Chief Editorovski DPravda Central Commissariate

In late breaking news today, following the surprise defenestration of the entire South Moscow Genetics Laboratory from its own 9th storey window, DPravda reported today apparent errors in the DNA analysis of the bucket of survivor remnants form the infamous Wagnerev jet crash.

Former Lab chief, Joe Zefstalinski said that it was correct that the remains contained DNA from ten individuals and that these had been cross-matched with individuals NOT on the jet’s catering list.

Positive identification has been made and that the actual passengers included:

  • N Kruschev
  • Czarina K Romanoff
  • Cosmonaut Leika
  • The Sisters Karamazova
  • An unnamed curtain raiser for the Bolshevik Ballet, and
  • Elvis Presleyovski