verses,

There is something about which neither Myrtale, nor Thais, nor Glykera

tell themselves, the day when their beautiful cheeks

become hollow. Those who love after me

will sing my stanzas together.

155 — DEATH

Aphrodite! Unpitiable goddess, you wished

that on me also the happiness of long-haired

youth should disappear in a few days.

How is it I am not dead entirely!

I looked at myself in the mirror: I no longer

had neither smiles nor tears. Oh sweet face

that loved Mnasidika, I cannot believe that you

were mine!

Could it be that it’s all finished? I no longer have

[?’vecu’?] five times eight years, it seems to me

that I was born yesterday, and already here is

what I must say: They will love me no more.

All my hair cut off, I twisted it

into my girdle and I offer it to you eternal

Kypris! I shall not cease to adore you.

This is the last verse of the pious

Bilitis.

156 – FIRST EPITAPH

In the country where springs are born of the

sea, and where the riverbed is made of

sheets of rock, I, Bilitis, was born.

My mother was Phoenician; my father

Damophylos, Greek. My mother taught me

the songs of Byblos, sad as the

first dawn.

I adored Astarte in Kypris. I knew

Psappha in Lesbos. I sang as I loved.

If I have [?‘bien vecu’?], Passer-by, tell it

to your daughter.

And don’t sacrifice for me a black goat;

but, in sweet libation, press her teats

on my tomb.

157 – SECOND EPITAPH

On the sombre banks of the Melas, at Tamassos of

Pamphylia, I, daughter of Damophylos, Bilitis,

was born. I rest far from my country, as you can see.

Whilst still a child, I learned the loves of Adonis [l’Adon] and of Astarte,

the mysteries of the sacred Syrie (?) and

Death and the return to

She-With-The-Rounded-Eyes.

If I was a courtesan, what blame is there in that?

Was it not my duty as a woman?

Stranger, the Mother-Of-All-Things guides us.

To misunderstand that is not prudent.

In gratitude to you who have stopped, I

wish you this destiny: Strive to be loved,

not to love. Goodbye. Remember in your

old age, that you have seen my tomb.

158 – LAST EPITAPH

Under the black leaves of the laurels, under

the beloved flowers of roses, it is here that

I am lying, I who interwove verse

Upon verse to make embraces flourish.

I grew up in the land of the Nymphs; I have

[‘vecu’] in the isle of friends; I am dead in

the Isle of Kypris. That is why my name is

illustrated and my stele rubbed with oil.

Do not cry for me, you who stop: they gave me

a beautiful funeral, the mourners

raked their cheeks; they lay my

mirrors and my necklaces in my tomb.

And now, on the pale prairies

of asphodel, I walk, an impalpable

shade, and the memory of my earthly

Life is the joy of my existence under the ground.

The Songs of Bilitis (Continued)

03 Sunday Jun 2012

Posted by astyages in Astyages

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

Bilitis, lesbos, mnasidika, pamphylia, pittakos, sapphic poetry, sappho, the bucolic life in pamphylia, the songs of bilitis

Louÿs claimed that the erotic poems he fabricated were the work of “Bilitis,” one of Sappho’s lovers; he even invented a biography of the woman, citing a fictional archaeologist named Herr G. Heim with discovering her tomb. (“Herr G. Heim” translates roughly to “Lord S. Ecret”). Despite the hoax, many critics consider it a work of literary merit, and it’s become something of a cult book among queer theory enthusiasts.

The Songs of Bilitis  by  Pierre Louys

Translated by David L Rowlands

The Bucolic Life in Pamphylia (Part 2)

23 – SONG: SHADOW OF THE WOODS

“Shadow of the woods where she must come”, said I,

Where has my mistress gone?”

“She has gone down to the plain.”

“Plain, where has my mistress gone?”

“She followed the banks of the river.”

“Beautiful river who saw her pass, tell me,

Is she near here?”

“She left me for the path.”

“Path, can you still see her?”

“She left me for the road.”

“Oh, white road, road to the town, tell me,

Where did you take her?”

