• The Pig’s Arms
  • About
  • The Dump

Window Dresser's Arms, Pig & Whistle

~ The Home Pub of the Famous Pink Drinks and Trotter's Ale

Window Dresser's Arms, Pig & Whistle

Monthly Archives: March 2011

The Plight of a serial Seducer

15 Tuesday Mar 2011

Posted by gerard oosterman in Gerard Oosterman

≈ 13 Comments

Tags

Barossa Pearl, Don Juan, Irish, seducer, Tooth beer

The plight of a serial Seducer

Some years ago at the time of cheap Fish & Chips and Barossa Pearl and Tooth beer, we knew a man called Shane. He was from Irish background with a penchant for loud singing and whistling… Apart from that there was nothing particularly remarkable about him. There was one aspect of him though that has kept us fascinated and spellbound for many years. He was an amazing character when it came to his adventures with the opposite sex.

He was as ugly as sin and as sinful as dirt. The one thing that outshone him above all was his art of seduction. He was ugly in as far as his facial features and body shape were concerned. Rake skinny, and with lean sharp pock marked facial features with a purple sheen, immediately giving a hint to over-indulgence of the Barossa Pearl!  He did walk with a swagger though and was blessed with a cheerful optimistic nature. That at least was the opinion of many of us totally perplexed by this almost inexhaustible line up of women that he used to date. They were mainly of short but not for long duration. Inevitably he would be going with yet another Susanne, Miriam, Virginia and too many to mention here…

It was at the time when people used to hold parties. Some of those parties had to have a theme. I don’t know the history of theme parties. One of the ‘themes’, doing the rounds at one stage was’ prostitute and priests’ and we were duly invited to travel to one of those held by someone living in Manly. There was a vague connection to Coca Cola, but pardon my lapse of memory, I haven’t the faintest idea of how that drink came connected to the ‘theme’. We were all supposed to dress as either priest or whore. I wasn’t at all surprised Shane was deftly attired in a black habit tied with a white knotted rope. His demeanor would be sublimely modest and yet utterly prurient.

The legendary exploits of Shane would now be open to an excellent opportunity to study. One thing with him, he would rarely have a relationship long and steady enough to get the opportunity to be invited with a partner. He used to be married and have children but, alas, it did not last and not surprisingly. He wasn’t a man given to talk too much about his past, and was more inclined to look to the future and next exploit. Definitely, not marriage material but that did not appear obvious, at least not straight-a-way, least of all to the many women perhaps secretly harboring dressed all in white and a ringed finger, a husband keen on Bunning’s and doing wonders with a laundry!

The question in my mind was always. What is it that so many women find so fascinating with the Shane’s of this world? This priest and prostitute party would offer me a once in a lifetime opportunity in observing this Shane phenomenon at close range.  What was the magic? What power did he have? I decided to keep at close range and take mental notes, observe and study this’ artist’ at work.  I am not getting into the argument of the good or bad of this behavior, nor admit to admiration or announcing rebukes. There are many experts on the Pig’s Arms forum much more qualified to do that.

 While I could see the attraction of good looking successful men with broad shoulders, scrubbing board, ribbed torsos, tanned, sporty and tall, hefty chins or determined noses, Shane did not fall in this category.  While we often used to ponder about him, there were some snippets that women used to offer for his legendary ‘Don Juan’ status. He ‘makes me feel special’ was one that kept re-occurring. One friend told us that at one party he took her wine glass away in exchange for a proper champagne glass, he told, quote” you deserve a champagne glass”, what are you drinking champagne out of a wine glass for?  She was overwhelmed.

At one stage Shane went to a female psychologist to get counseling for this seemingly endless pursuit of girlfriends not leading to anything more permanent. He at least felt there might be a problem. But, you have guessed right. He ended up taking her out as well and she was married!

 Some weeks later, there was a sobbing woman, desperate for Shane, ringing on our phone. Shane had made a plan and promise to take the psychologist and her children on a camping holiday after Christmas. We softened the blow by letting it gently be known that Shane wasn’t always the most reliable in keeping ‘dates.’  He never saw her again. She, however still rang a few times!

Apart from his quirky manner of making some women feel ‘special’ he also was a generous soul. He never had money but managed to convey generosity, sometimes at the expense of the host but mainly on his credit card, in any case, not a miser. Flowers would be delivered, boxed chocolates and perfume gifted, all discretely and with flair. Shane knew the way to hearts; mostly he was successful in winning over his conquests but only for a short time.

At the priest and prostitute party and queuing for my sausage, bread-roll and a wine, I tried finding, ever so discretely, the seducer. It took some time. Had he left? It was when I went to the back verandah that I noticed him crouched over a woman, locked in an embrace worthy of a theme out of a Harold Robbins novel. It was all over in just twenty minutes after arrival. He had already made his conquest. I had missed the vital moment and still clueless of how and why he seemed to have had this magic attraction over so many women. He politely refused my offer of a drive back to Sydney. No thanks, “I’ll be alright”.

