Tags

screen-shot-2015-03-07-at-6-21-45-pm

From the Pig’s Arms Daylight Saving Expert, Sunny Afternoon

The Minister for Climate Change, Peter Dunny announced today in late breaking news that Australia was going to experience our first darkness-free day.

The Minister “Has taken advice from the Bureau of Solar Technology and Polo that Australia has saved sufficient daylight that we are in a position to cash it in and experience a day of zero night”.

“Australians have shown that we are a resourceful nation, more than capable of three word slogans including working hard, saving and investing and I am pleased to announce that on Friday, nobody will need to go home and have a snooze – the working week will end at about 8:00pm on Saturday – from next Friday going forward”.

“Our government has taken this bold decision based on record low interest rates – nobody is interested in Fridays anymore – so in response we will remove that productivity impediment otherwise known as Friday night”.

Sauces close to the barbecue were unavailable for comment, but the leader of the guys who are not the government or really not even the government in waiting, said some stuff that trailed off in a whimper, went and sat down and got back to his copy of “The Idiot’s Guide to Motivation”.

The Prime Minister checked the back of his pantaloons to see whether he, himself was still radiant and was reassured of an as yet unblemished “the word opposite to shadow”.