
Portrait Of Confident Mature Male Doctor Standing In Front Of American Flag – borrowed with thanks from some place
Story by Emmjay
… after a week of self-medication with asthma puffers and nasal lavage for a nasty sinus infection and a persistent chunky cough, on the day before Christmas Eve, I decided that enough was enough and I would chance my luck in the hands of the dreaded American (Hawaiian) medical industry.
I am absolutely not saying I got a virus on a 9-hour sardine tin Jetstar flight full of school kids. No way would I suggest that was the case.
But I was worried that since we were set to fly home on the 27th of December, that I was becoming too unwell to fly – breathing being one of my favourity things.
It was about 8:00 pm and I wandered down to the hotel reception and asked them how to see a doctor. They gave me a nicely printed card introducing the services of a clan of peripatetic medicos who would deign to attend me in my room. Man ! What service.
For some reason I had soaked up the understanding that it was going to cost a couple of hundred dollars to see a GP and being at death’s door, what could go wrong with that ? After all, if it turned out for the worst there would simply be a little less in my already bare-arsed estate.
The man of medical science – a Korean man, he was – arrived about an hour later. He peered down my throat, felt my enraged sub-maxilliary glands and listened to my chest (not with a stethoscope – he just listened) and said that in the interests of nailing my ailments quickly, he wanted to inject twice into my buttocks and once into my arm.
He nominated an industrial grade antibiotic, a steroid and an anti-inflammatory. Honestly he could have wanted to remove my lungs and have them dry-cleaned and I’d have agreed – I was feeling (searches for most appropriate description)… totally shithouse.
He mixed up the antibiotic cocktail, thoughtfully adding a tad of somethingcaine because injected antibiotics hurt otherwise.
It was at this time, FM (who was somewhat under the hammer herself) inquired as to the likely size of our investment in American voodoo. He was a bit evasive, indicating, I was led to believe, that the bill would be made up by his employer – somewhere in Florida. He got us to confirm that we had travel insurance and he was adamant that we would have no trouble being recompensed.
I mean he’s got a medical degree from the University of Seoul – he’s no dummy. He ought to be able to do a little mental arithmetic and add up the bill roughly. So FM tried to assist him.
“Will it be in the hundreds ?” He looked shocked. “Thousands, then ?” she persisted.
“Low thousands” he said. “Oh, great”, my smarting arse said.
He completed delivering the other two liquid miracles into my saggy muscles and the bill came in from Florida via an Email.
The break up of the bill was this – in round (very round) US$s:
- Dropping by: $450
- Diagnosis $200
- Giving injections: $200
- The antibiotics: $675
- Sterioid: $575
- Anti-inflamm $575
- Tablets (6) $200
Grand total – US$2,875 – or a tad less than A$4,000.
No wonder sick Americans crawl over the border to Mexico or Canada – all hail Medicare and the Australian pharmaceutical benefits scheme !
I have to say I was shitting blue lights at that stage and increased my mortgage to cover the MasterCard hit.
Next morning, in a lather, I read the fine print on our travel insurance. They said I had to phone their 7 X 24 helpline. So I did. The good folks at NRMA sounded very re-assuring. I had interrupted their Christmas dinner, but nothing for them was too much trouble.
They said the most important thing was to get better and that I would need to get my GP to write them a letter to confirm my trouble wasn’t a pre-existing condition. He did, and they paid up 8 days later less $100 excess.
I was, and remain unhappy with the hotel for pointing me in the home visit direction – which probably added US$1,000 to the cost of simply walking down to a local clinic. The hotel people probably wanted to minimise the risk of me seeing a witch doctor and suing the hotel. Had I called the helpline first, the NRMA people could have pointed me to one (an accredited clinic, not a witch doctor) – but then one probably doesn’t make the best decisions when one is coughing up bits of lung.
Just a word of warning – unless you’re leaking claret all over the floor with multiple gunshot wounds and broken bones (an every day event in America, it seems), DO NOT GO TO THE EMERGENCY DEPARTMENT OF AN AMERICAN HOSPITAL. That is infinitely more expensive … “Mother’s maiden name ?” – $100. “I’m sorry, how do you spell that ? Another $100….. sparkling or still oxygen ?