 The trick with champagne glass was about as far as it went for details on his method of seduction. Some women mentioned something about his light heartedness. Not being serious. His swaggering walk was questioned and analyzed. The main attraction seemed to be his ways of making women feel ‘special’. We still try and figure it out. It has now faded into a history.  

He worked as a wool broker and dabbled in share trading. He was last seen in Goulburn and rumours have it he now lives in Adelaide. In between he had married, loved but left again, a second marriage on the slate. The psychologist lady has stopped ringing.

 It was a long time ago!

The Man Who is Starting Something

14 Monday Mar 2011

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Lehan Winifred Ramsay

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

Painting, rumination

The Man Who is Starting Something

 

Painting and Story by Lehan Winifred Ramsay

Rumination. It is a word that describes the act of “dwelling on the negative”. So the theory goes, there are many people who spend the large part of their days doing this, and so have a perpetually anxious state. It could even be called dwelling in the negative, because negative thoughts locate one’s entire world in these negative thoughts. The Rumination-sayers tell us that rumination is best allotted a time of thirty minutes of so, in which doom can run freely and unchecked.

The Man Who is Starting Something has come from another country. For one reason or another, in one way or another. Should you ask him about it, his thoughts will go there and stay there. Should he manage to wrest those thoughts away from there there is little sustenance for them in the new world. If beloved things are absent, they are absent. But this rumination is a bad habit, and so it must be fought. He must try to dwell on the positive. He is from another land, so the culture around him sits quietly and lightly, not fighting for his attention as his own would. He has few friends, few family, few ties to distract him. If he conquers his rumination he will find little satisfaction in anything but to be driven.

The Man Who is Starting Something will pick up the complete set of Roblocks and pack them neatly into his consciousness. No cries from the children will bother him if they are not written in the commands of his mechanical functions. If the blocks say eat he will eat, but eating will not become a pursuit of cultural connection. His creative functions will be entirely tied to the pursuit of something he wants to have or do. All else like a second language. In his head when he needs it, far away when he doesn’t. The Man Who is Starting Something is a migrant even if he is not, because he is sustained like all migrant-likes on an understanding of a life that is no longer there.

12.2 The Pigs Arms World Cup Team

14 Monday Mar 2011

Posted by Mark in Mark

≈ 24 Comments

Tags

Ashes, Australia, cricket, Father O'Way, fiction, humor, humour

The Pigs Arms First XI by Warrigal Mirriyuula

Here’s the list of the World Cup Pigs Arms Eleven or so……by Hung One On

At the  rear: Hung One On with unravelling brain, Lehan Winifred Ramsay listening for clues, Atomou gaze firmly fixed to the job at hand, Hadron keeping an eye on each way.

Middle row: Merv, Commander Al Foyle in full uniform, Astyages caped and ready for the next journey, Vectis Lad the old fox, Lord Algernon the ICCB representative, Sandshoe as the capped bear, Bishop Bishop wearing his favourite number 3 T-shirt instead of his lucky Pigs Arms T-shirt [hint hint], Helvi with gun in hand.

Front row: GO the artist droid(just), Warrigal the chief sensor who unfortunately couldn’t bring his head as in was in for maintenance, Michael Jones the publican of the Bats Droppings with a spare skull, Big M with battle axe at hand, Throwdough Haggins , Vivienne with Catherine the central controlling computer in her lap, Voice and Neville the navcom illustrating a star, just in case you didn’t know.

Little did they realise but they had to play a game of cricket against the droids at the local village green.

The Pigs Arms won the toss and batted. Here is the scorecard 50 overs per side.

The Pigs Arms XI

Atomou,  bowled Cassandra for 69

GO the artist droid,  Caught Van Gough bowled Lawrence Hargraves for 78

Hung On One retired hurt for 0

Michael Jones,  Caught Sleeping bowled Over for 10

Vivienne, not out 110 and still raging

Helvi, bowled By  Boredom 1

Neville, caught by Bourbon bowled With Coke 30

Big M, not out 55 however several members of the opposing team are nursing wounds

Lehan caught Holding On Bowled by Tsunamis for 50

Astyages bowled by Harpagus for 15

Vectis Lad, run out by a short half nose photo finish for 25

443 off 50 overs. Droid team declared 0/0 as the bar was opened conveniently by Michael Jones.

Libiam ne’lieti calici

13 Sunday Mar 2011

Posted by gerard oosterman in Gerard Oosterman

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

Fledermaus, opera, Verdi

Libiam ne’lieti calici

 

Over 900 people traipsed within an hour or so through the bush, all in single file. Some held hands, others held bundles of fold-up chairs or were jointly carrying eskies. They did this walk through native bush but followed a track. Here and there, there were areas roped off with a sign”re-generation taking place”. It seemed they all needed to arrive deep inside this bush-land at a certain time. The chairs and eskies indicated a stay of some length and the holding of hands had more to do with old age rather than romance. Indeed, some had hand-held guidance aided by a walking stick in the other hand as well.