“To the golden street which enters Sardis.”

“Oh street of light, can you feel her naked feet?”

“She has entered the palace of the king.”

“Oh palace, splendour of the world, give her to me!”

“Look, she has necklaces on her breast and

hoops in her hair, a hundred pearls the length of her legs,

And two arms around her shapely body.”

24 – LYKAS

Come, we shall go into the fields, under the

juniper bushes; we shall eat

honey in the rushes, we shall make traps

for grasshoppers with stalks of asphodel.

Come, we shall go to see Lykas, who guards

his father’s flocks on the peaks of the

shadowy Taurus range. Surely he will give us

some milk.

I can already hear the sound of his flute. He is a

very skilful player. Here are the dogs and the

lambs, and himself, standing under a tree.

Isn’t he as handsome as Adonis!

Oh, Lykas, give us some milk. Here are some

figs from our fig-trees. We are going to stay

with you. Bearded billy-goats, don’t leap about, for

fear of exciting the restless nanny-goats.

25 – THE OFFERING TO THE GODDESS

It is not for Artemis that one adores

Pergamus, this garland woven by my hands,

although Artemis is a good goddess who

keeps me safe in difficult times.

It is not for Athena that one adores

Sidon, although she is of ivory and gold and

she carries in her hand a pomegranate

which tempts the birds.

No, it is for Aphrodite whom I worship

in my breast, because she alone gives me

that which my lips miss, if I hang

my garland of tender roses from her

sacred tree.

But I shall not speak too loudly of that which I

beseech her to grant me. I shall stretch myself up on

the tips of my toes and through a cleft in

the bark I shall confide my secret.

26 – THE AGREEABLE FRIEND

The storm lasted all night. Selenis, of the

beautiful hair, had come to spin with me. She

stayed from fear of the mud. We had

heard the prayers and were squeezed one against

the other… we filled my little bed.

When girls sleep in pairs, sleep

stays at the door. “Bilitis, tell me,

tell me who you love.” She slid

her arm against mine to caress me

softly.

And she said, in front of my mouth: “I know,

Bilitis, who you love. Close your eyes, I

am Lykas.” I replied as I touched her: “Do

I not see very well that you are a girl? Your

joke is pointless.

But she replied: “In truth, I am Lykas,

if you close your eyelids. Here are his arms,

there are his hands…” And tenderly, in the

silence, she enchanted my dreams with a

singular illusion.

27 – PRAYER TO PERSEPHONE

Purified by the ritual ablutions, and

clothed in violet tunics, we have

kissed the earth our hands full of

olive branches.

“Oh, Subterranean Persephone, or whatever name

you desire, if the name agrees with you,

listen to us oh Hair of Darkness. Barren,

Unsmiling Queen.

“Kokhlis, daughter of Thrasymachos, is ill,

and dangerously. Do not call her back

yet. You know she cannot escape you:

One day, later, you will take her.

“But don’t drag her away so quickly, O Invisible

tyrant, because she mourns the loss of her virginity.

She beseeches you through our prayers, and we

give three black unshorn ewes to save her.”

28 – THE KNUCKLEBONES PARTY

As we both loved to do, we

played knucklebones. And this was

a memorable game. Lots of young girls

assisted.

Her first throw gained her the Cyclops, and

I won Solon. But she won

Kallibolos, and, feeling myself lost, I

prayed to the goddess.

I played. I had Epiphenon, she the terrible

Chios, I, the Antiteukhos, she the

Trikhias, and I Aphrodite which won

this lover’s dispute.

But seeing her pale, I took her by the neck

and I spoke very close to her ear (so that only she could hear),

“Don’t worry my little friend.

We shall let them choose between the two of us”

29 – THE DISTAFF

For the whole day my mother had shut me up in

the girls’ school, with my sisters, who I don’t like and

who speak amongst themselves in low voices.

In a little corner, I spun my distaff.

Distaff, as I am alone with you,

it is to you that I shall speak. With your

wig of white wool you are like an

old woman. Listen to me.

