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How people find this shit funny is beyond me


Well there is a buzz around the Arms tonight, buzz, buzz, kabang! Sorry, that was a fly, anyway, Hung here, tonight Gordon is going to drop in with a special guest, unknown at this stage. Even I don’t know and I’m the author, well sort of. Now would I lie to you?

The door swings open and in walks Gordon, one of his magic tricks he loves, opening the door without touching the handle, bloody miracle worker that guy, hmm.

“Where’s ya guest?” asks Merv.

“He’s still in make up at this stage” replies Gordon.

“Wheeze was getting all excited, like the good old days”

“The good old days were actually pretty shitty but I’m glad you are excited, finally”

PA’ XI 1863-Won Grand Final by a fingertip

quips Gordon.

“So have you made him up yet Gordon?” enquires Angler.

“Hmm, now that you ask no, so I’ll do what the pollies do and create a distraction.”

Again, the front door opens but this time it’s a funny looking man in a cap with a black uniform.

The Colonel in better days

“I’m Colonel Wilhelm Wafflekurgenburger from the Licker Licensing Board attached to the Inner Cyberian Pleece. My friends call me The Nasty. Your Licker Licence please.”

“So what about your enemies then, wadda they call you, Bozo the Clown?” calls Merv and much mirth displayed by the crew.

“They, my friend are all shall we say inconvenienced.”

Gulp! Never seen a character like this before at the Arms, must be the warming thingy.

Well Merv had never seen a licker licence before so he had no idea. Just when it was about to get a bit confrontational like, the patrons loading up their weapons, Gordon steps in.

“We don’t need a licence” chants Gordon as he waves his hand around the room.

“You don’t need a licence” says The Nasty.

“Why don’t you just leave”

“Yes, why don’t I just leave” and with that the Nasty packs up and scurries out the door.

“Gordon, out hero” cry the crew “drinks all round on Gordon”

Hung comes over to Gordon’s side “Gee, Gordon, that was some show, now what gizmo did you use?”

“Are you saying I’m not honourable Hungsie?”

“No, but none of this farce crap, okay!”

“Shit, it’s called a DOWOP(Drowns Out Waves of Other People) hence people

Do what? No do wop…

walking down the street singing Do Wop dah dah diddy Do Wop are trying to use the technique. Ten bucks in Start Wars at Space Mart, alters mind waves, useful at times anyway it’s 5 O’Clock somewhere in the universe, time for an ale.”