The variety of fold-up chairs, eskies and shade hats, and umbrellas, plastic sheeting and large wine bags either indicated some sort of senior cult preparing for  mystery bush dance  meeting or a large communal  final love-in. None looked as if sex was in the offering, nor likely as if they could break into a wild forest dance. It all looked rather sober and somewhat sedated. No shrieking or renting of the peaceful bush by coarse oaths.

Opera in the Arboertum

 

None smoked, none were disorderly, and they just plodded on. They finally arrived at some clearance and it became clear what this was all about. People were checked for tickets and some that were without, put down the money and bought, not just tickets, also programs. The clearance in the bush, being somewhat remote had a sign Arboretum. They all seemed to know what to do and spread sheets, unfolded their chairs and put down wine bags and opened eskies. Some of the very old were gently lowered into some more comfortable camping chairs with arm rests and for extra softness, pillows.

 I noticed on the left a number of blue coloured plastic constructions with “Loo-mobile” and large phone numbers displayed on the doors. There was already a small queue being formed. Most in the queue looked towards the sky or talked somewhat hushed as if the real purpose of it all had nothing to do with urgency of bowels and/ or bladders after a long and strenuous walk.

Right smack in the middle on some pallets was a grand piano. Has anyone ever seen a piano in the bush? Well, we did and not just a piano. Many people dressed in black but mainly young,  arrived with a large variety of musical instruments. I also noticed a number of very sophisticated loud speakers on tri-pods in between the trees and a kind of machine with many sliding up- and down levers that I used to see at recording sessions, when for a short time I worked for a Swedish advertising agency, a hundred years ago.

Well, this was clearly a setting for an opera. Some women and men were clearing throats and voicing loud sounds, violin strings were tensioned, bows tightened and a short man with an apron was tuning the grand Steinway.

We had arrived at our destination of an opera at the Pearl Beach Arboretum. This was an extraordinary setting for a great afternoon. Music and champagne flowing and kookaburras listening.

 What a week-end.

Swine Lake – the Prelude

12 Saturday Mar 2011

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Emmjay

≈ 22 Comments

Tags

Swine Lake

Manne Becomes More Cheerful

 

Manne's Tatyana

Greetings! I liked your profile. I’m just going to send you my pic.

I have many interests. I am cheerful, pleasant, cheerful and sincere girl.

I’m sure we can find common cheerful interests. I like sports, sea, beach.

I am from Rus, I am twenty seven years old.

I guess I’m the only girl who still believes in fairy tales and waits for the prince on a white horse.

I have my job and many friends.

But there is only loneliness in my heart is still with the lack of fine feeling.

I want to get acquainted with you to have a pen pal and to rely on the possible relationship in real life. I’ll have to believe and hope that you will write me back to my personal e-mail: kadyrochka@moscowmail.com I hope that my message remained noticed you and you appreciate my pictures. I only hope to become your friend. I’ll wait for your letter and pictures with great hope for further communication.

Take care of yourself sincrely Tatyana.

—ooo—

It had been a rollercoaster year for Manne.  With the death of the pub cockatoo, a failed e-romance and an unsuccessful stint as Neville Cole’s key grip, things needed to look up or Manne’s face would slide off the front of his head into a puddle on the bar.

Manne’s woes had not gone unnoticed. But he was not entirely alone.  Foodge, had (putting it politely) not been overwhelmed by work since the pre-Christmas infidelity rush – his traditional stocking-filler and he’d used his time since then in quiet contemplation in the front bar, breaking in the new fedora that ‘Shoe had found abandoned at the First Dog on the Moon book launch.  The lid gave Foodge an air of sleuthful indolence, although Merv observed that “slothful” indolence better characterised Foodge’s growing bar tab.

Something had to be done to break the impasse.

Foodge sidled up to the bar at a comfortably “not-too-intimate-but amiable” distance from Manne and ordered “a Pink for me, a pink for my man Manne here and have one for yourself” – gesturing vaguely towards Merv.

It was becoming a stretch of Merv’s tolerance and he was scouting around for some kind of mind-broadening and life changing experience for Manne.  Merv needed Manne to remove his little grey cloud of glum from the pub.  He was putting off the other patrons – nobody had heard or seen VoR for weeks.  Gregor had reportedly taken a job as a gag writer for Watchtower and mumbled something about Manne and dis-inspiration just before he dis-appeared.

The phone calls to Lord Bunter had not been returned and there was a shortage of thistles at Gez and Helvi’s new abode.

The last straw for Manne was the non-appearance of Tatyana – the last of a long string of Russian girls who had shown a considerable e-interest in Manne, or possibly in the cash Manne earnt from casual bar-useful work in the pub.  He had, at her behest, transferred the price of an Aeropflogge ticket into a Moscow bank account on the promise of her speedy trip to meet “the man of her dreams”.  It was probably on the strength of the photograph Manne had sent her – as Foodge noted “taken from Manne’s good side on a good day, running downhill with a tailwind”.  So it was with a particularly long face that Manne returned from the anticipated airport rendezvous alone with the new-found knowledge that there was no airline called “Aeropflogge”.

