Category Archives: The Dining Room

Biltong – sort of !

31 Sunday Dec 2017

Posted by in The Dining Room, Vivienne

≈ 5 Comments

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Vivienne patiently waits for her biltong

 

Recipe from our Chef du Jour Vivienne

Make this on the day you want to eat it.  Great as a pre-dinner/bbq/party nibble.

One whole skirt steak (which makes the quantity shown on the tray ready for the oven).

Usually too long, so cut in half and then cut into strips starting from what was the side – that is, you cut with the grain, not across it.  Where meat is thicker, tip strip on to side and cut in half again.

Cutting Biltong

In a glass bowl mix:

  • biltong mixing2 teaspoons of ground ginger
  • 2 minced cloves of garlic (I’ve use fresh and the jar stuff, either are fine)
  • Half a cup of brown sugar (not the dark stuff)
  • 1 tablespoon ground coriander
  • 1 tablespoon garam masala
  • 1 tablespoon of fish sauce  (although I think I used more like a dessert spoon)
  • 3 tablespoons of kepjac manis
  • 3 tablespoons of regular soy
  • Salt – about 1 level teaspoon
  • Some pepper

Add the meat and ensure well coated.

Marinate for minimum of 1 hour but no more than 1 and a half hours – no need to put in fridge as is best at room temperature in your house.

Place on racks on a tray.  Close together.

biltong tray

Preheat oven to 140c and cook at least 1 and a half hours (up to no more than 2 hrs) – this depends on your oven (they do vary).  My oven is not fan forced.

Biltong Eat

Cool a little.  Eat

 

 

 

Hung’s Wide World of Pizza

01 Friday Jul 2016

Posted by in Mark, The Dining Room

≈ 24 Comments

Tuna

Tuna

 

nurse02

A nice pear

Hi, Hung here. Thought I would share with you one of my all time favorite pizza toppings. It’s tuna and pear, now no emesis will be entered into on this site however this is an original way that Italians would make pizza.

Okay we will get to the tin tacks in a minute however you need six beers and a shotgun and a cat.

[Cut, cut, stop here. Emmjay here, look Hung what do you have against cats for Gordon’s sake?

Nothing boss, just that they are good at intercepting bullets]

Okay, no fun then I guess so here’s the ingredients.

One pizza dough, rolled out onto a tray for baking in the oven. I know that most of you will all have your own method of making a pizza dough but this is my simple method for one pizza.

170 ml water

1 tbsp olive oil

half tsp salt

1 tsp sugar

1 and 3/4 cups of plain flour

1 tsp yeast

Now I use the dough cycle on my bread machine however if you want to do this by hand, whisk the water sugar and yeast in a bowl and stand for 5 minutes. Chuck in everything else and blend, then on to a floured surface and belt the fuck out of it for ten minutes. Let the dough rest till doubles or about 30 minutes which is enough time to shoot some cats.

Roll the dough out to suit your baking tray. I do this on baking paper. Prick the fuck out of it with a fork.

Okay now for the sauce which you can prepare in between shooting cats or torching your neighbors fence. It’s up to you.

Get a fry pan, add olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic for 2 minutes on medium. Add onion and continue. Add tomatoes, tomato paste, wine, oregano and basil and simmer gently. Add tinned tuna. Let cool.

Shoot a cat, drink more beers, call your neighbor and Islamophobic homosexual. In most cases you will be right. If the cops come deny any knowledge of anything. After the cops leave pierce the tyres of your neighbors car and then shoot their cat.

Spread the tuna sauce on the pizza base. Now add segmented pear around the pizza and top with cheese. The pear should be soft and ready to eat.

Cook in a hot oven for 15 minutes or so. This gives you time to kill more cats and drink more beers.

Enjoy. The pear becomes sweet like pineapple and the tuna provides salt. When Tutu first made this for me I thought she was crazy however it became one of my favorite pizzas. We got this recipe from an Italian cookbook that was printed in the 1950’s.

A pizza

A pizza, well sort of…

 

 

 

Hung’s Wide World of Fritters

28 Monday Mar 2016

Posted by in Mark, The Dining Room

≈ 18 Comments

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zucchini-corn-fritters-11649_l

Pic from taste.com.au

 

Story by Hung

Now, just for a change from all that sex and innuendo with Foodge and that amusing, mildly whimsical Father O’Way here is one of my favorite recipes that’s really hard but easy. The only hard part is the ingredients and the easy part is being home to add them together to make a nice simple meal of corn fritters that can have thousands of variations.