If I could, I would not be here,

sitting in the shadow of the wall spinning with

boredom: I would be lying among the violets

on the slopes of the Taurus mountains.

As he is poorer than I am, my mother

does not want him to marry me. And nevertheless, I

shall tell you: or I will not see the wedding-day

where it will be he who carries me across the

threshold.

30 – PAN’S FLUTE

For Hyacinthus Day, he gave me

a flute made of tall reeds,

held together with white wax which is sweet to

my lips, like millet.

He is teaching me to play, sitting on his knees;

but I am trembling a little. He plays it

after me, so softly that I can hardly hear.

We have nothing to say to each other, so close

are we to each other; but our songs

want to respond, and turn and turn about our

mouths unite on the flute.

It is late, here is the song of the green frogs

which starts with the onset of night. My mother

will never believe that I stayed so long

to look for my lost girdle…

31 – THE HAIRSTYLE

He said to me: “Last night I had a dream.

I had your hair around my neck.

I had your hair like a black necklace around

the nape of my neck and on my chest.

I caressed it, and it was mine; and

we were thus tied together forever, by the

same hair, mouth on mouth, in the manner of

two laurels which often have but one root.

And bit by bit, it seemed to me, our

limbs were so entangled, that I was becoming

you or that you were entering into me like my

soul.

When he had finished, he gently put his

hands on my shoulders, and he looked at me

with a look so tender, that I kissed his eyes

with a shiver.

32 – THE CUP

Lykas saw me coming, clad only in a

brief shift, because the days were

stifling; he wanted to mould my breast which

was still uncovered.

He took some fine potter’s clay, kneaded in cold water

and light. When he had pressed it onto

my skin, I thought I would faint, so cold

was this clay.

From the mould of my breast, he made a cup,

rounded and stemmed. He put it to dry

in the sun and painted it purple and

ochre, pressing flowers into it all around.

Then we went up to the spring

that was sacred to the nymphs, and we

threw the cup into the current, with

stalks of gillyflowers.

33 – ROSES IN THE NIGHT

As night mounted the sky, the world

was ours and the Gods’. We’re going to the

fields at the spring, the dark woods with

clearings where we guided our naked feet.

The brilliant little stars enough for the

little shadows which are us. Sometimes,

under the low branches, we find

sleeping deer.

But the most charming part of the night above all

else was a place known to us alone and

which drew us across the forest: a thicket

of mysterious roses.

Because nothing on earth is so divine as

the perfume of roses in the night. How

was it that at times when I was alone I

felt no intoxication?

34 – REMORSE

At first I didn’t answer, and I had a

blush on my cheeks, and the beating of

my heart hurt within my breast.

Then I resisted, I said: “No! No!” I

turned my head away and the kiss did not

broach my lips, nor love my

clenched knees.

Then he asked my forgiveness, he caressed

my hair, I felt his burning breath,

and he was gone… Now I am alone.

I looked at the empty place, the deserted woods, the

trodden earth. And I bit my knuckles until they

bled and muffled my cries in the grass.

35 — THE BROKEN DREAM

All alone I was sleeping, like a

partridge in the heather. The light breeze,

The sound of the waters, the sweetness of the night

kept me there.

I was sleeping, an imprudent thing to do,

and I awoke with a cry. I struggled, and

I wept; but already it was too late.

What can the arms of a woman do?

He didn’t leave me. On the contrary,

More tenderly in his arms he clasped me to

Him and I saw nothing more in the world, neither earth nor

The trees but only the gleam of his eyes…

To you, victorious Kypris, I dedicate these

Offerings still moist, still pink; the traces

Of the sorrows of the virgin, the end of my

Dream and of my resistance.

36 – TO THE WASHERWOMEN

Washerwomen, do not say that you have seen me!

I trust myself to you; do not repeat it!

Between my tunic and my breast I brought you

Something.

I am like a frightened little chicken…

I don’t know if I dare to tell you… My

Heart beats like I shall die… it is a

Veil that I brought you.

A veil and the ribbons from my legs. You

See; there is blood. By Apollo it was

In spite of me! I was well defended; but

A man who loves is stronger than us.