Merv served the two pinks and marked up another entry in Foodge’s conga line bar tab when the door of the front bar flew open and a gentleman of indeterminant (and possibly indifferent) height clad in an outfit that fairly shouted “I’m on Holidays”, stormed the pub.

His needs were immediately apparent.  He made them so.

“Ouzo !”

Merv extracted the cork from a bizarre-looking bottle in the shape of a still.  The label read ‘Pitsiladi’ which looked Greek to Merv.  He poured the new chum a shot – much to the delight of the visitor.  “AHA ! “ he said. “From the island of Lesvos. Some of my best friends are Lesvians”.

“Ouzo for all !  And a plate of olives.  And some dolmades.  And how’s the kitchen for souvlakia ?”  Merv looked doubtful.  “I reckon granny could whip up some wedges and tzatziki”.

“Excellent !  Praise be to Dionysis”.

“Another ouzo…… er ….” Said Merv.

“But of course !  My name is Atomou, but my friends call me ‘Mou’ for short”

“I was going to avoid calling attention to your height, ‘Mou” said Merv.

The bon-vivant index of the pub was rising steadily with the exception of a small grey cloud sitting next to Foodge at the bar.

“What’s with the long face young man” inquired ‘Mou.

“Arr this Russian shiela stood him up, mate” Foodge cut in – his usual helpful self.

“There’s only one thing for it” said ‘Mou.  “It’s time that you went on an Odyssey”.

“I’ve been in Emmjay’s Zephyr” responded Manne.

“No, I mean it’s time for you to travel far, conquer your fears, slay your wild beasts and make your rite of passage and become a hero amongst the patrons of the Pig’s Arms.”

Manne looked just like someone contemplating a sickie.

“Now listen, it is said that the Goddess Demeter was wont to go and swim amongst the pigs.  The legend has it that she was fond of surfing the point break at Wherethefarkarwee” near Swine Lake and that she was wooed and bedded there by Captain Goodvibes who had taken the form of the mythic surfing pig.  Goodvibes it is said was fatally attractive to women, possibly because he had a limitless supply of scoobs, cans of VB and a board in the shape of a hammerhead shark”.  No wait, it might have been a head in the shape of a bored hammer.  No wait, it might have actually BEEN a hammerhead shark”.

A flash went through Merv’s head.  It was an opportunity to kill two birds with one stone.

“That’s it, our sage ‘Mou.  An odyssey.  We will send Manne and Foodge on an odyssey – to surf the point break at Wherethefarkarewee near the Swine Lake.

“There will be monsters”, said ‘Mou.

Merv reached under the bar and placed before Manne his trusty Purdey under and over shotgun.

Merv filled the shot glasses and broke open another Lesvian spirit.

“A toast to Manne’s Swine Lake Odyssey” !

“Yasas!” hooted ‘Mou.

Granny brought the wedges and as the pub regulars began to file in, the feast began…….

Fairbridge Boys

12 Saturday Mar 2011

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Warrigal Mirriyuula

≈ 20 Comments

Tags

child migration, Fairbridge Boys, Gateshead, Tyneside

Fremantle Harbour Entrance

 

By Warrigal Mirriyuula

Benjamin and Edward were brothers. They were the identical twin sons of Maeve O’Sullivan and Daniel Fitzpatrick.  This is their story.

The twins were an unexpected and somewhat difficult blessing that cold December morning when Maeve went into early labour in the tiny workers cottage where the family lived in Gateshead. At first, given their prematurity, the twins were not expected to live.

It was a mercifully brief labour. The midwife, looking upon them after she’d cleaned, swaddled and laid them, one on each side of Maeve, thought of the sadness that would come in train of this cold windy beginning with the slates on the roof rattling out their tattoo of stony cold welcome. These plucky little boys would be lucky to see the week out. She took Maeve’s limp exhausted hand in hers, put on her best, most brave smile and said, “Two strong sons to look after you and Danny. You’ve done so well for one so young and your first time too”.

Nodding vigourously to confirm the truth of this statement, she turned away and busied herself tidying up the room. She stoked the little fire in the iron grate and added another lump of coal. By the time she turned her attention back to Maeve the young mother was asleep and the baby boys, faces red and still showing the creases and folds of the newly arrived, fisted little hands and their eyes screwed shut, made the best they could of their first day on earth.

Maeve did washing for the posh, and a little needlework when she could get it. A native of Skibbereen, Maeve’s family had come to Newcastle in search of work for her da. He’d got a job at a nearby pit

Maeve met Danny on a works outing when she still had a job in the bottle washing plant at the Newcastle Breweries. She had been sixteen when they met. Danny, an orphan from Belfast, was nineteen and worked on the docks and in the warehouses along The Tyne, taking what work was offered and drinking most of his pay. Indeed he’d been drunk the day Maeve first set eyes on him.