Ingredients – this is what you need to start(shotgun optional, well not really, just read on, lie back and think of England)

Olive oil – about a tablespoon or so

Eggs – times three, beaten. Please wait till kiddies are out of sight due to domestic violence being banned here at the Pigs Arms. Lets face it, would you like to wake up to that early morning TV show, Tomorrow Today and see that 3 eggs have been severely beaten up after having a few dozen? Don’t think so.

Water – the most powerful chemical in the universe times 125 ml

Pepper  – a pinch. Just think of granny’s arse

Salt – see pepper

Chilli – see shotgun

Sugar – see granny’s arse or a teaspoon, I know which one I prefer

Shallot – finely chopped, about 1/4 cup or so

Corn – kernels about 90 grams

Potato powder – about 125 grams

Plain flour – see above

Psyllium – pinch, see granny’s arse

Cumin  – 1/4 teaspoon

Lager – Copious amounts

Method

  1. Grab the shotgun and shoot your cat. The world and mankind now owe you a favor which is my spicy sweet corn fritters. These I make without SR flour because when I went to school we never got to the letter S in the 14 years of drudgery I spent there. I found out about it later in life when my boss told me I was sacked, with a capital S, what a sunt.
  2. Go and get a mixing bowl, one that mixes will help here.
  3. Gently whisk the eggs. Don’t think of your boss or your partner while doing this, gentle, relax, unwind and put another round or two into the cat and then down a lager.
  4. Add about 125 ml of water or lager but no cat blood. Cats is bad.
  5. Great the shallot(love the misspelling) and add Colonel corn, shallot, powdered potato and flower(again yes I no), psylium chilli and cumin, salt, peeper and anything else I have left out. Drink more lager. Optional at this stage is to shoot the cat again however I have found over the years it is best to go and shoot someone else’s cat, he he he he.
  6. Mix the eff out of it. With these sort of recipes once fluid is added you may need to add more dry ingredients to get it to a North Sydney constituency, heavy batterish, 1950’ish fish coating style, thick, like me Brony and Tone, no SR flour means this needs to be reasonably dry before cooking. Drink another lager or two then argue with your partner, then relax, all will be good. Maybe get your partner to put a few rounds into the cat. Just sayin like.
  7. I coat a non stick pan with oil spray and use egg rings. To get an idea of an egg ring you stick your middle finger up a chickens arse. This gives you an estimation of what an egg ring feels like. Some people use capsicum slices as egg rings to avoid having to wash them up. If this happens then that person has just fingered one big fucker of a chicken. Shoot them if you have any ammo left. Fry at moderate to high heat to ensure the mixture cooks, flip half way. Drink another lager or two. Set fire to your neighbors fence, petrol is best, then the 6 to 8 fritters should be ready.
  8. After the Pleece have been make a sauce with yogurt, garlic, parsley, cucumber and cumin. Serve with salad, lemon wedges and crusty bread. Don’t drink any more lager at this stage as it could cause problems with your partner, neighbor or the Pleece. Go straight to whiskey shots.
  9. Grab the shotgun…

 

Foodge 60. 2 bits

14 Monday Mar 2016

Posted by in Big M, Foodge Private Dick, The Dining Room

≈ 20 Comments

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Story by Big M

I have no idea why I like this photo but Foodge does it everytime.

I have no idea why I like this photo but Foodge does it every time.

Foodge stood at the bar absentmindedly polishing a pint glass with a cloth sans dead flies. It was mid morning so O’Hoo wandered in for his usual morning tea of Trotters Ale, followed by Trotters Best, then a Granny’s Special IPA, Imodium, paracetamol and aspirin, that’s what IPA stands for, don’t it. “You’ve been making a right racquet in front of the pub.” Foodge observed, for observation was his forte, as a Very Private Dick.

O’Hoo wiped a foamy mustache away from his upper lip. “Big job, Mr Foodge, those old, cast iron down pipes leak like a busted arse when it rains, rusted to buggery.”

Foodge didn’t think that busted arse’s and buggery would go together that well. “So, you intend to put plastic ones in?” This sounded good in Foodge’s mind, like playing with Airfix model.