Wash them well; spare neither salt nor

Chalk. I shall put four obols for you

At the feet of Aphrodite; and even

A silver drachma.

37 – SONG

When he returned, I hid my

Face with both hands. He said to me:

“Fear nothing. Who saw us embrace?” “Who

Saw us? The night and the moon.

“And the stars and the first light of dawn. The moon

Was admiring itself in the lake and told the water under

The willows. The water of the lake told the pole.

“And the pole told the boat and the boat

Told the fisherman. Alas! Alas! If that were

All! But the fisherman told a woman.

“The fisherman told a woman: my father and

my mother and my sisters, and

all of Hellas will know.”

38 – BILITIS

One woman envelopes herself in white wool.

Another clothes herself in silk and gold. Another

covers herself with flowers, with green leaves and

grapes.

I know only to live naked. My lover,

take me as I am: without robes nor jewels

nor sandals; here is Bilitis alone.

But my hair is black with its own blackness and my

lips red with their own redness. My curls

float around me, free and round

like feathers.

Take me just as my mother made me in

A night of love long ago, and if I please you

Then don’t forget to tell me.

39 — THE LITTLE HOUSE

The little house where his bed is, is the most

beautiful on earth. It is made with the

branches of trees, four walls of dry earth

and a garland of thatch.

I love it, because we lie there since the nights grew

cold; and the colder the night, the longer it is.

At the rise of day I feel myself finally weary.

The mattress is in the sun; two blankets

of black wool enclose our bodies which

are warming up again. His chest compresses my breasts.

My heart beats…

He enters me so hard that I thought he would break me, poor

little girl that I am; but while he is

in me I no longer know anything of the world, and

you could have cut off my four limbs without

waking me from my joy.

40 – JOY (not translated)

41 — THE LOST LETTER

Alas for me! I have lost his letter. I

had put it between my skin and my breast-band,

in the warmth of my breast. I ran; it fell.

I’m going to retrace my steps: if someone

found it, he would tell my mother and I

shall be whipped in front of my mocking sisters.

If it is a man who finds it, he will give it

back to me; or even, if he wanted to talk to me in

secret I know the means to charm him.

If it is a woman, who puts it up for sale, O Zeus

the Protector, protect me! Because she would tell

everybody, or she would take my lover.

42 – SONG

The night is so deep that it enters through

my eyes. – You could not see the way. You could

lose yourself in the forest.

The noise of the waterfalls fills my

ears. – You would not hear the voice of

your lover even if he was only twenty feet away.

The odour of the flowers is so strong that I

swoon and am about to fall. – You would not feel

them if they carpeted your path.

Ah! It is good, far from here, on the other

side of the mountain, but I see it and I

hear it and I feel it as if it were touching me.

43 – THE OATH

“When the water of the stream flows back up

to the snow-covered summits;

when we sow barley and wheat in

the moving furrows of the sea;

“when the pines sprout in the lakes and the

water-lilies on rocks, when the sun

becomes black, when the moon falls onto the grass.

“Then, but only then, will I take

another wife and forget you Bilitis,

soul of my life, heart of my heart.”

He said that to me! He said that to me! What matters

the rest of the world to me! Where are you, insane happiness

which can compare with my happiness!

44 — NIGHT

It is me now, looking for him again.

each night, very softly, I leave the

house, and I go by a long road,

to his meadow, to watch him sleep.

Sometimes I stay a long time without speaking,

happy just to see him, and I put my lips close

to his, to kiss only

his breath.

Then suddenly, I spread myself over him. He

wakes in my arms, and he can no longer

get back up because I wrestle with him! He submits, and laughs and

pleads with me. And so we played through the night.

… First dawn, Oh mischievous clarity, you already!

In what forever-nocturnal cavern, on

which subterranean meadow could we

love for so long, that we lose even your

memory…

45 – LULLABY (BERCEUSE: lit: ‘She who rocks the cradle’)

Sleep! I asked in Sardis for your toys, and

your clothes in Babylon. Sleep, you are the daughter

of Bilitis and of a king of the rising sun.