Still clutching his bottle of Brown Ale, he was throwing up and admonishing himself all at the same time. Maeve didn’t know what to make of this untidy apparition as she looked down between the refreshment tents. There he was, barely upright, amongst the crates and strewn empties, the ropes and pegs, half full bottle swinging loosely at the end of his arm while his other hand tried valiantly to keep his glossy black, curly fringe out of harm’s way. Between goips he smiled so sweetly at Maeve, like an angel; and so honestly, without a hint of self-consciousness in his bright green eyes.

“Musta got a dirty bottle.” he slurred in a tone that fully confirmed that his current situation was in no way his fault. Indeed it wasn’t the drink at all, or even the surfeit of it, but a dirty bottle, no question.

Maeve let go a spontaneous laugh before her face assumed a more utilitarian look of mock outrage.

“I wash them bottles!” she said with just a little more self-importance than she intended; or was due so ordinary a job. Danny shrugged, smiled sweetly again, then turned and spat into the grass. He straightened himself to face Maeve, his black curls in his eyes.

The men in Maeve’s family were always drinking so the sight of this good-looking young man drunk in the middle of the afternoon was nothing new or extraordinary. It was a brewery picnic after all.

“Here, gimme a look at ya” she said bossily as she stepped over the guy ropes to join him between the tents. “Let’s get this mess off ya.”

Maeve helped Danny right himself and wiped his mouth and face with a little spit on her favourite cotton handkerchief. The one she’d embroidered so carefully with the little swallows and blue birds. She’d wash it out when she got home. She folded the messy stink into the hankie and tucked it back under her cuff.

Danny, unused to such tender ministration, simply dragged his coat sleeve across his mouth and inspecting it blearily, seemed somewhat perplexed to find no evidence of his late indisposition on the coarse wool. Maeve felt then that she would like this drunken young angel; and Danny, looking at her really for the first time, believed he might have discovered something more intoxicating than drink.

The rest of that summer they spent as much time together as their work and Maeve’s parents would allow. Friends said of them that they were made for each other. Danny’s thirst for the drink seemed to abate. He believed he’d found a good hearted country girl who accepted him for what he was, and Maeve’s friends wondered how long it would be before Danny put the whole thing on a more matrimonial footing.

That would have to wait however.

In September, as the leaves were turning and falling, Danny got a berth as a general hand in a steamer on the Australia run. Maeve’s mammy and da thought just as well. She was only sixteen and Danny wasn’t exactly the match they’d hoped for. He was a good enough young man and he doted on their Maeve, but he drank too much and at such a young age. Perhaps the hard work and discipline at sea would knock some responsibility into him. They hoped for the best for their only daughter.

Danny had first laid out his plans for Maeve and himself one evening as they shared a late cup of tea in a café.

As a treat in the midst of their austerity they’d been to see the new talkie “Blackmail”, at the refurbished Stoll cinema on Westgate Road. Before they went in it was obvious that Danny had something on his mind and to make things worse, during the film Maeve just couldn’t feel at ease. She was distracted by the sound of Anny Ondra’s voice. It just didn’t fit. Sometimes Maeve thought it was someone else’s voice altogether. Besides, people didn’t really behave like this. Well, no-one she knew.

Danny didn’t seem to notice it though. He’d sat, wide eyed, transfixed by the new wonder of sound. Maeve loved his boyish enthusiasms and remembered fondly the day they’d walked some miles along the Durham Road looking for a likely hilltop from which to fly a kite they’d made. It was put together from salvaged brown paper and some willow sticks Danny had dried and then shaped with his penknife. Maeve had made the flutters for the tail from scraps of silk in her sewing box. It had been their first family project, of sorts, and during the making of the kite Danny had shown his serious side. As the chief designer and engineer of the kite he’d directed Maeve in a rather stern manner. His own commitment shown by the appearance of the tip of his tongue, slipping out between his lips on the right side of his mouth as he applied the glue to the brown paper and folded it over the springy willow frame. His reserve when they met outside the cinema, put aside as they sat through “Blackmail”, indicated that whatever it was that was on his mind, it had to be at least as important as the kite.

Oh, but it had been great fun that afternoon. Just a couple of kids in the wind blowing over the rounded hilltop, catching the kite and drawing it high up into the blue arc of the sky filled with fluffy white clouds. Maeve imagined herself and Danny riding the kite through the fat clouds, a sort of cumulo-nimbic inspection with Danny as the exuberant comptroller and she as his avid assistant. It was a glorious afternoon.

As she sat in the darkened cinema watching Danny’s rapt attention to the screen she found her apprehension regarding whatever it was that had been distracting him earlier had completely passed away. She squeezed his hand in the dark and he didn’t seem to notice, so completely was he captivated by the screen. Whatever was on his mind, he’d tell her later.