Just by the by … a month later I’m still recovering – it’s apparently some North American super virus that also attacks the gut as well as the respiratory tract. That – or the industrial grade antibiotic killed all my gut flora and some other pathogens moved in. I feel a lot better, and hope to be in top form before this year’s City to Surf. (No way am I running…. it’s just a November date reference)
But what a joy it was to return to Australia. To my own GP and be bulk billed. And then have to fork out for the medicines – TENS of DOLLARS !
May the goddess bless our South Sea paradise.
… I forgot to thank the lovely Australian lady who apologised for overhearing my discussion with the hotel manager the next day “Sir, we never recommend doctors”, “Really ? What would you suggest your printed card was, if not a recommendation ?”
That kind Australian lady offered to give me some of her stash of Australian amoxicillin – to tide me over, but I was already medicated to the gills. Bless her for her thoughtfulness, generosity and kindness.
Always amazed when americans continue to claim they have the best medical system in the world… should have seen the bill I got when my first child ended up in hospital for a week before i had any insurance. That was back in 1990 but it was very nearly a life-disabling set back. Healthcare continues to be a hot button and I do think the republicans (if they ever get back in power) will have the fight of their life getting people to give up their Obamacare.
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Cor, boss! Core, I meant, here’s the core of it. An apple lest I be repeating ourselves works wonders. If it’s tummy, grated and gone brown is the exception to the rule of simply eating it holus bolus. Don’t try to swallow like a big pill ever though.
Thanks. TIA, I mean.
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Glad to hear you are Ok Emmjay. This is health care in America. Touch wood you didn’t break a bone or have a serious condition which would have resulted in hospitalisation for a long period. This friend, professor of physiology, retired now, used to go to the United States for conferences back in the ‘90s. He said to me after returning from one such trip, “Thank God for Gough Whitlam… In America, if you turn up at the emergency department with a knife sticking out of your belly, the FIRST question they ask you is ‘do you have a medical insurance?’ If you say no, and if they see you are not dying yet, they tell the ambulance driver to take him to the next hospital.” This one time incident was told to him by an American doctor at the conference foyer.
Next time, go to Canada 🙂
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Thanks for your kind words, hph. I’m relieved there was no cutlery involved. The thing that worries me a bit is whether I am starting to face the “too effing old to travel hard” years. I have a hankering for South America – after Emmlet I went there for a few weeks – but the priority list is long (including more of Italy, Spain, Japan, Greece, more of France and Germany, Ireland). Sadly all of these places are a damned way away,
Also considering a few weeks of Buddhist pilgrimage in India – which has the twin virtues of not being as far away as Europe and being far far less expensive.
I’m pretty sure our tropical island days are over. Hand me the mozzie repellent, please.
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Yes Emmjay. “Those were the days my friend” 🙂 I’m not young anymore. These days, I prefer to drive through beautiful forests and scenic mountains than to trek. Sometimes a short walk to the fence in the back yard is enough for me. 🙂
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Just don’t get sick overseas. Or don’t go there again, maybe. Echuca next time.
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I’ll keep that in mind here in Bali Emm. Who knows what I’d get for four grand.
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Bizarre and appalling, yet there are many Americans who oppose Obama’s health care for all. One of the young girls at work just spent ten days in the US. A few hours of that time was spent in a medical centre (not emergency). Around $3000 for an IV cannula, two litres of saline, no medication, and observations for four hours. There was a surcharge of a few hundred bucks, as it was a public holiday, yet doctors and nurses don’t get penalty rates!
Anyhoo, get better soon. Bloody Americans.
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Big M, the same Prof. friend told me that in their system, 70% of the doctors in the United States are/were ‘specialists.’ They, and the medical insurance companies along with Big Pharma, are the ones opposing free Universal Health Care cover. I’m sure you must have seen Michael Moore’s Sicko.
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