The woods, they are the palace in which we fought for

you alone and which I give you. The trunks

of the pines, these are its columns; the high

branches, these are its vaulted roof.

Sleep. So that he doesn’t wake you, I would sell

the sun to the sea. The wind from the wings of

a dove is not as light as your breath.

Daughter of mine, flesh of my flesh, you will tell me

when you open your eyes, if you want the

plain or the town, or the mountain or the

moon, or the white procession of the gods.

46 – THE TOMB OF THE NYADS

The length of the rime-covered woods, I

walked; the hair in front of my mouth was

blossoming with little icicles, and my

sandals were heavy with piled-up slush.

He said to me: “What are you looking for?” “I’m

on the tracks of a satyr. His cloven little footsteps

alternate like the holes in a white

shawl.” He said to me: “The Satyrs are dead.

“The satyrs and the nymphs too. In

thirty years we have not had a winter so

terrible. The footprint which you see is that of

a goat. But let us stay here, where their tomb is.”

And with the iron of his hoe he broke the ice

on the spring where once laughed the Nyads.

He took large cold pieces, and,

lifting them to the pale sky, looked through them.

***** ******* *****

The Life of Bilitis by Astyages

12 Saturday May 2012

Posted by astyages in Astyages

≈ 14 Comments

Some time ago Atomou felt the need to tell me what qualities he thought were necessary before one should ever attempt to translate anything from any other language into one’s own. I did not agree at the time, and still don’t. Since then I have briefly explained my disagreement, which is essentially the same as my disagreement with the orthodox dogma of the roman catholic church… the rigidity and inflexibility of orthodoxy is too limiting and rigid in itself at the same time as it refuses to allow the possibility of new interpretations. I did not, however, offer a full critique of what I referred to then (and still refer to) as his ‘diatribe’ on the art of translation; and I shall still refrain from doing so, however, as it’s been a long time since I’ve contributed anything, and as I’ve already ‘threatened’ to post my own translation of Bilitis, (which is the ONLY thing I have ever claimed to actually translate); it seems an appropriate time to post it; even though it risks being labelled ‘presumptuous’ or worse. You will note that I have not translated it from the Greek, but from the French language; the language of its author, who pretends instead to be the ‘discoverer’ of this ‘ancient’ text. I invite any and all piglets who feel interested enough to do so, to comment on my translation and the quality of my interpretation.

Perhaps, if I’m lucky, I may even draw Atomou back to the pub, if only to critique my work.

This first installment is my translation of Pierre Louys’ introduction to the ‘Songs of Bilitis’; I hope you will all enjoy

The Life of Bilitis

By

Pierre Louys

Translated from the French

by

David L Rowlands

THE SONGS OF BILITIS

A Lyrical novel

This little book about ancient love is dedicated respectfully to the young girls of the society of the future. (Pierre Louys)

Introduction: THE LIFE OF BILITIS

Bilitis was born at the beginning of the sixth century before our own era, in a mountain village situated on the border of Melas, to the east of Pamphylia. This country is dangerous and melancholy, darkened by deep forests, dominated by the enormous mass of the Taurus mountain ranges; petrifying springs emerge from the rock into large saltwater lakes; the heights and the valleys are full of silence.

She was the daughter of a Greek father and a Phoenician mother. She seems not to have known her father, because he is not mentioned anywhere in the memories of her childhood. Perhaps he was even dead before she came into the world. Otherwise one could hardly explain how she came to bear a Phoenician name, which only her mother could have given her.

In this nearly deserted land, she lived a peaceful life with her mother and her sisters. Other young girls, who were to become her friends, lived not far from there. On the wooded slopes of the Taurus range, shepherds grazed their flocks.

In the morning, at cockcrow, she rose, went to the stable, to water and milk the animals. During the day, if she wished, she could stay in the women’s quarters and spin wool. If the weather was fine, she could run in the fields and play with her friends the thousand games about which she tells us.