Danny’s plan, as laid out between excited slurps on his tea and interrupted with flashes retelling the film, was to work as hard as he could, spend as little as was possible and put together a nest egg. Maeve would do the same. When they had put enough aside they would get a little house and their life together would begin. The only thing that seemed to be lacking as Maeve’s mind went off into other clouds of puffy possibility, was an actual proposal of marriage. Danny had managed to describe their current understanding and feelings for one another quite well, if a little dispassionately. Maeve had put this down to his wanting to be serious about his life changing plans for them both. He had then recommenced the narrative of his plan at some point after the wedding when they were already set up in their own little house, perhaps assuming that these details would somehow take care of themselves in the living of it. It certainly didn’t seem important to the telling. Maeve had thought this to be just like a man. The ceremony, the satin and lace would be entirely Maeve’s concern.

That was their plan as Maeve farewelled Danny on Tyneside with the wind and the cold October rain flying in sideways off the North Sea. The miserable cold of their parting did nothing to damp the warm glow Maeve had begun to feel about her life and her future with Danny. More sure of herself than at any time since leaving Cork with her family, she saw her future as assured; Danny had almost given up the drink and he would become a hard worker who might turn his personable nature into advancement for himself. Maeve for her part would bear them many healthy children and keep a happy, tidy house with a welcome for all at the door.

That was how she saw it and was working towards that future when Danny’s first letter arrived postmarked Aden. He wrote of how he missed her and of the hard work on board and how his foreman drove him and the other first timers to exhaustion. He wrote of the voyage across the Mediterranean and down the Suez Canal. He said he wanted to describe everything for her and how exotic so much of it was for a young man out in the wide world for the first time.

The words, scrawled in his spidery ill tutored hand, written lying on his bunk with a borrowed fountain pen, filled her heart and she saw, in the dreamscapes she built with Danny’s detailed descriptions, the flying fish leaping across the sparkling blue Mediterranean while the seabirds followed the ship; she saw the colourful ports and the strange people. These sun drenched visions kept her warm as the bitter northern winter set in.

Maeve took to wearing Danny’s rough woollen coat around the house. The one he’d been wearing the day they’d met. She told herself that she could feel, as if from inside it all, the strong contours of the muscles of his back and shoulders. She could smell him in the coat. She shivered a little in excitement and anticipation. Each night as she sat by the small fire doing her needlework in the parlour, too grand a name for this pokey little front room, she would dream of Danny, casting him as a swashbuckling pirate or brave naval hero. All of these dreams ended with Danny running up the quay, tossing his seabag aside, grasping her about the waist and throwing her up into the air; then, slowly, gently, allowing her to slide down the facing of his donkey jacket until their lips met and the reunion exploded into a passionate embrace ending with a long kiss as they both, entwined, turned slowly on the slick cobbles of the quayside.

Late one evening she became so distracted by her reverie that she pricked her finger with the needle and looking, discovered that she’d made a hash of the work and would have to unpick the lot and do it all over. She threw a few pieces of coal in the little grate and began again. A small inconvenience when balanced against her vision of their future.

Danny’s next letter arrived postmarked Goa. Danny said that the crossing of the Indian Ocean had been stinking; hot hard work during the days and sweltering sleepless nights with no breeze. Below decks tempers flared and apparently the Chinese cook had taken it into his head to murder one of the stokers with a meat cleaver. Maeve was shocked and worried for Danny.

“All Chinamen are mad.” Danny had written, as if that explained the whole thing, but that wasn’t the end of the story.

Danny had intervened as the stoker ran down one of the companionways with the cook close behind. Danny tripped the cook who went sprawling at the bottom of the steps, dropping the cleaver. There’d been a scuffle for the intended murder weapon and Danny’s hand got a grip first, but his grip didn’t quite close and the cleaver slid through a scupper, tumbling down the side of the ship before sploshing into the sea. The stoker disappeared round a corner while Danny got up and wiped himself off. The cook, thwarted in his murderous ambitions, spat vehemently over the side and fixed Danny with an inscrutable oriental eye; apparently he only had the one, before turning and walking off down the deck muttering violent curses only he and his malevolent gods would understand.

The mate had fined Danny 10/6 for the loss of the company’s cleaver and cancelled Danny’s next shore leave. Apparently the cook was mad, but he was a great cook and the First Mate, looking to cool the whole thing down, decided that on this occasion he’d adjudicate the matter as black and white letter of the law. It was Danny’s hand last on the cleaver, it was Danny tripped the cook. The stoker wasn’t called and nobody wanted to deal with the mad Chinaman.

Danny had thought this grossly unfair and told Maeve so in terms that carried the salty smell of the sea right off the paper.

With his next letter from Singapore his mood had blackened. There were no fanciful descriptions of the foreign and bizarre, no tales of sunlit seas and far blue horizons. Just a withering tirade against the mate and his foreman, who Danny wrote “treats me like a slave; and he’s always pushing and kicking the new hands. He’s a ironclad bastard, if you’ll excuse my French!”

She got only a postcard from Fremantle but Danny promised a long letter from Adelaide. It didn’t come.