“Nah that would look like shit!” O’Hoo picked up another canoe (no, not a kayak, the place won’t run to kayaks, or litres for that matter). “I’m hitting them with some you-beaut rust converter, and then I’ll paint ‘em the same colour as the tiles. They used to have seals in each joint made of jute, or hemp, or some such thing, but I reckon we can afford some silicone!” says someone, sorry looking through the database I think this comes from O’Hoo, yes, no, maybe, yes, it is definitely O’Hoo.

Foodge was starting to get uncomfortable with all of the tradesman’s talk. “Yes, indeed, that will come up a treat.” The only silicone that Foodge had any experience was at Glenda’s House of Pain (and depilatory services).

“Foodge.”  O’Hoo leaned forward. “Have you had that chat with Granny, yet?”

“Did you have to bring that up?”  Foodge started polishing a glass with a great deal of nervous vigor. “I don’t know how to go about it. I’ve asked Mr Merv for advice, I asked Big M, and I even asked my accountant. They all said. Be yourself, just relax…’’

“Sounds like pretty fair advice, I mean, you have to snort things out, she’s obviously sweet on you! ” says someone, pretty damn good advice actually.

“Yes, I am Mr O’Hoo!” Granny had been in the doorway to the bar the whole time. And why wouldn’t she be sweet on him?

Mr Foodge, former Pleece Prosecutor, Private Dick, and handsome to boot, could have any girl in Inner Western Cyberia, but chooses to hang out here, in our humble pub. Granny turned hurriedly, wiping a tear on her sleeve as she descended the concrete steps to the cool and quiet of the cellar, tripping semi-fatally suffering a sub-epidural hemorrhage enabling the script writers to kill her off and never mention her again.

Foodge stepped through the doorway to catch up with her. ‘Ah, shit, mate, let her go, you’ll never understand sheilas.’ O’Hoo had slipped behind the bar to pull a fresh ale.

Foodge ignored O’Hoo’s sage advice, and caught up with Granny who was hunched over in the corner, the only sign of her crying was that periodic shuddering of her shoulders. ‘Granny.’

Granny turned away.

‘Er, um…Granny, what about if we, that is, just you and I take the Zephyr for a spin, and end up where we end up’

Granny turned to face Foodge. ‘Really, just us?’

‘Of course, O’Hoo can man the bar’

Foodge found himself in an embrace that was so tight; he thought he would never breath again.

 

 

 

 

 

Hung’s Wide World of Food

29 Monday Feb 2016

Posted by in Mark, The Dining Room

≈ 8 Comments

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Spinach and Lamb Pie Thanks to taste.com.au for the picture

Spinach and Lamb Pie
Thanks to taste.com.au for the picture

 

This is a variation of a recipe that I got from a Greek cookbook. I love the way Greeks eat and in summer, it’s usually grilled meat with fresh salad, crusty bread and of course, yogurt sauce. All washed down by a good crisp Chardonnay which is a town in Greek somewhere.

Ingredients

Lamb – I’ve used both minced lamb from the supermarket and left over lamb from a roast. They both work. I don’t roast much lamb any more so I use minced. If you use roasted lamb, trim excessive fat and chop.

Cumin

garlic, onion, chilli(optional) all chopped

salt and pepper to taste

tin of chopped tomatoes

Spinach – frozen is okay, fresh is better, chopped, but no matter which one try and get most of the water out. I use a sieve and then push it down with a potato masher. When it is baking the rest of the water should evaporate.

Carrot, grated

Zucchini, grated

Tomato paste

Short crust pastry

Method

In a fry pan with oil added on medium heat, add the garlic salt and pepper and cumin.
Stir through for a couple of minutes once you see the oil start to bubble.
Add onion. Stir through and cook a few minutes, don’t let this mix burn. If it does throw it out and start again.
Add the lamb and brown, breaking the mince up to get the meat finer. If it has been roasted you may even want to mince it slightly.

Add tomato paste and tinned tomatoes.
Add spinach, carrot and zucchini. Cook then down for just a couple of minutes.
Mix well, leave heat on low with lid off.
Get this as dry as you can without burning.

Turn heat off. Keep the lid off till cool, then cover.

I usually make this in the morning for that night but remember I’m a nut job. But truly the mix needs to be cool before it goes on the pastry.