Bilitis had an ardent piety regarding the Nymphs. The sacrifices she offered were almost always for their spring. Often she even spoke to them, but it seems that she never saw them, to the degree that she recounts with veneration the memories of an old man which otherwise would have been surprising.

The end of her pastoral existence was made sorrowful by a love affair which we know a good bit about because she spoke of it at length. She stopped singing about it when it became unhappy. Having become the mother of a child whom she abandoned, Bilitis left Pamphylia, under mysterious circumstances, and never dreamed again of the place of her birth.

We find her again at Mytilene where she had come by the sea route along the beautiful coast of Asia. She was scarcely sixteen years old, according to the conjectures of M. Heim, who plausibly established some dates in the life of Bilitis, taken from a verse which makes allusion to the death of Pittakos.

Lesbos was then the center of the world. Halfway between beautiful Attica and the ostentation of Lydia, she had as her capital, a city more enlightened than Athens, and more corrupt than Sardis: Mytilene, built on a peninsula in sight of the coast of Asia. The blue sea surrounded the town. From the height of the temples one could distinguish on the horizon the white line of Atarnia, which was the port of Pergamus.

The streets, narrow and crowded by the resplendent multitude dressed in multi-colored fabrics, tunics of purple and hyacinth, cyclases (a kind of sleeveless surcoat)of transparent silks, bassaras (a type of mantle or great-cloak) dragging in the dust stirred up by yellow shoes. The women wore large golden rings strung with rough pearls in their ears, and on their arms massive bracelets of silver roughly carved in relief. Even the men had shining heads of well-coiffed hair. Through the open doors could be heard the joyful sounds of instruments, the cries of the women, and the noise of the dances. Pittakos, who wanted to give a bit of order to this perpetual debauch, even passed a law which forbade flute-players who were too tired being employed in the nocturnal festivities; but this law was never severe.

In a society where the husbands are so busy at night with wine and the dancers, the women were inevitably forced to reconcile themselves to find among themselves some consolation for their solitude. with the result that they softened to those delicate amours, to which antiquity has already given their name, and which they maintain; what they thought of men was more true passion than faulty research.

Sappho was still beautiful. Bilitis knew her, and she speaks to us about her under the name of Psappha which she used in Lesbos. Undoubtedly this was what made this admirable woman, who taught young Pamphylians the art of singing in rhythmic phrases, preserve for posterity the memory of these dear beings. Unhappily Bilitis gives little detail about this figure which is today so poorly known and this is cause for regret because the least word touching the great Inspiratrice is precious. In revenge she has left us some thirty elegies, the history of her own friendship with a young girl of her own age who she names Mnasidika, and who lived with her. Already we know the name of this young girl from a verse of Sappho’s where her beauty is exalted; but the name was doubtful, and Bergk was near to thinking that she was simply called Mnais. The songs one reads further prove that this hypothesis must be abandoned. Mnasidika seems to have been a small girl, very sweet and very innocent, one of those charming beings who have for their mission to let themselves be adored, so much more cherished are they that they make less effort to merit that which is given them. Love without reason lasts longest; this one lasted for ten years. We shall see how it was broken off through Bilitis’ fault, whose excessive jealousy failed to understand the least eclecticism.

When she felt that nothing was left for her in Mytilene except unhappy memories, Bilitis made a second voyage: she went to Cyprus, a Greek and Phoenician island like Pamphylia herself and which must have often reminded her of her native country.

So it was that Bilitis recommenced her life for the third time and in a way of which it would be more difficult to make admission if one has not yet understood at which point love became a sacred thing among the ancient peoples. The courtesans of Amathonte were not like our own, creatures in disgrace, exiled from all worldly society; they were girls from the best families in the city, and who thanked Aphrodite for the beauty which she had given them, and consecrated in service to her cult this recognized beauty. All the towns which possessed, like those of Cyprus, a temple rich in courtesans had in the regard of these women the same respectful care.

