By some guy who handed me a brown paper envelope in the Pig’s Arms Car Park.

REF: XlCapri22sk888threefatladies 15:2820101210

Pig’s Arms Kitchen.

Classification: Top Secret

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To my darling daughters,

As requested here is my very special roast pork dish.  You will need to get your butcher to bone out the best part of  a prime shoulder of pork and butterfly it.

Next, prepare the stuffing:

Soak 15 dried apricots for about half an hour then chop them all up.

In a bowl mix together the chopped apricots, about 12 prunes (or you can used dates), two very finely chopped shallots, half a cup of ground almonds, salt and pepper.  You will need to moisten this mixture with some water so that it all sticks together nicely.

Spread out on one side of the pork about a third of the way in.  Cut about six lengths of real string and space evenly under the pork.   Carefully roll up and then tie the strings firmly.

Roast in the usual way with potatoes and pumpkin pieces etc.  When you think the pork is about ready give it a few gentle pricks.   The pork should take about one and half hours to cook, leave it in warm oven to rest while you make the gravy (keep it light).

You are free to pass this on to your children when the time is right but it is best kept as women’s business as I’m sure the blokes would bugger it up.

With love,

Mum (not his real name)