I don’t make my own pastry. I get mine from the supermarket. Cut it like this, four cuts at roughly 45 degrees, this can make one big pie or several small ones.

pastry 2Fill the centre with the mix and fold over each edge leaving an opening at the top. Spray the pastry with oil and top the opening with feta. The picture one is similar but a is a full pie and is made with pastry strips across the top for effect.

I have used mashed potato instead of feta or grated cheese and there are a thousands of substitutions. Enjoy and many thanks to out Greek community.

 

Hung’s Wide World of Food

23 Tuesday Feb 2016

Posted by in Mark, The Dining Room

≈ 22 Comments

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man-161188__180

A man who was a chef in a previous life

Well for Gordon’s sake, here I am writing under Hung again, so many identities so little time. Anyhoo I’d like to provide a nice recipe. Oh yes nice, just to get even with my English teachers however the real Hung would say delicious and simple but never let a chance go by, like starting sentences with And and But, now one of my favorite get backs but hey I don’t hold grudges.

Ingredients

White fish fillets – now me I’d eat flathead tails. Whiting or Bream  would be good but get what you like, prawns, squid can also be added or substituted.Fish filleted, skin and bone out. If small leave fillets whole.

Bunch of spinach or silver beet, can use frozen[don’t you love the irony, I do], need some of the water,as least a cup. Chopped or pulsed in a food processor.

Chicken or vegetable stock, at gel stage. From the supermarket is easiest

Jalapeno chilies, mild. Look it needs chili, banana peppers if you really can’t.

Anchovies, at least 2. This is for the salt, add as many as you need or replace them with salt.

Red Pepper that have been char grilled and skins removed,chopped.

Black pepper

Olives I like green ones,I don’t know how black ones will go in this recipe. Chopped.

Tomato paste

The Method

In a sauce pan non stick 23cm with lid, put the in spinach, allow to steam off, you what enough fluid for the fish. When reduced add all the other ingredients tomato paste last and mix thoroughly . Add fish and cover with sauce. Return heat to simmer and when simmering put the lid on and turn the heat off. Five to ten minutes is enough. I prefer 10 minutes.Serve with anything your heat desires, I had rice but do what ever you like really.

Chris Gregory’s Chicken

20 Wednesday Aug 2014

Posted by in Mark, The Dining Room

≈ 8 Comments

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Pic courtesy taste.com.au

Pic courtesy taste.com.au

 

Here’s a conversation I had many years ago with a blogger by the name of Chris Gregory. He sent me this email about how he prepared chicken, a meat I love.

 

“I meant brine it to make it kosher. To be kosher the meat can’t have any blood in it, so they put the butchered meat in a salt water solution to make sure.

Okay. Cell walls are permeable, so you put the meat in the salt water, the moisture in the cells is wicked out. But because the meat is immersed in water, the solution maintains equilibrium, and moisture flows back into the cells, until everything is as moist and saturated as it can possibly be. Then, when you take it out of the brine, the moisture is locked in there, making the flesh as moist as it can be.

The other advantage of this is that you can infuse the meat with flavors by just putting stuff in the brine, like pepper, pineapple juice, ginger, whatever. It helps preserve the meat as well, and it means it’s already seasoned. And very, very succulent. It only really makes sense to do this to poultry and pork (fish are better dry cured, usually). But it really improves poultry and pork, which is bred to be way too lean these days and dries out easily.

I’d cut a chicken in half then put each half in a separate ziplock bag with a third of a cup of salt (kosher salt if you can get it, but preferably something with no caking agent) and a quarter of a cup of brown sugar. Fill with water, then put the bags in the fridge overnight. You could also use orange juice or pineapple juice instead of water, but reduce the sugar. Whole peppercorns are good too.

Next day wash them off then let them air dry on a rack. Brush with oil and season just before cooking. I’d smoke them, but a charcoal BBQ like a Weber will also do a good job. Or cook them in an oven the usual way.”

First published: http://hungsworld.wordpress.com/2014/08/20/chris-gregorys-chicken/

HOO’s Wide World of Sauce

28 Monday Jul 2014

Posted by in Mark, The Dining Room

≈ 12 Comments

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Pic Courtesy taste.com.au

Pic Courtesy taste.com.au

Here’s a sauce recipe that can be used across many different meals and is great for us that live alone as it is a good way to get in your veggies.