The incomparable history of Phryne, which Athena has transmitted to us, will give some idea of a real veneration. It is not true that Hyperidas needed to go naked to persuade the Areopagus and nevertheless, the crime was great: she had killed. The orator only tears the top of his tunic and reveals only his breast. And he supplicates the Judges “not to put to death the priestess and those inspired by Aphrodite”. On the contrary the other courtesans went out wearing clothing of transparent silk through which may be seen all the details of their bodies. Phryne was costumed so that even her hair was enveloped in great pleated vestments whose grace the figurines of Tanagra has preserved. No-one, if it were not her friends, ever saw her arms, nor her shoulders, and never would she be seen in the public baths. But one day something extraordinary happened. This was the day of the feast of Eleusis, twenty mule persons, who came from every country in Greece, were assembled on the beach, when Phryne advanced close to the waves: She removed her clothing, she undid her girdle, she even removed her under-tunic, “she let down her hair and entered into the sea”. And in this crowd there were Praxiteles, who after this living goddess drew the “Aphrodite of Cnidus” and Apelle who half-lived in the form of his “Anadyomene”. Admirable people, in front of whom beauty could be displayed nude without exciting laughter or false shame [fausse honte].

I would like this history to be that of Bilitis, because, in translating her Songs, I was seized by a love for the friend of Mnasidika. Without doubt her life was also totally marvellous. I regret only that I have not spoken further and that the ancient authors, those at least we have surveyed, are so lacking in information about her. Philodemus, who plundered her twice, doesn’t even mention her name. In default of pretty stories, I pray that one would really like to content oneself with the details which she gives us herself on her life as a courtesan. She was a courtesan, that is undeniable; and even her last songs prove that if she had the virtues of her vocation, she also had its worst weaknesses. But I do not wish to know only her virtues. She was pious, and even practicing. She lived faithfully at the temple, such that Aphrodite consented to prolong the youth of her purest worshipper. The day she ceased to be loved, she stopped writing, she says. Nevertheless, it is difficult to admit that the songs of Pamphylia were written in the period they were about. How was a little shepherdess from the mountains able to learn how to scan her verses which depended on the difficult rhythms of the Aeolian tradition? It seems more plausible that, on growing old, she could no longer sing for herself the memories of her distant childhood. We know nothing about this last period of her life. We do not even know at what age she died.

Her tomb was rediscovered by M G Heim at Palaeo-Limisso, beside an ancient road, not far from the ruins of Amathonte. These ruins had virtually disappeared for over thirty years, and perhaps the stones of the house where Bilitis lived today pave the quays of Port Said. But the tomb was underground, according to Phoenician custom and it escaped tomb-robbers [voleurs du tresor]. M. Heim penetrated a narrow shaft, filled with earth, at the bottom of which he encountered a walled door which he had to demolish. The cavern, spacious and low, paved with flagstones of marble, had four walls lined with a veneer of black amphibolite, where there were graven in primitive capitals all the songs which we are about to read, as well as three epitaphs which decorated the sarcophagus.

It was there where reposed the friend of Mnasidika, in a large coffin of baked earth, under a cover modeled by a delicate statuary which was figured in potters clay, her death-mask: her hair was painted black, the eyes half-shut and lengthened with pencil as if she were living and the cheeks artfully adorned with a light smile which emphasized the lines of the mouth. Nothing more would ever be said by these lips, at once clear and well-defined, soft and fine, united the one with the other, as if they had drunkenly come together. The celebrated traits of Bilitis were often reproduced by the artists of Ionia, and the Louvre Museum possesses a baked-earth tablet from Rhodes which is her most perfect monument, after the bust by Lanarka.

When the tomb was opened, she appeared in a pose with one hand piously arranged, twenty-four centuries previously. Vials of perfumes were hanging from earthen pegs, and one of these, even after such a long time, still smelled sweet. The polished silver mirror in which Bilitis saw herself and the stylus which had traced the blue on her eyelids were discovered in their proper places. A little nude statue of Astarte, a relic never so precious, keeping perpetual vigil over the ornate skeleton and all her jewels of gold and white, like snow-laden branches but so soft and fragile that at the moment they were gently touched they turned to dust.

PIERRE LOUYS

Constantine, August 1894.

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