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“Now there are blues that you get from happiness
There are blues you get from pain
There’re blues when you are pining for your team to be shining
Blues that are hard to explain”[1]
“And there are blues you get from cricket
When you hear your top order snick it and they fill up your thoughts with darkest dread
Yes, these blues become a bummer when they wreck half of your summer
And your steel reserves must harden to take the tranny out in the garden
For there are blues you get from hearin’ your team’s chances disappearin’
When your cricket gear’s at home, out in the shed.
But the meanest blues, the meanest blues there be
Are the kind that I got on my mind
The blues the Baggy Greensters give to me.
There are blues you get in snatches when they drop dead sitter catches
And complainin’ to the umpire “He waz out !”
There are blues you get in cricket when the ball misses the wicket and the keeper fakes a half-convincing shout.
There are blues when you find wanting the captaincy of Ponting
Ain’t no point to linger or to blame his busted finger
‘Coz a punter’s just a punter and a Pup is just a pup
With two lost Ashes in a row, the time is surely up
And the Poms are on a millionteen for none
Yes there are blues when their top batters hit everything that matters
And the Poms are on two millionteen for one
But the baddest blues’s my insistence
When the Greens have less resistance
Than the skin on day old custard and the ponces show no mustard
And take a dive before the oldest foe.
Yes, there are blues when you’re in the thicket
And you blame a grassy wicket that didn’t seam to trouble Poms at all
Or there are blues when selector sinners leave out all the spinners
And there’s no-one who can turn a bloody ball.
You could say that it ain’t fair of me and the Poms were just too good
And selection’s such a tricky thing few mortals understood
I’m blue becoz we’ll all have to wait
For the gifted sons of the golden greats
But by that time, I have a hunch, we’ll all be out there takin’ lunch
Through fattish straws – with our toothless mates.
But the bluest thing, the saddest thing – I’ll remember till I die
Was Pup hangin’ on the final Ashes test, prayin’ for a series tie.
[1] From “Blues My Naughty Sweetie Gives to Me” – bent, with apologies

Sorry. Just because I live near a famous cricket field in Bowral doesn’t mean I know much about cricket. I have never been able (nor have tried hard)to understand all the intricacies of the game but have observed through years of news coverage that it involves hitting a little piece of wood which is resting on three sticks by throwing a ball at it. Sometimes this ball is rubbed on white pants by the thrower. On the other side another man with a large piece of wood, called a bat, tries and fends of the ball by hitting it as far as possible. If the ball gets caught, the ball is thrown up in the air again and that’s when sometimes players leap up and clap each others’ hands.
As a cricket layman it does seem a somewhat hilarious game whereby players jump up and clap each others hands. At other times, a rather solemn looking man, often attired with a jacket and wearing a hat, lifts an arm and with extensed hand points at someone while at the same time allowing his head to sink on his chin.
All that outdoor activity seems thoroughly enjoyable and I just wished I could understand it better. However I am now at the stage where, during the newscoverage of cricket, I imagine I am watching a kind of ballet. If I squint hard, it could even be the Tchaikovsky Nutcrackers Suite.
It helps.
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Nice one Mikey, how about when they said the Australian cricket team needed beer they weren’t joking 🙂
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Another strong contender, Emmjay… Let’s see what the judges have to say…
🙂
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gerard :
31 Dec 2010 7:47:40pm
Surely, cricket like any other sport is played for the sheer joy of it and winning comes second.
All that healthy outdoor jumping, clapping and running around is enjoyable, n’est ce pas ?
Who really cares about ash? Let the poms have it. They can sprinkle it on the snow and ice to open their runways.
I live within about 100 metres of the International Cricket Mausoleum of World Fame at Bowral and enjoy walking around the oval with Milo, the incorrigible Jack Russell. I sometimes see white uniformed men jumping and running with bats and balls. They seem to enjoy it immensely. Isn’t that what it should be about?
A happy New Year, and may the summer concert of chirping crickets also be enjoyed by all.
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Toothless mates! Fattish straws! Bummer this! 🙂
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