Ingredients

  • olive oil
  • salt and pepper
  • sugar
  • chilli powder
  • paprika
  • garlic
  • onion
  • carrot
  • capsicum
  • zucchini
  • celery
  • tomato
  • wine
  • tomato paste
  • stock cube
  • stock or water
  • parsley or basil or both

Method

All your veggies can be very coarsely chopped as I use a stick blender to finish the sauce. Stick blenders are great, simple to use and easy to clean not like all of those fancy ones you see advertised on TV.  The carrot needs to be peeled. I worked with a girl named Karen who was a chef and she did her training in Paris. Karen told me always peel carrots.

In a deep sided pot add the oil and place on a medium heat. It is important that this sauce never gets too hot as we don’t want to lose the vitamins. Think along the line that we are going to sweat the veggies down  rather than saute. The pot also needs to have a lid as we are going to capture most of the fluid that comes off during the cook.

Add the garlic chilli and paprika. Gently cook for a few minutes, then the onion, then the carrot, capsicum, celery and zucchini last. Think like this, hard veggies first, softer ones last. Stir occasionally adding the veggies one at a time over around 10 minutes.

Put the lid on and turn the heat down to low and cook for around 10 to 15 minutes.

Now add fluid. I use tinned tomatoes usually two cans, tomato paste, some white wine, a stock cube and the sugar. Mix through. Now add a bit more water/stock/wine so everything is covered, sometimes up to half a cup. Don’t over add fluid as if you need to simmer this down to thicken some of the goodness in those veggies will be lost.  Lid back on, low heat, 10 to 15 minutes.  Turn the heat off and leave the lid on till all the steam has stopped. I have a Scanpan pot, approximately 25 cm wide and 15cm deep with a transparent lid which makes it easier to gauge but allow say another 15 minutes.

Add the parsley or basil. With your stick blender pulse the sauce in the pot and stir. By this I mean, blend for 2 to 3 seconds. Then using the blender as a stirrer, stir the sauce. This causes chunks to rise. As a chunk comes to the top, pulse that site for 2 or 3 seconds.  Do this till you get a good consistency. Add salt and pepper to taste. I always use iodised salt as iodine is a very difficult trace element to get in your diet.

Now, you don’t want the sauce to resemble soup so it is better to under blend then over blend. It needs to retain some body however with all the veggies well chopped.  Cool. Portion. Freeze. This usually makes up to eight portions by using 2 x440 tins of diced tomatoes and one of every vegetable.

I use this sauce on pizza, meatballs, chicken pieces and prawns. Beautiful with pasta and freshly grated Parmesan cheese.

 This sauce costs me about ten bucks to make plus elbow grease. Enjoy.

Warning: Sometimes I cook the sauce a bit longer with the lid off to thicken or if I have added the meatballs or chicken pieces – usually thighs.  ( If added these take about 15 to 20 minutes to cook). Once blended this sauce “pops” especially if the heat is too high. If you cook the sauce for whatever reason with the lid off get it onto the lowest heat possible. I learnt the hard way and had to clean up sauce that ended up all over the place.

First published: http://hungsworld.wordpress.com/2014/07/28/hoos-wide-world-of-sauce/

Mussels Singapore Style

16 Monday Jun 2014

Posted by in Mark, The Dining Room

≈ 10 Comments

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Picture courtesy Taste.com.au

Picture courtesy Taste.com.au

 

Now here is a story behind a recipe that happened to me about 10 years or so ago. One day I came home from work and I never went back. After years of excessive work hours and stress I decided I’d had enough. Our bills were all paid and our boys were working and the wonderful Tutu who was working part time did a few extra shifts to get us by while I had a bit of a breather.

To keep my brain active I enrolled in TAFE to study food technology. Now you all know I am not a morning person so as usual I was a bit late on the first day and when I walked into the classroom there was only one chair left next to this charming looking Asian woman.

At the next break she introduced herself as Jasmin and from that moment forward Jasmin and I became friends. We sat with each other, studied together and when we did field visits she always came with me. I would always help Jasmin with her class work and give her some pointers with assignments but she did the work herself. Most of the problems for her were simply language, mainly colloquialisms. See back in Singapore Jasmin was wealthy, no extremely wealthy, her husband was a multimillionaire. Both of her boys had been accepted into the local university so she followed to keep an eye on them and enrolled in the same course as me to keep her brain active.

