Inquisitor General Abbott
Inquisitional Mischief by Warrigal – and a share of the Bullshit
From developments today, we can clearly see what happens when there is carelessness in the handing of the chemicals in the darkroom.
Against the prevailing play, the great inquisitor, the big tomato himself, has hit the overdrive button and miraculously eclipsed the great Malester.
I was looking over past political posts and I notice how convincing Julie looks as a faithful sidekick. Now she’s really going to have to put the boxing gloves on and get on her bicycle.
And our old mate Joe the Hock has graciously eaten of the humble pie and joined the ranks of the Brendans and Mals with a new seat up in the nose-bleed section of Parliament – so expertly kept warm by the world’s former third greatest Treasurer.
Tony Abbott at his press conference today is alleged to have said that he will introduce parliamentary uniforms in keeping with the status and power of relevant LNP parliamentarians.
He said, “I grew up in a regimented environment and prospered well in the uniformed cloisters of Riverview where boys of good Catholic character were systematically rogered then sent to play rugger in the rain. Those that survived thrived. I’ve always thought well of a man in uniform since those days.”
“Pell’s Man in Hell” or the “Catholic in Canberra”, as the sometime altarboy and erstwhile pugilist likes to be called, has had a very special uniform run up just for him. It includes an overly snug genital gusset with internal spikes so he can atone on the run. It also includes a snappy little mitre inscribed, with a nod to “Apocalypse Now”, (the notion not the film), “Death From Above” which is how our wannabe Inquisitor General likes it.
Abbott is convinced that should he get the search and seizure powers he’s looking for, he’ll “have more power than the old Egg Marketing Board”.
This seemed to make him very happy.
So where to from here ? Several instances of Tony being put in the pound until the medication takes effect, followed by a massive electoral defeat followed by a closely fought leadership battle between Christopher Pyne and Bronwyn Bishop’s hairdresser ?
Who knows ? But the term “bizarre” has grown a huge new meaning. I’m interested in how many Libs who cross the floor on ETS are not going to come out after they see the great Inquisitor.
Window Dresser's Arms, Pig & Whistle 
Try him in yellow crocheted speedos, Warrigal.
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That’s one great picture, Warrigal! How did the walkabout go? Find anywhere interesting?
I’ve put my thoughts on this subject up on the dot yesterday if anyone’s interested in my interpretation of current events and my prediction of future ones… since we all appear to be playing ‘Oracles’…
😉
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Don’t write of Malc yet.
It will take a few weeks for Abbott to settle in, or not, as the case may be.
I confess to being ignorant of Australian political rules, but I can’t see that this result will be stabilising.
Turnbull has proved a point about his character and his concern for the planet. Now whether that is faux concern or not is subject to conjecture depending on one’s political bent.
I imagine that he has endeared himself now to younger voters–and that may indeed auger interesting changes in political divides.
He rang me and said, “I’ll be back”!
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I agree, Jules. I have to admit reluctant admiration for Mal in staring the bastards down – and Abbott winning by a margin of 1 – when they prevented Fran whatsername (a moderate) from voting, and another one voting for neither Mal or Tony – is hardly a ringing endorsement.
But I suspect that Mal has no patience for fuckwits and will probably take a walk – by not nominating for Wentworth again – if not walking out before then.
Same should go for Joe Hockey – or he might take a doze on the back bench until Tony blows up.
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He may also view all this as unfinished business.
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Good mischief from Warrigal too!
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Tony Abbott has performed a miracle already. Helvi’s picture has emerged again.
Alleluhah. Please say your prayers and keep your hands above the blankets tonight.
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So pleased to see me up there again! What happened?
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He will be remembered for his stance on ‘being humbled and daunted’ but forever haunted by his remark on a dying man ” just because a man is sick doesn’t mean he is pure of heart”.
Can it possibly get any worse?
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They are a rabble, my bet is they will get Howard back
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John or Jeanette?
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I watched the show on ABC this morning and when I found out it was Abbott that got in,I started laughing hysterically, this was all I could do; this is going back to the fifties, this is a joke, this can’t be happening in 2009! I’m sure most of the Aussies are with me; Abbott can’t last…
I also think that Julie B is in a desperate need of a new hairdresser.
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Me, too, H! Couldn’t control myself! And when I found out about the votes, I thought it was a joke. The Fates are toying with this lot! One fluffed vote and one missing? What cruel joke is this? Like you said, the end of 2009 and we still see such political slapstick?
I think Julie B was born with that hairdo and with that hairdo she will die! Many of these pollies treat such symbols as part of their persona, their public ID and even go as far as insure them. They think that people won’t recognise them in any other getup. Stupid and vain but true!
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Hung, I posted on on Dave’s Unleashed Red Jumper Blog that I had heard that there was a two-pronged attack – one team have dug up Menzies and are giving him the kiss of life. The other have taken up scuba lessons off Portsea.
it’s THAT desperate.
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Good lines Emmjay. Go down well on “The 7pm Project”. I wonder if they have writers, or if they do their own stuff.
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My goodness, Voice, it shows what a cloistered world I inhabit. Is this 7pm Project something that exists outside the ABC and SBS ?
Compliment noted and appreciated ! Ta.
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You intellectual types! Basically, Emmjay, it is a news-ish program that features a panel composed of some of the second latest wave of Australian comedians, and guest panellists. Channel 10. Don’t ask me what time it is on or I will have to shoot you. (That goes for you too Hung. And the rest of you lot).
Come to think of it, Channnel 10 has Paul McDermot’s news-ish program now too. They seem to have decided to buy over a lot of comedians who used to be seen more often on the ABC.
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There’s no way I can watch ch. 10 Voice. Same as the missus. We get to near puking with them commercial wannabes. If it ain’t on ABC and SBS it ain’t edible!
I agree with emjo. Turnbul -like me- can’t entertain fools. He gives them all he’s got and if they don’t want it, he’ll go somewhere else. Not worth it.
The Hocks is foolish and naive enough to have another go but I think his constituents might send him some alternate advice: You’re a woos, Hocks, so get back to your delicatessen.
The Libs are now stuck big time.
The word from “my people” is that there are no young Libs of any worth either. The new species is a very nihilistic one. Their branch meetings are usually an excuse to do drugs. They simply couldn’t give a stuff. At least not the ones that count. That lot is too busy getting a law or commerce degree and the work at uni is increasingly demanding. No time to play politics. What’s left is the lot that want cheap and easy sex. Alas, it’s getting bad.
On the other camp -not a euphemism- the members are usually arts students or union reps and their number is getting smaller by the day. An arts student can be a great political being if s/he puts in the hard yakka; and the political yakka is getting harder by the day because of diminishing membership, diminishing incentives and diminishing returns.
The third and better nurtured camp is that of the Greens which, somehow, gets the better, intellectually and politically, more discerning young person from all stratas of life, with greater incentive, better prospects of success, moreinspired, more tenacious, more hard working. An impressive change is in the bush, apparently. The younger men and women are being attracted to the Greens in droves.
It’ll take a couple more elections but the time will come when both parties will become shadows of their old self and the Greens will be a dominant force.
The cycle will come about again, of course, where both major parties will shift their ground a little to the left and we’ll be back into the old rut again but there will be a reasonably long period of some sensible politics.
Apollo’s pythia at Delphi has spoken. Her words are infallible.
Heed the words of the pythia!
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