Story by Emmjay

In late barking news today, the Pig’s Arms cub reporter Manne O’Manne reports this report:

Australia has a new PM !

After months of speculation and rumours, Tony Abbott finally admitted that he and Country Joe and the Fish had no effing clue about how to run the country.

Abbott is reported to have said ” I give up Leigh.  You talk to lots of people.  You’re a pretty smart chicky babe.  What should we do to run this country ?”

Quick as a whip, Leigh hit him with another penetrating question ” Have you ever swum at Portsea , Tone ?”

“No”, replied Tone.

“How about I mind the shop while you iron man a couple of laps ?”

“Can Jumping’ Joe come too ?”, said Tone.

“Sure”, said Leigh. “Tell him to watch out for Japanese harpoons”.

“OK, deal !” said Tone, pulled on his goggles and snorkel and headed off for his big salty adventure.

“Right”, said Leigh. “Get me Credlin.  Credlin ? Yes. Yes. No. What part of ‘fuck right off’ don’t you understand ?”

“Now get me Matthias Kormann.  Matty, boy ? No, it’s about the ABC.  That’s right, I said TRIPLE the ABC budget, and while you’re at it, send ten bucks to the CSIRO – we need more of that sciency stuff”.

“Uhlmann ?  No, I definitely think we need to strengthen the ABC office in Baghdad.  Of course ! You the man, Uhlmann.  Why wait until tomorrow ?  Right.  Right.  Bye “

aside to camera:  “Piece of cake.”