One day she attended school and asked if I could help with her homework. I had to make it clear to Jasmin that I was a student not a teacher and that I couldn’t do the work for her. She understood perfectly and when I read her papers I realised this was one very bright woman, so I helped her. She asked me why I would always have a cheese and ham sandwich. I told her, they are easy to make and portable. Jasmin told me not to bring lunch tomorrow and from that day on she fed me lunch everyday Singapore style and man it was amazing, prawn dumplings being my favourite just ahead of curried chicken and noodle.

At the end of the year Jasmin told me she was returning home. She was home sick and the boys were doing fine. She shouted me this meal at a Singaporean restaurant in town as a farewell gift.

Ingredients

Mussels – the chef did 24 per serve

Bland oil

Garlic

Chilli

Prawn paste – belacan

Tomatoes finely chopped

Beer

Crusty bread

Method

Heat oil in a wok. Don’t use oil with flavour, canola is best. Saute garlic, chilli and prawn paste then tomatoes. Add beer, I would use light beer, lets face it it’s not worth drinking. Let it reduce then add mussels. Put lid on and using pot holders give it all a good toss so that everything mixes. Steam for 5 to 7 minutes. Discard any mussels that do not open and plate up. Drizzle mussels with sauce and serve with crusty bread.

Serve this dish with beer not wine and it is okay to soak up the sauce with the bread. Jasmin made sure the beers kept coming and I got through and another round or two of mussels. Jasmin’s chauffeur drove me home and for years after we kept in contact by email. Unfortunately my computer crashed and I lost her email address. But doesn’t matter, it was a fantastic year, a fantastic friendship from two very different people and I will never forget her. The other pleasing thing is I know that somewhere in Singapore someone will no how to say “fair dinkum mate”.

 

Turkish Herbed Lamb Pizza

06 Friday Jun 2014

Posted by in Mark, The Dining Room

≈ 15 Comments

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Lahmacun-(turkish-pizza) Courtesy: SBS Food

Lahmacun-(turkish-pizza) Pic Courtesy: SBS Food

 

Many years ago the wonderful Tutu and I lived in New South Wales. In our town there was a great little restaurant called The Istanbul that funnily enough served Turkish food. We would go to the Istanbul usually about once a fortnight or so and after a while we had tasted everything on the menu at least twice. They also had a specials board which we sampled keenly until one day the owner approached us. He said to us hey look, you come here all the time and like our food, how about we do a deal, you book in, we will bring you the food at twenty bucks a head, as much as you want. Perfect. From then on we would take a seat, they would pour us a wine and out the food would come. Then one day we were served Lahmacun, I was already a pizza addict and yet here was a pizza with no cheese that was to die for. Tutu is coming over tonight and this is what we will have. Enjoy.

 

Ingredients.

A pizza dough – do you really need for me to tell you this bit. I use my bread machine to make mine.

Now I make enough for one large pizza given the tray I have so I’ll leave it up to you but for the topping you will need,

Lamb mince

Garlic

Onion

Cinnamon

Allspice

Pine Nuts

Tomato paste

Tomatoes, chopped and not tinned.

Chicken stock

Lemon juice

Mint

Parsley

Baby spinach

Yoghurt with some added water to pour.

Gordon feels hungry

Gordon feels hungry

Method.

Make a pizza dough [spooky music plays in background]

Fry off the lamb mince in a pan till browned. You will want to render off the fat by straining it.

Heat some oil in the same fry pan and saute the garlic and onion. Add spices and nuts. When the pine nuts are golden add tomato, paste, stock and juice. Add the mince and cook on low till you have reduced the liquid, this has to be fairly dry. Remove from heat and fold in mint, parsley and baby spinach.

Roll out your dough and top with lamb mix. 15 minutes in a very hot oven should do. Cut into pieces and in a jug put yoghurt and some water so the yoghurt runs like a gravy. Serve and add yoghurt as desired.

Crispin likes

Crispin likes, Follow me on Facebook, if you’re game.

Anyway I work with a Turkish girl and have spoken to her about this recipe. She and her husband love it but she said to me “When I make it Hung I add six chopped red chillies. When my husband eats it he starts to sweat, and sweat and sweat but he eats it all”

“So why do you do that Woman who cannot be named for Privacy reasons?”

“Because I can Hung, because I can”. Strange but true.