By the time Danny’s letter from Sydney arrived Maeve had some bad news of her own for Danny. The financial collapse soon after Danny’s departure to sea had seen Newcastle Breweries sack many of its workers; “last on, first off” had seen Maeve lose her job. Her two elder brothers had been laid off too and the family was struggling on only Da’s wage and the little bit Maeve and Mammy brought in from needlework. The brothers were out every day, trudging up and down the waterfront and the warehouses along the Tyne trying to pick up work. As demand for coal dropped, so too the pits began to put men off and Maeve’s Da hoped he could hang on to his job but it seemed the whole town was now unemployed.

Maeve so needed to talk with Danny. She badly needed his old optimism but she had no idea how to contact him other than through the shipping office down on Tyneside. It was only a mile from her home in Gateshead down to the docks so she walked. When she got there one of the shipping clerks told her that apart from radio telegraphy, which she simply couldn’t afford, there was no way she could contact Danny until he would be almost home, and that might be another three or four months depending on cargo and whether they came back via the Cape or Suez or went across the Pacific and through the Panama Canal. The clerk, seeing her distress, took pity on Maeve and offered, “If you come back in a few days we’ll know which way the ship’s going and you might be able to send a letter “Post Restante” to a port along the way, but the seaman would need to know and pick it up. Do you think he’d do that?” It was the best he could do. Maeve was disconsolate. She thanked the clerk adding, “It’s silly, I’m silly! We didn’t make a way for me to write to him.”

She thanked the clerk again and began the walk home, her eyes filling with slow tears. Suddenly she felt as if the bright future she and Danny had planned was in dire peril. With her out of work she couldn’t continue to put that little by each week. Indeed all her savings were going on keeping her own family ahead of the landlord and the sheriff. Uncertainty began to dog her every thought. She abraded herself for not thinking that, of course, she’d want to write to Danny. “That’s what comes of too much daydreaming.” she thought, as a coolness crept into her and she began to doubt herself, Danny, and the future.

Building Block Monster

11 Friday Mar 2011

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Lehan Winifred Ramsay

≈ 13 Comments

Tags

Monster blocks

Building Block Monster

Painting and Story by Lehan Winifred Ramsay

Small autonomous monster blocks will move in the same direction until a small pebble on the ground, a twig, a rough patch, sets them off course. For a long time they will appear to be in formation. Eventually they will veer wildly. The ant sits for what feels like a long, long time, watching them, occasionally nudging one or the other until it moves back into it’s path. But the small monster blocks are reliable only at accomplishing their small tasks. Working together is beyond them, and after consultation with the Ant Elders, the ant has formed a new plan. The small monster blocks will have to nudge and nestle themselves up and over each other block until they form one block. The Building Block Monster. Not yet a social being, but an automated device capable of more complex behaviour.  Capable of social behaviour and limited problem solving. Each block able to mimic the commands of the ant, one block correcting other blocks. One central control containing hierarchical ordering. The Building Block Monster is a RoBlock.

Chess instead of sport

11 Friday Mar 2011

Posted by gerard oosterman in Gerard Oosterman

≈ 11 Comments

Tags

chess, football, girlfriends, sport, thugs

.

It used to be that chucking out the sport-pages together with real-estate sections of the newspapers one would avoid the most tedious part of news. Even that little treat is now being denied. Sport is front page news and no sport seems more newsworthy than the latest punch-up. How sport and punch-ups, including glassing girlfriends, running/manufacturing/ taking drugs, drink driving etc ever became mixed-up so often with sport and mainstream news is not precisely known.

But, what is known, that for decades now while watching TV during news broadcast, especially on the Commercial channels, one would get treated to lengthy footage of sport-people in suits leaving a special Court. This was often followed by sections of film where some kind of brawl or small riot had occurred while playing sport.  The odd thing was that going to Court did not do much. Day after day, the same footage and often the same sportspeople would be strolling out of court. They were mainly rather brawny and muscular looking men with enormous chins given to big scowling smirks and also, going by their monosyllabic answers to journalist questions, not appearing to be the sharpest tools in the shed. ..Or if not appearing alert, they perhaps not had the benefit of a good English teacher some years before. Was education with so much emphasis on the ‘winning’ of sport already then grooming future young people into becoming first winners, then punch throwers and boozers?

 In any case, those endless repeat footages of those players leaving Court was not unlike cheap cow boy movies showing the same chase going past the same set of rocks over and over again. And so it was allowed to continue. In fact, I suspect, the whole idea of sport discipline was clearly seen as a charade, good TV footage, and perhaps even accepted as being part of sport. Sport became the ‘punch-up’.  If it involved a Court appearance, it just spiced it all up. Almost like a good free advertisement.

With the latest batch of brawls and punch-ups, the inevitable event is then often ascribed to having been ’fuelled’ by alcohol. It is again seen as something as part and parcel of sport. By the way, it is not always just a punch-up or  glassing that is fuelled by drink, no, some driving offences by sportspeople are also involving alcohol. You definitely get the impression that sport and alcohol does add up to bad behavior including violence, driving offences and a Court appearances. Overall though, we still seem to continue making exceptions for it. If it is sport and especially if they are well known sport people, anything in sport is possible and seemingly allowed.

Anyway, of late one could be forgiven for wishing and hoping that all those sports be banned, including the’ best of the players’, because even the ‘best’ are now seen to have caught the’ punch-up’ bug.  The violent outbursts, punching in public and ‘fuelled’ by alcohol are often done at the crack of dawn. That seems to be another mystery, what are they doing at that time? Are they not on a strict kind of routine, keeping good hours, good diets, drinking butter milk eating rye bread, and eating fresh fruit?

If sport ought to equal good robust health, fitness and agility, and something for our youngsters to aspire to, then that kind of brawling sport has hopelessly lost its way. There is no way that parents can be expected to continue to accept the present sport, especially those games with the oblong ball, as being   positive and healthy  for our young and vulnerable.  

Even, the way sport has been allowed to dominate our schools ought to be questioned.  The introduction of so much competitive sport seems to encourage and fuel ‘winning’ much more than just enjoyment and fitness. In any case it hasn’t led to fitness with our obesity amongst the young getting worse. Winning at all costs might well be why so many become to accept that violence is one way of winning. If you can knock over your opponent, you are closer to a win.  Once on this slippery road, a few years later and with alcohol now firmly entrenched, voila, another future football thug is on its way.

The way out would be to make physical fitness important and ease off on this manic obsession with competitive sport. Schools are where the young are supposed to grow into caring considerate people and not into ‘winners and losers’, whereby sporting achievements are often judged way above their true worth or value. Sport in Australia might have to be looked at and perhaps seen as somewhat overrated.

I would much rather have my kids be good chess players and be fit, healthy, considered and caring above all, than turn into some sport hero who can only express himself/ herself off and on field, by assaulting, taking drugs , and booze ups.  I have yet to hear of a chess player being in Court on punch-up charges or drink driving. Let’s hope that with the recent exposure of so much sport being brought into disrepute that those experts in education will lift their game and put gymnasiums for fitness and chess competition for brains into all schools and put competitive sport on the backburner.

The revolution has begun

09 Wednesday Mar 2011

Posted by gerard oosterman in Gerard Oosterman

≈ 5 Comments

Something to ponder about.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvoRat-Tl_Q&feature=player_embedded

Pig’s Psalm 12 – the Director of Music

09 Wednesday Mar 2011

Posted by Therese Trouserzoff in Emmjay, Pig Psalms

≈ 29 Comments

Tags

humour, Pig's Psalm

It is to you, our Waz,  whizz of musicological magic

That we look for inspiration

And a howling reminder of the great tunefulness of the youtube-o-sphere

Thy range is inexhaustible.

Thy tastes hyper-eclectic, tinged with soppiness

But

Counterbalanced with edgy Zappa-like overtones.

And a tendency to lope off into the sunset with a jaunty, sandy-furred carefree gait.

Blessed be you, our Waz for the music is in you and you are in the music.

Amen (Chorus)

← Older posts
Newer posts →

Patrons Posts

  • The Question-Crafting Compass November 15, 2025
  • The Dreaming Machine November 10, 2025
  • Reflections on Intelligence — Human and Artificial October 26, 2025
  • Ikigai III May 17, 2025
  • Ikugai May 9, 2025
  • Coalition to Rebate All the Daylight Saved April 1, 2025
  • Out of the Mouths of Superheroes March 15, 2025
  • Post COVID Cooking February 7, 2025
  • What’s Goin’ On ? January 21, 2025

We've been hit...

  • 769,058 times

Blogroll

  • atomou the Greek philosopher and the ancient Greek stage
  • Crikey
  • Gerard & Helvi Oosterman
  • Hello World Walk along with Me
  • Hungs World
  • Lehan Winifred Ramsay
  • Neville Cole
  • Politics 101
  • Sandshoe
  • the political sword

We've been hit...

  • 769,058 times

Patrons Posts

  • The Question-Crafting Compass November 15, 2025
  • The Dreaming Machine November 10, 2025
  • Reflections on Intelligence — Human and Artificial October 26, 2025
  • Ikigai III May 17, 2025
  • Ikugai May 9, 2025
  • Coalition to Rebate All the Daylight Saved April 1, 2025
  • Out of the Mouths of Superheroes March 15, 2025
  • Post COVID Cooking February 7, 2025
  • What’s Goin’ On ? January 21, 2025

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 374 other subscribers

Rooms athe Pigs Arms

The Old Stuff

  • RSS - Posts
  • RSS - Comments

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 374 other subscribers

Archives

Website Powered by WordPress.com.

  • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Window Dresser's Arms, Pig & Whistle
    • Join 280 other subscribers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Window Dresser's Arms, Pig & Whistle
    • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...